Soulja Boy Crib Jacked

1. hey tmz,

jay leno knows how to 'moonwalk' & can do the 'macarena' !!!

RJ Johnson is BACK !!!

Posted at 11:58AM on Jan 3rd 2009 by RJ Johnson is BACK !!!

2. To Son-Son Boy And ALL OTHER FAKE ASS RAPPERS CHILL OUT B4 THE NEXT TIME ITZ UR MOMZ HOUSE! NOT EVERYBODY IS TOUGH & SOULJA BOY U NOT TOUGH! LIKE FAKE ASS FAT JOE SAID...."LEAN BACK"!!!!!

Posted at 11:59AM on Jan 3rd 2009 by eyeblamerap

3. one and all,

i must resurrect my hypothesis that of which i am most known: 'Bling
Splatt the Cause of Pre-Mature Death among Rappers'.

As submitted to the New England Journal of Health, the American
Medical Association, National Geographic, Reader's Digest, and
Redbook.

My postulate that the root cause of death among rappers is not due to
black on black crime, per se. But, due to the inordinate use of metals
within the framework of their upper torso, in the region of what is
known on the street as 'da grill'. Commonly used metals such as
silver, gold, platinum, and an occasional diamond or two (dependent
upon the rappers ability to sell their wares - ie records - ) as
placed in the oral cavity of said rapper, causes reactions such that
mortality rates are a foregone conclusion. There is no cure for
'Bling Splatt", the diagnosis is death.

What causes 'Bling Splatt'? There is no simple answer. My theory
revolves about the idea that low IO levels of said rappers combined
with calcuim and phosphorous (previously stated in street slang as
'da grill') when mixed with metals and/or metallic objects react such
that positively charged electrons are emitted which when released
within the parietal lobe send such a large electrical pulse
throughout the parietal region of the brain, that the organ cannot
absorb...in essence...KABOOM !!!...the brain has exploded...ie "Brain
Splatt".

Collegues at the Bellevue Mental Hospital, Def Jam Records Inc.,
Johns Hopkins Medical University, and Toys 'R Us are in concert with
my hypothesis, theories, and ideas. They are all in agreement that
more study and review is needed in this arena of medicine. I have
applied for a $500 Billion bailout for study and research and a few
luxury amenities for myself (Mustang Ranch, Nevada trips for me and
the staff, and dubs for my Prius). President-elect Obama has been
apprised of this situation and receives daily updates as to which
rapper is next believed to contract the illness as such. The Central
Intelligence Agency (CIA), the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI),
the Secret Service, MI6, Scotland Yard, and Elmer Fudd are conducting
intelligence quotient (IO) tests on secretly on unsuspecting rappers,
as we speak, in order to compile and update their existing files of
low intelligence rappers.

Such a twist of fate that belies our 'mos def freestylin'
word-slangin' prophets. That there by the grace of God, he shall
speak. But, there by the grace of God, when he speaks with mouths
full of 'bling', his head will go BOOM !!!

My services are rendered to expose the truth regards the death of our
nations rappers. Word !!!

einStinE

Posted at 12:06PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by einStinE

4. Who cares? Souljaboy's 15 minutes are OVER!!! NO MORE FAKE RAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted at 1:12PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by p1tey1

5. Just get Officer Rick Ross to solve the case. He will hunt those criminals down like its nothing.

BTW thats crazy that SB got robbed like that. I dont like his music but he is still a kid/person, so iits kinda sad.

Posted at 1:13PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by Mr. COOL

6. These are Obama's people.Typical behavior for black "rap stars". Hopefully, they will continue to kill each other.

Posted at 2:01PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by lensmanct

7. This story smells like a Jaquin Pheonix rap.

Posted at 2:08PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by Dollar Store Diva

8. 6. These are Obama's people.Typical behavior for black "rap stars". Hopefully, they will continue to kill each other.

Posted at 2:01PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by lensmanct
▲
In such cases, like you, I am a staunch advocate of the implementation of eugenics.

Posted at 4:39PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by Yo momma shuda SWALLOWED

9. 6. These are Obama's people.Typical behavior for black "rap stars". Hopefully, they will continue to kill each other.

Posted at 2:01PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by lensmanct

8. 6. These are Obama's people.Typical behavior for black "rap stars". Hopefully, they will continue to kill each other.

Posted at 2:01PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by lensmanct
▲
In such cases, like you, I am a staunch advocate of the implementation of eugenics.

Posted at 4:39PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by Yo momma shuda SWALLOWED


Yes, (rolls eyes), Obama has a LOT in common with Soulja Boy. I hear John McCain and Ozzy Osbourne are spitting images as well. E-D-U-C-A-T-I-O-N people....PLEASE! Ignorance is not bliss...it just makes you look really..well...DUMB.

Posted at 6:27PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by Mo

10. That sucks! He should make a new hit and use that to buy a better house

Posted at 6:30PM on Jan 3rd 2009 by SPIT :P=

11. einStinE...I see now, it's all becoming clear.

Can you tell me, I'd like to know more about the symptoms of "Bling Spatt". For instance, does it contribute to these self-proclaimed rap 'artists' inability to correctly converse in the english language? Is pigeon english taking over? I mean, can anyone explain to me what "Soulja Boy up in de HOOOO why me do why me roll something something soulja boy and SUPERMAN and something hooo now i mean/need YOU crank dat Souja Boy (repeat)" mean? You know, call me what you will but it seems like this boy is having trouble expressing himself clearly. Perhaps he should have invested in some remedial english classes rather than his pooncy diamond earrings.

Oh the humanity!

Posted at 12:12AM on Jan 4th 2009 by Rufeg

12. Be carefull what you whih for!

Posted at 4:42AM on Jan 4th 2009 by HLove

13. 11. einStinE...I see now, it's all becoming clear.

Can you tell me, I'd like to know more about the symptoms of "Bling Spatt". For instance, does it contribute to these self-proclaimed rap 'artists' inability to correctly converse in the english language? Is pigeon english taking over? I mean, can anyone explain to me what "Soulja Boy up in de HOOOO why me do why me roll something something soulja boy and SUPERMAN and something hooo now i mean/need YOU crank dat Souja Boy (repeat)" mean? You know, call me what you will but it seems like this boy is having trouble expressing himself clearly. Perhaps he should have invested in some remedial english classes rather than his pooncy diamond earrings.

Oh the humanity!

Posted at 12:12AM on Jan 4th 2009 by Rufeg



Rufeg,

this boi got "BLING SPLATT" & he even got no "bling in da
grill". he jus' stoopid !!! he got a low enough IO, that hizzee brain
went KABOOM on it's own !!!

if you're not schooled on what "BLING SPLATT" is...get busy and
school yo sef, & not play wit yo sef !!!

Praise be to einStinE and his theory of 'The Cause of Pre-Mature
Death among Rappers is BLING SPLATT',
waYneNutoN

Posted at 1:00PM on Jan 4th 2009 by waYneNuton

14. nobody should be robbed! some people are idiots! crime does not know any color! sounds like some people are jealous they just can't make raps like him! lol i might not enjoy his rhymes but evidentally is is doing something that we cant!

Posted at 1:11PM on Jan 5th 2009 by crazy

15. i personally love soulja boy and i think ya'll need to stop hating on him cause that could be you one day....ya'll jus mad because he got money and everybody love him...so all ya;ll need to get off his jock. REAL TALK

Posted at 11:17AM on Jan 6th 2009 by Princess92