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Candy to Tori:

Get Real, Baby

7/27/2009 1:15 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Candy & Tori SpellingCandy Spelling -- the mother famously at war with her daughter -- has taken the bold step of communicating with Tori Spelling through TMZ ... and her opening line isn't gonna get her a lot of invites. Here's the open letter in all its glory:

EXCLUSIVE TO: TMZ.COM
TO: MIDDLE-AGED REALITY SHOW STARS (LIKE MY DAUGHTER)
FROM: CANDY SPELLING

I Know many middle-aged people have issues about their parents and their upbringing. I did. My memories didn't match all those of my mother, and, funny thing, it's the same way with my daughter.

Life has consequences. What you say is on the record. Other people have feelings.


I have a vested interest in this subject. My daughter, Tori's, two-part season finale revolves around my granddaughter's first birthday party and how she has made what seems like an agonizing decision to invite me.

Cue music. Cue sideways glances. Cue Lights.

I did get an invitation just in time for the RSVP deadline. I'm sure its delivery will be on next week's episode with some comment about my house or driveway or street or something they won't like. I wonder if that will be spread out over one part or two. Sigh.

A big party wasn't how I envisioned meeting my granddaughter for the first time; but, hey, this is Hollywood, and my grandchildren have become reality show props, too. At the time I emailed "yes," I didn't realize I was being set up for a two-parter, even though it was clear I was being invited to be part of a segment for my daughter's reality show.

Spoiler alert. Don't read this if you plan to sit through an hour of people looking at their watches and saying "she's late." I decided my first meeting with my granddaughter should be on home video, not primetime cable; so I emailed that I would not be attending.

Back to other reality stars. My husband taught me that the plots have to be fresh and updated. The same old whining gets tired after a while. Enough complaining about what may or may not have happened during first grade or YMCA camp, or what vegetable you were forced to endure, especially when you are privileged enough to be on TV and get paid for it.

For all the reality show personalities, please remember that real life doesn't get edited to make things better or worse or get better ratings. You're responsible for what you do. Life isn't just a show. And your families can't just be props. Make your own season finale without creating conflicts you will regret later.
1285 COMMENTS

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16.

kitty    

i am glad i found out if she is gonna show or not!! i was kinda wondering

thanks TMZ and Candy Spelling!

1826 days ago
17.

JSS    

Sorry but both of these women need to get a clue and grow up.

1826 days ago
18.

Muzzy    

Tori is MIDDLE AGED? Wow. Can Candy become any more out of touch? And why the hell do you email your daughter to tell her you can't come to the party when she was practically in the MIDDLE of the party! Ever heard of a telephone?

1826 days ago
19.

tellitlikeitis    

Hey Candi-

You need to suck it up and do it on your daughters terms. Not yours. I
am guessing your not used to that.

Sounds like you may never know your grandchildren.....

1826 days ago
20.

Jessica    

Candy needs to act her age.

1826 days ago
21.

Sidney    

Gee, why not just request to meet privately before the birthday party and then enjoy the party with the rest of the world. Clearly this open letter isn't facilitative, so one must wonder if your goal is to resolve or to one-up.

1826 days ago
22.

bb    

What an attention whore. It's disgusting. She seriously couldn't do this in private? Just HAD to put this where everybody and their damn mama would see.

1826 days ago
23.

Alicia    

Wow Wow Wow, I'll bet Tori's dad is rolling over in his grave a bunch of times. No side taking from me but these ladies should grow up. This behavior is ridiculous, and to write open letters on TMZ? That's an awesome creative way to settle the issues. NOT!

1826 days ago
24.

Paparazzo@frog.cc    

I bet when Candy dies, she will leave all her money to charities. Ha ha!

1826 days ago
25.

Miia    

I feel sorry for Candy. Tori is a f*&king bitch! The other day she co hosted with KathyLee (another bitch) I shut the tv , I cant stand Tori. Is Tori crying cause daddy didnt leave his spoiled little girl money. Come on work for your money like everyone else. Candy should take her into court for grandparents right. I hope Tori know WHATCOMES AROUND GOES AROUND. Hoepfully her kids will do the same thing to her!!!!

1826 days ago
26.

Someone who actually loves and gets along w her mother    

I'm sorry, but Candy's e-mail to TMZ shows just how pathetic and sad a person she really is. Once again she is playing the poor victim. If Tori has faults, the are minimal compared to any mother who would send a letter to TMZ to communicate w/ her daughter rather than picking up the phone.

Get a freakin life Candy. You call out Tori for her reality show, but truth is the true media whore is you!!!!

1826 days ago
27.

This is Wacked    

Candy states:" I decided my first meeting with my granddaughter should be on home video, not primetime cable; so I emailed that i would not be attending." Funny how Candy has decided to choose TMZ to respond to her daughter to air her grievances. The pots doing what the black kettles doing, but in a different medium. Take it up with your therapists, not TMZ or TV.

1826 days ago
28.

Anastasia Beaverhousen    

Team Tori!

1826 days ago
29.

dssdsd    

this lady Candy is a bitch! my coworker used to be one of her assistants and said that candy ordered flowers and they were brought to her but she didnt like them..so instead of sending them back ...the bitch shredded them to pieces..HER MOM IS PHYSCO ...LOOK AT HER NAME "CANDY"

1826 days ago
30.

Lori    

Candy~~

youre a wonderful mom! I support you. Been thru the same issue/s. I wish you both the best.
Good for you for contacting TMZ, you knew who would be reading this, and the fans are looking
and learning from the tabloids, so why not reach out where the stories take place, that is how we
all learn about them. Why cant a person stand up for themselves, thru the same places that post stories about them?
this is one way of getting thru
to us, that means those of us that read this info. If we werent interested, then why are we here?

great thinking.

best regards..
Lori

1826 days ago
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