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Lindsay Lohan -- I Trust MJ's Bodyguard

4/10/2011 10:30 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Lindsay Lohan is pretty fired up about using Michael Jackson's former bodyguard, Alberto Alvarez ... telling friends she's definitely IMPRESSED by the way he handled the King of Pop.

0408_lindsay_lohan_bodygaurd_ex_npg
Sources close to the starlet tell us Alvarez and Lindsay have a mutual friend ... who contacted Lindsay after seeing the pap crush that surrounded her last week at New York's JFK Airport.

We're told LiLo's friend wanted to to make sure she was safe -- so he recommended Alvarez as a bodyguard to help the actress out when she travels ... because he racked up tons of experience fending off crowds during his time with MJ.

So far, we're told Lindsay thinks Alberto does his job "expertly" ... and plans to continue using him in high paparazzi situations. Oh and the best part ... so far he's doing the work pro bono.


243 COMMENTS

No Avatar
91.

lou    

LOU tell me about the emails you and Sean sent to the producers of the film. Did you say for getta bout his daughter Sean and I don't want Lindsay in the film...

Posted at 8:14 AM on Apr 10, 2011 by john smith

________________

My Dearest John,

YOU have the super-powered computer, browser, checker, scanner, tracker, sniffer, finder, etc. so YOU figure it out.

Love,
Lou

1238 days ago
92.

Tony Johnson    

The De’LOU’sionals

Their lives are crap
One name is Lori
Their lips just Flap
They have no Glory
One name is Vorlon
And she’s a MORON
One name is Lou
She cant stand YOU
One name is Davey
She left the Navy
They threw her out
Because of DOUBT
They have no life
So they trash others
They live in trailers
And dream of sailors
They talk to Davey
For stories from the Navy
The things she did
The shafts she slid
Her stories of glory’s
Are just like Lori’s

GLORY HOLES THAT IS

The De’LOU’sionals hate and vitriol shall follow in various post and comments for Miss Lindsay Lohan… It’s a remarkable hate in that it is directed towards someone they have NEVER nor will EVER meet. They will sit at their computer all day posting and venting HATE in ways unimaginable to a sane person with decent sensibilities… But then again, what can you expect from a DE’LOU’SIONAL crowd! They remind me of the old ragged crazy lady who always showed up at a English beheading with no teeth and a missing eye smoking a stolen cigar screaming, ‘HANG HER!

They’ll probably comment on the incorrect spelling of delusional but it is spelled de’LOU’sional to point out that one of their names is so appropriate in my CHOICE of spelling the word… They HARP and HATE on EVERYTHING! Give ‘em a break ~ their lives are miserable!

GOING IN! GONNA NEED BACK UP!

1238 days ago
93.

dreamon    

What is astonishing is that TJ and JS actually think they're insults have any impact beyond making them easily dismissable?

If they believed in the libel laws they're threatening people with they woundn't say what they say, would they?

The Lohan grasp of law has always been weak. I loved when Lindsay tweeted the third article of the United Nations Declaration of Human Rights in response to her July court outcome. You can't write **** that funny.

1238 days ago
94.

Davey-Boy    

I know, I know! This "re-libel" attorney is going to represent John Smith in "corte."

Posted at 8:12 AM on Apr 10, 2011 by lou

~~~

TONY BAJA thinks that my opinion that LieLo is a skank is a torte.

1238 days ago
95.

lou    

The photo needs some of those comic book word bubbles. Here let me give it a try...

Alberto: "Come this way, Ms. Lohan."
Lindsay: "Gawd, I hope none of these wretched commoners touches me."

Posted at 8:15 AM on Apr 10, 2011 by Davey-Boy

-----

Also:

"WHERE'S the G@dd@mn Propofal? You SAID it was stashed away somewhere by Dr. Evil, so where IS it?!?"

1238 days ago
96.

lou    

I know, I know! This "re-libel" attorney is going to represent John Smith in "corte."

Posted at 8:12 AM on Apr 10, 2011 by lou

~~~

TONY BAJA thinks that my opinion that LieLo is a skank is a torte.

Posted at 8:20 AM on Apr 10, 2011 by Davey-Boy

____________________

Phony Haha thinks that it's a torte, alright - the kind that you bake and eat.

1238 days ago
97.

dreamon    

Alternate heading:

Former MJ body guard gets Bubbles the chimp.

1238 days ago
98.

john smith    

Lou that's my nj Tony Soprano accent, not a spelling mistake, duh....Winning!!!!

1238 days ago
99.

lou    

I feel extremely honored to figure so prominently in Phony Diplomy's rant. Since crockerfeller has left our lives, and can no longer put my name at least 50 times on his "haters hate hate hate," list, I'm delighted to have Phony Diplomy fill the void.

Thanks, Phony, and carry on.

Love,
Lou

1238 days ago
100.

Tony Johnson    

I think the only one who keeps mentioned OR HAS mentioned LIBEL is the HIGHLY DE'LOU'sional DREAMER who CANT STOP TALKING ABOUT ME! I care so little about your inconsequential SELF that I didn't even put you in my De'LOU'sional ditty!

AAAWWWWW! HER FEELINGS ARE HURT!

SHE'S GOING TO CRY AND RUST HER WHEELCHAIR WHEELS!

Oh sorry their wood! She's going to ROT them with her TOXIC TEARS!

1238 days ago
101.

Davey-Boy    

DUIna's "source" claims that the primary reason LieLo hooked up with MJ's trusted bodyguard is because he knew of suitcases filled with leftover Propoful.

A flight attendant on the private airoplane overheard LieLo playing Huey Lewis "I Want a New Drug" over and over again on LieLo's iPod during the flight from NY to CA.

1238 days ago
102.

lou    

Alternate heading:

Former MJ body guard gets Bubbles the chimp.

Posted at 8:22 AM on Apr 10, 2011 by dreamon

_________

LMAO!

Better watch out, Phony Haha and johnboy are gonna add that to their big bad list of "America Hates Lindsay."

Boys, don't forget to add Betty White. Oh, heck, you might just as well go ask Daddy Mikey for his list of haters, you're just juniors and not too good at it yet.

Love,
Lou

1238 days ago
103.

Davey-Boy    

Phony Haha thinks that it's a torte, alright - the kind that you bake and eat.

Posted at 8:22 AM on Apr 10, 2011 by lou

~~~

LieLow's favorite is strawberry snot flavored with her special blend of white-powder sugar on top.

1238 days ago
104.

lou    

Sorry, Tiny, but I was talking about Tony Baja aka Phony Haha aka Phony Diplomy, NOT you. You don't even rate on my radar.

UNLESS you're telling us :-D that you are also Phony Haha Tony Baja? Awwwww, say you didn't forget that you were playing the part of two Tony's, please? :-D

1238 days ago
105.

lou    

Phony Haha thinks that it's a torte, alright - the kind that you bake and eat.

Posted at 8:22 AM on Apr 10, 2011 by lou

~~~

LieLow's favorite is strawberry snot flavored with her special blend of white-powder sugar on top.

Posted at 8:28 AM on Apr 10, 2011 by Davey-Boy
_____________

I was actually thinking of strawberry snort-flavored..but, okay.

Add those to the list, Phony Diplomy.

1238 days ago
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