Born – August 23, 1978
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, U.S.

Basketball player, NBA champion, adulterer.

Drafted out of high school by the Charlotte Hornets, traded to the Lakers, considered to be one of the greatest shooting guards of all time, yada yada yada, nothing you don't already know if you follow sports (and nothing you wanna know if you don't).

Was given the nickname Black Mamba by a very dear friend ... himself. Not sure if it stuck or not.

Speaking of Black Mamba, he was accused of sexual assault against a 19-year-old hotel worker in Colorado. Case was dismissed after his accuser refused to testify against him. Possibly she was too busy bathing in cash she got from Kobe. Kidding!!!! (maybe not kidding)

For the record, Kobe admitted to having sex with the woman … but insisted it wasn’t rape. He did admit his favorite sexual activity … but it’s too graphic to write here. But for more info, check out Page 19 in the Kobe Bryant Police Interview. WARNING – It’s graphic.

Made things right with his wife by giving her a $4 million diamond ring … see, money CAN buy you love.

Kobe and Mrs. Kobe remained insanely happy... right up until she filed for divorce in 2011 … because she believed he was cheating on her, again.

Patched things up with Vanessa, again, after he gave her the deed to three of his mansions.

Cheating + money = love.

Joakim Noah's Victoria Secret Model GF Lais Ribeiro Rocks Thong Bikini In Malibu

Joakim Noah Shows Off Shredded Beach Bod With Josh Brolin and John McEnroe

Joakim Noah Strips Butt Naked In Santa Monica Street

Joakim Noah Led Peace March In Chicago

Joakim Noah Wants To Stay With Knicks, 'I Love New York'

Joakim Noah -- Skips Dinner with Cadets at West Point ... I'm Anti-War (UPDATE)

Joakim Noah -- Check Out This Butt! (PHOTO GALLERY)

Spike Lee -- Knicks Need to Sign Joakim ... Doubtful On KD (VIDEO)

Joakim Noah SUES Le Coq Sportif -- I Wore Your Crappy Shoes & You Screwed Me!

Joakim Noah -- NBA Lockout Is a Beach

Joakim Noah, Chicago Bulls Star -- Beer Pongin' During NBA Lockout

NBA Fines Joakim Noah $50k for Gay Slur