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Kris Humphries & Kim K -- Sizing Up Their Relationship

4/28/2011 5:45 AM PDT BY Johnny Lopez

Despite their, er, differences, NJ Nets Kris Humphries and Kim Kardashian are a good fit.

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The happy couple made their way through LAX yesterday.

They're livin' large.



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For more sports stories, check out tmzsports.com!
104 COMMENTS

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76.

Darkhawk    

That girl put the O in Hoe cause shes with someone different ever other month anyone with money can screw Kim

1224 days ago
77.

Amy Barnes    

WOW!!! He makes her hiney look tiny...

1224 days ago
78.

Szzzzz    

The K family must have OJ to thank for their 'famousness' ! It was his trial that made them the $$$$ that they now have. With that $$$ they have been able to BUY the media. It's all wrong. Who are the K's and who cares. I could be as famous as them too if I had the $$$ their dad made as a lawyer for OJ !!!!!!!!!

1224 days ago
79.

Who Am I?    

I am NOT the typical mother. I say this because although MOST mothers would eat cut glass before they exploit their daughters, my entire purpose in life is to pimp out my daughters for the highest price for my own selfish purposes. I am in my 50's, look like I'm in my 60's, look like The Joker, have a face that cannot move from all of the plastic surgeries and botox injections, and act like a 13-year old with no life experience. Although I am a MATURE woman who SHOULD ACT like one, I believe that if I act young and stupid, I will remain young forever! I am afraid of getting old so I dress like a 13-year old, which TOTALLY makes people think that I'm in MY teens, right??!?!!? I have brainwashed my daughters to believe that people are jealous of them because they are my meal ticket to fame and notoriety. Since my daughters are losing their trashy appeal, I am becoming even more desperate to pimp them out. I told them that when the "fans" really disappear, we will sell their turds and used tampons on EBay. Yeah, I know that it's hard to believe, but my ass is just THAT sorry and pathetic. MOST people consider me and my daughters from my first marriage pure trash. My wh0rish ways and his own guilt for getting a double-murderer off literally killed my first husband, but I am sure that he's roasting in hell as I write this. My oldest daughter is unmarried and has a ba$tard son. My youngest daughter entered a fake marriage that I negotiated. My middle daughter took my advice and put out a sex tape! Yes, a SEX TAPE!!! I convinced her that if Paris Hilton could do one she should too since she spent wayyyyyyyy more money on plastic surgery than Paris Hilton did! After all, MY daughter paid good money for those fake boobs and that fake ass....so there was no way in hell that I was gonna let her walk this earth and not show her fake parts all the time.....HER body was made for porn dammit.....HELLO!!!!!!!!!!! I even told my middle daughter that I would go with her to Vivid Entertainment and negotiate the price of the sex tape before she and some random Black man did the deed on film. Aren't I the BEST mom, ever?!?!?!? Interestingly, the man in the porno HAD to be Black!!! Man! My middle and youngest daughter are addicted to rich Black ****! That's my girls!!!! After we negotiated the price of the sex tape, I told my middle daughter to pretend like the tape was leaked when Vivid releases it. I told her that even though people would question it and call her a big-time, loser porno wh0re, over time, these same people would forget all about the sex tape....especially if I could pimp, I mean parlay this filthy sex tape to other skank business ventures. I keep control over my daughters by telling them that plastic surgeons have made them the most beautiful women in the world and that everyone is jealous of them! My daughters are such good wh0res who make a lot of money for their Mama! While many mothers have daughters that go to college and do productive things with their lives, my daughters birth ba$tard children, flash their nasty boobs on balconies, enter fake marriages, are stupid plastic-surgery addicts who have the intelligence of lint, and star in their own sex tapes where they are deep ****ed and peed on!!! And it was MY idea that my middle daughter let the man in the sex tape ram her ass hole and pee on her face! Classy, huh? I am a TOTAL embarrassment to my second husband, and I have literally brought his reputation to the gutter with mine and my trashy daughters. He was once an Olympian that people ONCE respected but all of the plastic surgeries to his face have him looking like a transgender woman now. My second husband knows that I am wh0re trash but he stays with me because let's face it, who else would have either of us, considering that we are both so disgusting and fugly?!?!? I also come to US Weekly threads and write under many fake names and pretend that I am a fan. I also slam the women of Sex and the City because they are professional, naturally beautiful, talented, and well-respected ICONS. Meanwhile, my daughters are known for their stupid antics, wh0redom, and STD's. I believe that money is more important than core values like self-respect, class, dignity, honor, elegance, and intelligence. But really, I know that my family and I are pure trash and that I am an UTTER disgrace to classy, loving, unselfish mothers everywhere. I have the face of the Joker, the body of an old washed-up wh0re and am a disgrace to myself and my family. Who Am I?

1224 days ago
80.

Who Am I?    

Hey Truth About Kim! Although you plagarized my original post (entitled "Who Am I?") I am NOT mad at you! You added some things, which is GREAT!!!! I have put this post on E! too many times to count, but needless to say, it always gets deleted! So make sure that you keep the post going! Good Job (Not Great because it was not your original idea!)! Hey! Have you seen the one that I wrote called "Who Am I?" about Kris Kartrashian??? I will send it to you soon!

1224 days ago
81.

reenypie77    

OMG The Truth About Kim.....LOLOLOLOLOL....I think you have her pegged my friend!! Bravo!!!!

1224 days ago
82.

Who Am I?    

I am 30 years old, look 45 years old, and act like a vain and self-obsessed 13-year old. My body is full of plastic parts and my b00bs, a$$, lips, cheeks, hair, lipo-ed body, and chin are all bought and paid for, courtesy of a plastic surgeon. I am also jealous of Paris Hilton and put out a SEX TAPE because she did. I idolize Paris Hilton. My mother and sisters are wh0res like me and I am a total and utter disgrace to my dead father, who was a lawyer. Whenever my mouth is moving, I am lying as I am INCAPABLE of telling the truth about anything. I LIED about my SEX TAPE, NOT HAVING A NOSE JOB, THE TON OF BOTOX THAT I GET STUCK IN MY FACE EVERY OTHER DAY, AND ALL OF THE OTHER PLASTIC SURGERIES THAT I'VE GOTTEN TO MY FACE AND BODY OVER THE YEARS. I pretend that if I lie about things, people will eventually believe it. I was so desperate for fame that I deliberately talked my ex-boyfriend into doing a sex tape with me where he bangs me hard in my a$$ hole and pees on my plastic face. Although I pretended to be upset by the sex tape, I was the one that sent it to Vivid Entertainment, and they paid me $5 million dollars to expose my nasty self. Ray J had nothing to do with the leaked sex tape. I was the one that sent it to Vivid Entertainment. I exploit my FAKE body all of the time because I lack intelligence, class, dignity, self-respect, elegance, and morals. I am a very dirty woman and all of the men that have f@cked AND dumped me make fun of my FAKE body to everyone, including the new women in their lives. I desperately want to get married and have children, but no man with CLASS would be remotely associated with me. I even tried to put public pressure on Reggie....telling the public that we would get married. But deep down, I knew better. After Reggie would sex me, he would not call me OR answer my calls until he wanted to put his **** up my a$$ hole and pee on my face. I KNEW that Reggie was with other women, but I was too stupid to accept this fact and move on. Now, Reggie and too many men to count have dumped me! Obviously, they don’t think that I’m WORTH keeping!!!! Boy, am I a fool! I am old now and it's just so hard for me to accept the fact that everyone KNOWS that I am trash. Instead of doing something productive with my life, my family and I think that if we just talk about how rich we are or call people who tell the truth about us haters, jealous, ugly, fat, obsessed, or losers, the pain that we feel from having empty lives will go away. But it doesn't because we know that they are telling THE TRUTH about me and my sorry a$$ freakish family. In fact, the pain in my heart just gets bigger and bigger each day...especially when I look at my plastic face in the mirror, know that I am old, and see how disgusted the public is with me and my sorry a$$ self. Too many rich men have sexed me and peed on my face but NOT ONE of them think enough of me to marry me. They just want to ram my ass hole and pee on my face and leave. Even my ex, Damon Thomas has moved on to a beautiful classy woman and he has PUBLICLY called me untalented, a trashy wh0re, desperate, a plastic surgery addict, a backstabber (to my family) and a cheater. I also love to flaunt my fake a$$ because it's my calling card for any rich Black man that wants to ram my a$$ hole hard and move on! Evan Ross, Marquis Houston, Scott Storch, Fabolous, The Game, Nick Cannon, Nick Lachey, Tyson Beckford, Ray J, Reggie Bush, Christiano, Miles Austin, AND Kanye West are just a FEW of the men that have ALL f@cked, peed on, AND dumped me because they know that I am trash that brings their reputations down to the gutter with mine. The bottom line is that I am NOT worth keeping because I am unattractive, stupid, and a sl@t. I am pathetic plastic and am terribly insecure that there are tons of women in the world that are younger, beautiful, intelligent, classy, elegant, and respectable. I am none of those things, am a national joke, smell like p!ss and HAVE A TOTALLY RIPPED A$$ HOLE FROM MY A N A L SEX TAPE. Who Am I?

1224 days ago
83.

truth about kim    

WHO AM I!!!
Hey, i have been wondering where you wore!!
When i came over your fantastic story i wrote in a comment to you i thought it was brilliant and that i would copy and use it!
Thanks...!
I forgot your nick so i had no reference...
We made it a good one though :)
I like the one you did on kris to...

1224 days ago
84.

truth about kim    

Hey, i have been wondering where you wore!!
When i came over your fantastic story i wrote in a comment to you i thought it was brilliant and that i would copy and use it!
Thanks...!
I forgot your nick so i had no reference...
We made it a good one though :)
I like the one you did on kris to...

1224 days ago
85.

truth about kim    

I have been blasting it everywhere myself....This one is a great one!
Its all about spreading the truth, my friend!!
Keep on writing......me and many many more would love to read it!!
Make a blog...i will help spread the love!

1224 days ago
86.

Chun LI    

LOL @ PG and Mikey

1224 days ago
87.

jo    

OMG "truth about kim" was the best thing i have ever read on tmz! She always bitches how shes not married. men dont want to marry whores. you would think she would have figured that out by now. They screw her a few times and dump her

1224 days ago
88.

Chris O.    

"HAIR" - Jenna are you an idiot???
It's called A WEAVE, dumbassss. That woman has more hair extensions in her head than flies on fresh dog sh**.
Head full of fake hair - stop being stupid. Hollywood banks on it.
Kim is a tranny.

1224 days ago
89.

Yep I said that    

This guy is all happy cause he's poking this trollop, his buds are laughing behind his back cause they know she's been around the block a few times and he won't be the last

1224 days ago
90.

Who Am I?    

Hi Truth About Kim! It is SOOOOO GOOD TO HEAR FROM YOU!!! First of all, THANK YOU SOOOOOOOOOO MUCH for adding some things to my original post. That is EXACTLY what I want you and other posters to do! These filthy losers have GOT TO GO and I determined to spread the word about their filthiness! Truth About Kim, your post was freaking HILARIOUS!!! I literally spit my drink (lemonade) out when I read it! EXCELLENT JOB!!! Hey! Wanna hear something funny? These whores have hired someone to immediately delete any negative comments made about them on E! I guess since their ****ty show is on that network, they think it a lot of nerve for me to come in their "house" and tell the truth about them. You should read the KarTRASHian comments: "You all are just haters," or "You are just losers," and when they are really short of words, they call you fat, and poor! I WISH that I could start a blog about ending these losers once and for all! I mean, what DECENT family becomes famous because one of their family members opened her legs and showed the WORLD her genitals, gave head, got f@cked in the bum, and peed on???? These people are ****. No, I take that back. They are the **** that **** looks down on! Have a good night Truth About Kim, and KEEP UP THE EXCELLENT WORK!!!!

1223 days ago
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