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Kris Humphries

D DAY

In Kim K Divorce

8/15/2012 6:20 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
EXCLUSIVE

0814_kris_humphries_kim_kardashian_articleLawyers for Kris Humphries and Kim Kardashian will square off in court today and -- in technical legal terms -- we're told the judge will force Kris to either s**t or get off the pot.

Lawyers for both sides must tell the judge what they have done to either settle the case or prepare for trial.  As TMZ has previously reported ... Kris has refused to settle, even though he signed what we're told is an iron-clad prenup that gives him zilch in the 72-day marriage.

What makes things puzzling ... even though Kris won't settle, he hasn't prepared for trial. In fact, we know Kris' lawyers have not even taken Kim's deposition ... this, despite the fact the judge said all depos must be in the can by today's hearing.

As we previously reported, Kris' lawyers have said they want to put reality TV on trial, but it's unclear what their end game is because Kris has no damages. He made hundreds of thousands of bucks off "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" as well as the wedding special, and he signed a $24 million basketball contract -- and the notoriety that made him a celeb didn't hurt the negotiations.

Short story ... it's almost certain the judge will not screw around with the case by prolonging it. If Kris doesn't want to walk away with a clean divorce, the judge will almost certainly set the case for trial -- whether Kris and his legal team are prepared or not.

We're not so cynical to believe Kris is dragging things out because he likes the publicity.

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188 COMMENTS

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1.

Sarah    

This dude is an idiot. LET IT GO. You have a new lucrative contract & you had a GF since January. MOVE ON.

715 days ago
2.

jeff mier    

I think Kris should have to pay Kim.... every girl deserves money in a divorce she should get spousal, child support, and a monthly allowance. he ruined his marriage with any guys dream girl shes american royalty and deserves the world...she does so much charity work and donates everything she has..... while Kris used her and left her to struggle alone. Go Kim America loves you run for president!

715 days ago
3.

Bob    

I hope he gets a huge part of her money, and a massive percentage of the families future earnings. They all used him, so he should get paid for it. I think the entire Kardashian family is just out to make as much money as possible, at any cost. I NEVER hear about them doing anything for charity, which doesn't mean they aren't. They have enough money already. If they aren't just trying to rip of their fans, I think they should all commit to work just for charity for an entire year. We wouldn't see them for an entire year then.

715 days ago
4.

LDB    

Nice to know celebrities helping the poor unlike some stars who run out at restaurants when an old woman collapses onto the ground.

715 days ago
5.

Baby K    

KIM K SUPERSTAR
I am 30 years old and act like a vain and self-obsessed 13-year old. My dream was always to become a princess but i became an anal pornstar but I still think i am a princess.
My body is full of plastic surgery. My boobs, ass, lips ,teeth, cheeks, nose facelift etc. are all bought and paid for, courtesy of a plastic surgeon. If you think my hair is beautiful, is because it`s fake. I was also jealous of Paris Hilton and put out a SEX TAPE because she did. I idolized Paris Hilton. I used to hang on her like a koala bear all the time to get my picture taken by the paparazzi. Until 2007 i did cocaine. I know there are picture proofs but i will deny it forever. My Whore Mama, Kris, fu@ked the poolboy while my father was at work. The result was my pathetic half sister khloe who is a whore, just like me. Whenever my mouth is moving, I am lying as I am INCAPABLE of telling the truth about anything. I pretend that if I lie about things, people will eventually believe it. The way i walk, talk and laugh is fake and if you look into my eyes you can even see that my soul is fake. I I have no personality at all!
Although I pretended to be upset by the sex tape, I was the one that sent it to Vivid Entertainment, and they paid me $5 million dollars to expose my nasty self. Ray J had nothing to do with the leaked sex tape. I tricked him into making a porn film with me for distribution. The orgasm is off course fake because thats how they do it in cheap porn films.
My former publicist,Jonathan Jaxson, know what happened! I am just waiting for him,and many many more, to come out and reveal how i really am.
I exploit my FAKE body all of the time because I lack intelligence, class, dignity, self-respect, elegance, and morals. I am a very dirty woman.
My ex husbond damon Thomas, whom i married at the age of 19 in las vegas, publicly called me untalented, a trashy whore, desperate, a plastic surgery addict, a backstabber (to my family) and a cheater.
I have no real friends because i have misused and stepped on everybody that has come my way for fame. I am using social medias to snake my way in to other celebrities lifes for friendship and publicity. I show up like a diva to all kind of award shows that i have NO buisness at all to attend. The only award show i should attend is the AVN. I call the paparazzi myself. I have NO talent what so ever. I was thrown of dancing with the stars the second week. I made a work out video that clearly show i have never worked out in my life. I got a Razzie for my horrendous performence in disaster movie. I should have gotten one for my sextape aswell. My song JAM, i have no words for. It is the most annoying and pitiful song in history. I sing like an unmusical tone deaf 4 year old who wants a cookie from Grandma.
Anybody who dont like me, for the rotten and lying whore that i am, i call haters or jealous!
We,the kardashians, call each other dolls and have alone tainted the *****cat dolls by heisting their consept. I pretend that i care about others, but i could not care less. I only care about myself.
I tried to fu@k over children by selling them an insane debit master card with predatory’ fees.
It was unfortunatly of the market after 1 week.
But thank God, i found a new way to rip of the kids with glam silly bandz.
Over weight children must skip normal diet,exercise and do shady diet pills or lipo suction,like me.
120000$ was stolen from Sonja Norwoods creditcard.,Ray J and Brandys mother. After being busted i paid her back with the money i got from the sex tape i made with her son.
Thats the circle life, Mrs Norwood.
The clothes at Dash are pure knock offs from top brands and designers. I dont even know how to sew on a butten or sketch anything, yet i call myself a fashion designer
The logo on my perfumes is a complete rip of from Korcula creator Lindley Bertin.
For world aids day i went of social medias until my fans had raised 1mill$.
I was confident that within 12 hours i would be back. 7 days later i was bailed out by a billionaire who wanted to spare me the shame. This is how much my «fans» value and missed me.
I have never been single because i am to scared to spend time with myself. I am looking very much forward to the day my grand children sits on my lap and ask me if i am an anal pornstar because thats what everybody in kindergarten says.
I also love to flaunt my gigantic fake hippo ass because itâ??s my calling card for any rich Black man that wants to ram my @ss hard and move on! Evan Ross, Marquis Houston, Scott Storch, Fabolous, The Game, Nick Cannon, Nick Lachey, Tyson Beckford, Ray J, Reggie Bush, Christiano, Shengo (The Bodyguard is one of my favorite movies ever) Miles Austin, Gabriel Aubry (only because everybody said i was only into black guys) Kanye West and soon Kris Humpries are just a FEW of the men that have ALL fu@ked, pissed in my mouth, AND dumped me because they know that I am trash that brings their reputations down to the gutter with mine. I would fu@k ANYONE for publicity. I have had many STDs but the only one i have now is herpes, I am herpes. I am pathetic, plastic and am terribly insecure. I am the worst «rolemodel» that has ever walked this planet.
I am a national and international JOKE and gave out my own ANAL/PISS SEX TAPE to get famous. I am a human toilet. I am clearly a very sick human being and i am 100% shameless. I am the most filthy famewhore in the whole wide world!
I am Kim Kardashian Superstar…

715 days ago
6.

LDB    

Whore

715 days ago
7.

sippy    

Team Humphries, take her to trial

715 days ago
8.

cobrazombie    

She's fugly.

715 days ago
9.

Jackie    

Typical TMZ against Kris....Keep your queen media whore Kim look "good"...baw baw...pos

GO KRIS.

715 days ago
10.

who-me    

Kim Kardasihan eats **** alot.

715 days ago
11.

LK    

IM WAITING 4 THE DAY TMZ COVERS A PLANE CRASH

715 days ago
12.

H Calahan    

Dear Judge
If you read this comment, please realize that Kris is a decent man who was taken advantage of by this fame seeking she devil. He has integrity, where as she has none.

715 days ago
13.

LK    

DEAR RYAN SEACREST
PLEASE 4 THE LOVE OF GOD TAKE A LOSS & PULL THERE SHOW DO THE WORLD A FAVOR U MADE THEM & URSELF ENOUGH $ MOVE ON 2 THE NXT BIZ VENTURE NO MORE KIM $ HER CLAN STOP FUDGING THE RATINGS & PUT SOME OTHER SHOWS ON IN THERE TIME SLOTS PLS & THKS FM THE PPL

715 days ago
14.

Bob    

I want to be famous too. Seeking volunteers to make a "hidden" sex tape that I can sell to gain notoriety (good or bad, it doesn't matter). My family is nice, but I'm sure I can convince them to act like idiots for money if the camera start rolling. My rear end is pretty big already, but I'm willing to get some injections to make it larger if it will guarantee some more gullible fans that throw money at me.If I meet someone today, maybe we could get married by Friday and then I could be single again before the new year.

715 days ago
15.

BB not bb    

All Kris wants to do is compete with Kim. Maybe he thought that he would have a chance to get to her because the girlfriend he dumped for her was very similar to Kim. He doesn't have a leg to stand on in competeing with Kim in anything other than basketball. He has been on her case since day one, saying she is mean and selfish and this and that. He is trying to say she is fake so she owes him money, but he is the one who is fake with this baseless lawsuit.


His side knows there is nothing to prepare, they are just trying to psych Kim out with the idea of it. They are playing with a half a tank of brain cells, while she is from a family of legal and bunsiness geniuses. They are really just trying to use her soft heart agaisnt her.


Kris will likely lose at this like he lost at the marriage. When his stardom wears off from being in Kim's spoltlight, maybe that will be the end of his basketball notoriety as well.


He is not even using a real divorce lawyer, the lawyer isn't even from the area, and the lawyer has done no work on the case to give the judge. It seems like the whole case is just scare tactics, like what retards use to compete with smarter people to gain an edge. Brain cell for brain cell, he just doesn't stack up.

715 days ago
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