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A-Hole Pinched in Toilet Paper Attack

10/15/2010 11:15 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

The only thing worse than running out of toilet paper ... is when some butthole throws a roll at your head -- this according to a custodian who claims he's the victim of a vicious TP assault.


Cops in Massachusetts claim the accused asswipe -- 55-year-old Allen Kerner -- will be summoned to court to face an assault and battery charge for allegedly firing a roll of TP at a town hall cleaning man because he was upset that the janitor was whistling on the job.  

The custodian told cops he was simply trying to replenish the TP stock ... and didn't realize anyone was in the can.

According to the janitor, the TP bandit tried to flee the scene after the attack ... but the custodian pursued him and Kerner was ultimately apprehended by police.

Talk about an irritable bowel.


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that is what you call a mass

1471 days ago


2 ply or 1 ply? Yes, it matters.

1471 days ago


How is this any news whatsoever?!? The guy will get a small fine in court (most likely just court costs). The shocking part is that someone actually called the police on him.

1471 days ago

Ms. X    

Good one...Horse with no name! Lol

1471 days ago


I have no idea why this is celebrity news, either, but more importantly, the justice system is a joke if they're going to waste a single dollar/minute of anyone's time with something like this. You couldn't hurt someone with a roll of toilet paper no matter what you did with it.

1471 days ago

Prince Eugene von Saxe-Coburg-Gotha    

The first A-Hole story ever on TMZ not to be about Prince Frederic! What exactly is going on here?

1471 days ago


And in more " breaking news", Alicia Keys gives birth to her baby........

Posted at 9:55 AM on Oct 15, 2010 by sharon


who cares next thing you know its sunday

1467 days ago
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