Tanning Mom -- Topless Bikini MELTDOWN!

The environmental effects wreaked on the ecosystem are still unknown after a somewhat pale Tanning Mom aka Patricia Krentcil attempted to bronze her luscious droopy topless flesh, balloon knot belly button and tatted up vadge in an unfortunate silver bikini on a quarantined New Jersey beach yesterday.

Since getting off the hook for allegedly bringing her 5-year-old into a tanning booth, Patty -- who says she's 45 years old -- is now choosing to shrivel up like a raisin with the help of the natural sun.

To avoid damage, protective eyewear should be worn at all times.