Kate Middleton Royal Baby REVEALED BOW DOWN BEFORE ME, PUNY MORTALS

7/23/2013 11:27 AM PDT
Breaking News

Here it is ... THE ROYAL BABY ... 's head ... and fingers ... so everyone can go back to their lives. Please.

Kate Middleton and Prince William debuted their infant overlord moments ago in London -- the third in line for the British throne -- and guess what? The kid is totally normal. Hooray.


Still no word on the name, but at least we know the kid actually exists -- unless it's a decoy baby and Kate Middleton was never really pregnant to begin with.

Now that would be a real story. Not that this isn't a real story.