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Mel to Oksana -- 'I Could Commit a Crime'

9/22/2010 10:30 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Mel Gibson wrote a frantic, rambling letter to Oksana Grigorieva a year before their infamous, January blowout -- in which he describes feeling so out of control that he "could drink or commit a crime."

Mel Gibson Letter

TMZ has obtained a copy of the letter -- handwritten by Mel -- and in it he says, "I'm so ragged I could drink or commit a crime. The anger seems to be out of my control -- I need to do something about it something lasting -- not just a band aid."

In the undated letter -- which sources connected to the case tell TMZ was written in December 2008 -- he says, "I don't know why I'm so whacky and depressed but I need to get well and re-enter life.  Please don't be upset I've gone -- I'm just not myself and feel bad when I am so f**ked up and sick around you."

Mel goes on:  "I don't want to inflict this unhealthy version of myself on you."

Mel theorizes, "Maybe it's some kind of male menopause -- or Brian's s**t."  We're told Brian is Mel's holistic doctor.

In the letter, Mel repeatedly tells Oksana, "I love you" and says, "...this isn't who I was meant to be -- I know it!  I'm scared I can't get back."

816 COMMENTS

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91.

igotfleasfromtmz    

Mel...stay strong. Oksana and her dream team of attorneys, including attorneys past, present, or future, have not been able to get what they want out of you. Stand strong. You are winning. The public still loves you, and I for one, cannot wait for your new movie! Keep the pressure on Oksana. Your own attorneys are doing an outstanding job. I know it doesn't look like it now, but for attorneys to resort to such low tactics spells desperation.

Posted at 3:41 AM on Sep 22, 2010 by fuddyduddy
Take all your anger Mel and channel it one way through your attorney's. Your a WINNER!

1456 days ago
92.

shirleyholmes    

Good morning Genna

1456 days ago
93.

fuddyduddy    

What man in his right man will involve himself with this woman?

OMG--can you imagine how paranoid some man will be? Well, is she recording me? Ummm....I'd better not write anything down. Better not send emails or text either. LOL!

1456 days ago
94.

igotfleasfromtmz    

I feel Mel liked Violet who is natural a whole lot more.

1456 days ago
95.

shirleyholmes    

This part of lyrics is from Pink Floyd / The Wall / The trial


The evidence before the court is incontravertible.
There's no need for the jury to retire.
In all my years of judging I have never heard before,
Of someone more deserving of the full penalty of the law.

1456 days ago
96.

Who'sThat    

What kind of man beats up a baby in her mother's arms? Mel Pigson is a piece of ****ing ****; she should NEVER be allowed to have children again. Hang him from the gallows.

Posted at 2:04 AM on Sep 22, 2010 by ProudAmerican

OKsana, stop your lying...you are only hurting yourself, making yourself look worse than before if that was possible! why don't you go take care of your children if you are only thinking of them as you have said...whatever you are doing in this PR WAR/ Damage control/ w/e is not going to work...you are a sick sick woman...you need help...no wonder you have to take 30 pills/day! stop your pathetic behavior...

i think you are the one about to have a nervous breakdown!

BTW..YOU ARE NOT AN AMERICAN CITIZEN...please go back to wherever you have your citizenship ie. Russia or UK...wherever...not sure if they want you back though...

1456 days ago
97.

Genna    

Here is a woman who deliberately tried to destroy Mel Gibson in public by waging a hideous PR campaign against him, to try to extort money from him, and gain public sympathy t sell her CD's. This is the same woman who lied to Judge Gordon who stated to OG’s attorneys that her claims were “disingenuous at best.” Poor, poor misunderstood Oksana. LOL!

1456 days ago
98.

shirleyholmes    

@ Who'sThat

Who would possible want her now?

1456 days ago
99.

Who'sThat    

And while she was wearing his child under her heart he was quietly banging around with a young Polish porn Star, very quiet he tried to keep it & then it was revealed to the world just before Oksana was expected to sign an agreement to keep silent ever after.

Mel is a tough guy, he pays to make people obey, but Oksana didn't obey this time, I believe he hurt her too deep.

She may have been stupid & mean, but he was absolutely no gentleman either.
Posted at 3:36 AM on Sep 22, 2010 by Sorntolc

Child = mealticket

Banging Polish Porn Star = now with mealticket cooking in her oven, she shut Mel off in a heartbeat b/c all she wants is his money, not him or his affection.

Signing agreement to shut up Oink = At the time, Mel was giving in to her extortion

Oksana didn't obey this time, I believe he hurt her too deep = reverse that she hurt him. Easy enough since she never loved him.

She may have been stupid & mean = okay you got something right


but he was absolutely no gentleman either = she doesn't deserve a gentleman anyway

Posted at 3:43 AM on Sep 22, 2010 by Catnip

@Catnip

i was getting ready to respond to Sorn but you beat me to it...and...might i add, you did a fine fine job! :)

1456 days ago
100.

shirleyholmes    

@ Who's That

O, I know: Sorntolc will have her, that is Denmark, right?

1456 days ago
101.

Genna    

Well...I have to get ready for work, and my ""boring life." (Lol.)

Take care everyone.

Shell...good luck today...I know you will do very well!

1456 days ago
102.

A. Conda    

These "revelations" aired in public are pretty ugly. Obviously this is a very big, expensive campaign to alter public opinion of a movie star so that the mother can get what she wants. If he wasn't a movie star, this would not be necessary. But this might also impact Mel's future earnings and his ability to continue to pay her the big money she wants in the future.

1456 days ago
103.

shirleyholmes    

Bye Genna

Take Care

1456 days ago
104.

Who'sThat    

@ Who'sThat

Who would possible want her now?

Posted at 3:51 AM on Sep 22, 2010 by shirleyholmes

she needs to find a deserted island, find some natives of the land with no modern conveniences, ie. TV or radio or PC, to try to convince them she is the Goddess of the land to bring them good fortune...continuing her lying, scheming ways...she just can't change...

...little did she know, these natives were cannibals who like their meat very very rare!

1456 days ago
105.

barnswella    

OG was probably drugging him.

Here you have what you know to be a vulnerable man going through crap in his life and you set out to destroy him further by releasing tapes of his outburst and on top of that claim domestic abuse, just because he didn't give you enough money for Botox injections?

That OG is a MONSTER. Not to hard to see through all the evidence what he is, and what she is.

1456 days ago
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