Jon Stewart Says Mets Won't Sign Bryce Harper Because They Suck Too Much

Jon Stewart REALLY wants the Mets to be good -- and REALLY wants 'em to sign Bryce Harper -- but he's also been around long enough to know they'll bungle it.

"There's no way Bryce Harper is coming to the Mets," Stewart told us in NYC ... "It's not possible!"

Harper is reportedly looking for a MASSIVE new contract (some say $400 MIL) with his eye on several teams. But Stewart says fellow Mets fans shouldn't hold their breath.

"I'm sure they just signed a 14-year-old they're sure is going to be the next Bryce Harper," Stewart says ... "but is gonna turn out to be just another asthmatic with a bat."

Jon is one of New York's most famous die-hards ... but back-to-back seasons of fewer than 80 wins have him feelin' pretty down on the Mets these days.

Still, Jon says he's holding out a scintilla of hope ... because a strong left-handed batter would be DOPE!