Paul Nassif My Boys Need A MOTHER

9/26/2012 1:00 AM PDT

Paul Nassif -- My Kids Need a Mother

Adrienne Maloof has accused Paul Nassif of brutalizing their 3 boys  ... and even though the Department of Children and Family Services has determined the allegations are bogus, Paul still wants Adrienne to be a big part of the kids' lives.

Paul's position is especially stunning, given that Adrienne got a court order last week prohibiting him from even seeing the boys.  We broke the story ... Paul is going to court this morning to get that order lifted, but he's telling friends he will not hurt the kids to spite his estranged wife.  Paul says his kids need a mom and a dad, so he will ask for a temporary joint custody order.

Paul says, "I just want this crap to stop.  We need to be co-parents, no matter how we feel about each other."

There are limits, however, to Paul's tolerance.  He'll ask the judge today for an order sanctioning Adrienne for falsely accusing him of child abuse.

As we first reported, the Department of Children and Family Services has written a report saying the child abuse allegations against Paul are "unfounded" ... calling into question a report by psychiatrist Charles Sophy, who concluded Paul hit the boys.