Ryan Lochte's Estranged Wife Says Swim Coach Gig Is Bad For Their Kids, He Denies

Ryan Lochte and his estranged wife have found something else they disagree on ... his upcoming coaching job with a college swim team.

The decorated Olympic swimmer recently announced he's taking a job at Missouri State University ... a move Kayla Reid Lochte thinks will be challenging for their three young children, who are staying behind with her in Gainesville, Florida.

Sources close to Kayla Reid tell TMZ … her main concern has always been the emotional well-being and stability of the children and it’s heartbreaking anytime young kids are faced with the reality of seeing a parent less often, especially at their age when they don’t fully understand distance or what a long-distance parenting schedule truly looks like long term.

The Missouri State campus is about a 15-hour drive from Gainesville ... and Ryan tell us, "I will be back every single month to see my kids." He also says he'll visit them on breaks, holidays, and summers.

Our source tell us the children have been informed about their father's move, but they are still very young and don’t fully grasp what seeing a parent one weekend a month or primarily during summers and holidays realistically means yet.

We're told Kayla’s trying to approach everything with grace and maturity ... and she's focused on coparenting respectfully and keeping the children’s needs first rather than creating more public conflict.

Our sources say Kayla does NOT have plans to move to Missouri ... mainly because the kids are already established in Gainesville and in the school system there.

Ryan is explaining more about his desire to get into coaching, and taking a job at Missouri State ... telling us, "Gainesville hates me." He also says the town hates his current girlfriend, Molly Gillihan, and "we are shunned here by the constant bullying and harassment we get on a daily basis from my ex."

For her part, sources close to Kayla say she has no interest in tearing Ryan down publicly and genuinely wants everyone to heal and move forward in a healthy way.

Still, Ryan says the last year has been exhausting ... Kayla filed for divorce in June and Ryan says Molly lost her job due to Kayla and her friends allegedly calling her work and saying she was sleeping with a married man. He's denied getting with her before the divorce.

Ryan says he offered Kayla the family home in Gainesville, everything in it, and $25,000 if she would let the kids move with him to Missouri ... but it sounds like the offer wasn't accepted.

The way Ryan tells it ... living in Gainesville was "no longer healthy or feasible" for him ... and he feels the healthiest and strongest he's ever been in his life now that he's with Molly and not Kayla.