This is not a trick, Michael -- "Arrested Development" star Will Arnett has officially filed for divorce from Amy Poehler ... nearly two years after the couple separated.
According to court documents, Arnett wants joint legal and physical custody of their two sons aged 5 and 3. He also wants visitation.
43-year-old Arnett and 42--year-old Poehler got married in 2003.
Since they separated, Arnett has reportedly been dating Billy Joel's ex-wife Katie Lee and Poehler has been linked to comedian Nick Kroll.
This is Arnett's second divorce and Poehler's first.
I Don't Want to Drug Test My Son ...
I HAVE TO!
4/16/2014 1:30 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Todd Chrisley isn't joking around on his reality show "Chrisley Knows Best" -- he really does drug test his son ... calling it "a necessity."
Our photog in New York City caught up with Chrisley and the rest of the family, where we picked his brain on good parenting ... and what he thinks is the biggest problem facing kids today.
Chrisley has said on his show he's spent a million bucks on rehab facilities for his 23-year-old son Kyle ... but now tells us why Kyle has to be drug tested weekly.
Watch our clip ... Todd makes it clear the testing's not just for cameras.
I'm Going to the Hospital
And Bruce is By My Side
4/16/2014 10:02 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Kris Jenner has a medical problem that required her to go to the hospital, and even though they're separated when times get tough her go-to person is still Bruce.
We've learned Kris just went to a hospital in Thousand Oaks -- near her home -- for X-rays and possible tests for an undisclosed medical problem. She was accompanied by Bruce, who we believe came from his home in Malibu to be with her.
Kris and Bruce have actually become closer we're told since their separation, because there's no tension over the relationship anymore -- they're simply close friends and confidantes.
Again ... it's unclear why Kris needed to go the hospital.
Hires Round-the-Clock Security
After Stalker Makes Stink
4/16/2014 12:20 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Kris Jenner's taking no chances after Kim Kardashian came face-to-face with a stinky stalker outside the Jenner home last month -- Kris has now hired 24/7 security.
Kardashian sources tell TMZ, guards are parked outside the family home in 2 vehicles which monitor her Hidden Hills estate 24 hours a day -- and the guards are ARMED.
We're told she's paying several thousand bucks a month for the hired muscle.
Kris has had her share of scares over the last year -- threatening phone calls, paparazzi intruders, SWAT pranks -- but the stinker was the last straw.
TMZ broke the story, the 20-year-old man was taken into custody after allegedly sneaking onto Kris' property. Kim called security, who then alerted police. We're told the kid claimed he was Kendall Jenner's boyfriend and Justin Bieber's stepbrother. Oh yeah, and he smelled like death.
'Southern Charm' Star
I Gave Birth (For Real)
To My Co-Star's Baby
4/15/2014 12:04 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
So much for reality television ... the 21-year-old star of "Southern Charm" who had a pregnancy scare on the show -- but said her test came back negative -- just had a baby.
Sources close to the show tell us Kathryn Dennis gave birth to a healthy baby girl 2 weeks ago -- the very day the pregnancy-scare episode aired on Bravo. And the baby daddy is her mega-rich 50-year-old co-star Thomas Ravenel.
The hookup between Kathryn and Ravenel was one of the big storylines on the show ... but at the time, pregnancy tests showed Kathryn was NOT pregnant.
But after filming ended, we're told Kathryn and Ravenel began shacking up in Palm Beach, FL -- where they now live as a couple -- and Kathryn got pregnant for real.
Fun Fact: Ravenel is a former treasurer of South Carolina who was was forced to resign and served 8 months in prison ... after he was convicted in 2007 of cocaine distribution.
Debbie Rowe is CRAZY
MJ Would Be NOBODY Without the Jackson 5
4/15/2014 1:00 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Jermaine Jackson is reeling over Debbie Rowe's comment that Michael Jackson told her his brothers were talentless .... saying Michael owes his fame to his older siblings.
Jermaine was blunt in Calabasas Monday, telling TMZ, "If it wasn't for the Jackson 5 there would be no Michael Jackson," adding, "That's what gave him the launching pad to become what he became."
You have to watch the whole video. It's shocking.
Jermaine also addresses Debbie's claims he's using MJ's kids to mooch off the estate.
Jermaine suggests he doesn't need the MJ estate's money because he made a fortune with the Jackson 5 -- tell that to the baby mama who's been hunting him down for child support for years.
Hilary Duff & Mike Comrie
Do They Look Separated to You?
4/14/2014 9:14 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Hilary Duff and Mike Comrie don't look like people that recently separated ... instead, they were hanging together at Coachella this weekend looking every bit the married couple.
Duff and her NHL player hubby announced their separation back in January, but still managed to take a family vacation together over Valentine's Day (see below).
Perhaps this relationship isn't over until the divorce attorney sings.
Johnny Weir, Victor Voronov
But Only If Johnny ...
4/14/2014 1:00 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Clear the mantle ... the Faberge Eggs are coming home, because TMZ has learned Johnny Weir's super-nasty divorce to Victor Voronov is off ... but there are strings attached.
TMZ broke the story ... Johnny blindsided Victor with divorce papers last month and things turned immediately ugly with each accusing the other of heinous conduct.
Now multiple sources connected to the couple tell TMZ ... over the weekend Victor and Johnny agreed to reconcile and Johnny plans to move back into the family homestead today. He was in L.A. shooting a show over the weekend.
Now the strings ... we're told Victor wants Johnny to sign a document agreeing to publicly apologize for all the nasty things he said about Victor. Johnny must also agree in writing that he will no longer let his mother meddle in the marriage ... and she has to keep her nose out of their finances.
We're told they were squabbling Sunday over the document ... what a shock.
Selena Gomez' Parents
BLINDSIDED By Firing
4/14/2014 12:45 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Selena Gomez's mom claims she got ZERO warning that the singer was axing her as her manager ... until TMZ broke the story.
Selena's mom Mandy Teefey says she and Selena's stepdad sat down with the singer Thursday after TMZ's story ... and asked Selena if she was absolutely sure she wanted to move in a different direction. Selena said yes.
Mandy tells us she thought last month's conversation was just talk ... and she's having a hard time processing the fact that she's no longer Selena's manager.
Selena's mom and stepdad had managed the 21-year-old since her big break at Disney -- but as we reported, Selena told her parents she'd outgrown them and wanted bigger management.
Mandy says she respects her daughter's decision ... and plans to continue producing several movie projects with Selena, including the upcoming "The Sky Is Everywhere."
I'm the One Scared
for My Life Now!
4/13/2014 12:35 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Michael Des Barres played master assassin Murdoc for several years on "MacGyver," but now he's afraid for real because of threats to kill him and his family.
Des Barres began receiving messages on Facebook last November from a fan who claimed to be sick. Des Barres engaged in "short positive responses wishing her well" ... but the messages got disturbing ... this according to a search warrant obtained by TMZ.
The docs also show that Des Barres eventually blocked the fan ... but the fan began creating new accounts and sending even more disturbing messages, including:
-- "I'm going to cut your throat a**hole!"
-- "They're going to f*****g kill you, you are all f****d, your all in danger your ex, parents and child."
-- "Your dead f****r, People will never stop harassing you and I'll cut off your d***.
One message contained a photo of a person who had shot himself in the head.
The Threat Management Unit of the LAPD got the warrant to search records from Twitter and Facebook ... to find the culprit.
Using Wealth To Dodge Daddy Duties
Claims Baby Mama
4/12/2014 12:45 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Luis Miguel has dodged his responsibility to his kids by hiding behind gates and bodyguards ... playing a cruel game of catch me if you can with his flesh and blood ... according to his baby mama.
Aracely Arambula filed legal docs -- obtained by TMZ -- in what has become a 2-year ordeal to serve him with legal docs in their child support war.
Arambula -- a Mexican soap opera star -- claims Miguel is like the Road Runner ... gleefully dodging process servers, most notably in front of a TMZ camera at a 2013 California county fair. Luis claims service wasn't legal, because the guy never came face-to-face with him.
Arambula says she was given an anemic offer of $15K a month in child support for their 2 kids -- ages 5 and 7 -- yet in 2009-10, she says he raked in $24 MILLION for his concert tour alone.
She wants $60K a month minimum, but he went radio silent last year and now he says he's moved from California to Florida so she has no legal right anymore to drag him to court.
Arambula outlines the lengths to which she's tried serving him, only to be thwarted by Luis' massive gates protecting his Bel Air home.
Luis wants the case dismissed because he was never properly served. She's saying he's a terrible dad for using that excuse not to support their kids.
Debbie Rowe Already Abandoned Her Kids Once
4/11/2014 1:12 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Michael Jackson's brothers are refusing to allow Debbie Rowe to wrestle guardianship of Prince and Paris from the kids' grandma -- at least if they can help it -- telling TMZ, Debbie abandoned her kids for cash after they were born ... and hasn't cared about them since.
Tito, Randy, Jermaine, and Jackie tell us, "[The children] are well loved and well taken care of. We are quite taken back [sic] that Ms. Rowe has decided now to enter their lives, after she abandoned her children many years ago for money."
The brothers are referring to Debbie agreeing to give MJ full custody of Prince and Paris after giving birth to them ... in exchange for a lump sum of money.
The brothers insist the Jackson family -- Katherine included -- wants only the best for Prince and Paris, adding, "Our only desire is to see our niece and nephews continue to go on with happy, healthy and safe lives. We will do everything and anything with in our power to help make that happen."
As we reported, Rowe will file legal docs asking the judge to appoint her guardian so she can move the children to her ranch in Palmdale CA, where she has a business raising and breeding horses.
I'm Going to Court
To Get Michael Jackson's Kids
4/11/2014 1:00 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Debbie Rowe will wage legal war to get guardianship of the 2 kids she had with Michael Jackson ... and if she could she'd gladly take all 3.
Sources familiar with the situation tell TMZ ... Rowe is deeply concerned about the environment in the Jackson home. She likes Katherine Jackson but believes she has gotten way too old to serve as guardian ... "Katherine's not connected with the kids or involved in their lives" Rowe told a friend.
Rowe is also concerned Michael's brothers are hanging around the Calabasas house a lot and have been a terrible influence. She's complained Prince has developed a filthy mouth and is rebellious because no one is even trying to keep him in line.
Rowe is especially upset with Jermaine, who will appear on "Celebrity Wife Swap." Rowe thinks he's just plain creepy and extremely inappropriate, and wants him as far away from the kids as possible.
She feels Blanket --- the 12-year-old who is not her biological kid -- is actually the most vulnerable and most in danger.
As for Paris ... Rowe fears she's not made the kind of improvement which is necessary after her suicide attempt and wants control so she can take steps to ensure her safety.
TJ Jackson is a co-guardian ... we're told Rowe likes him but is worried that he's been on tour and away from the kids for long stretches.
Rowe will file legal docs asking the judge to appoint her guardian so she can move the children to her ranch in Palmdale CA, where she has a business raising and breeding horses.
Fact is ... Rowe has not asked the Estate for money and our sources say she's not interested in a payday. She wants the kids because she loves them and fears for their well-being.