Becks & Posh

"He will practice, but he is not going to play," coach Fabio Capello tells the New York Post. "A player who has such a major contract with another team ... we cannot count on him."

With all that free time, Becks can daydream about what kind of digs that new $250 million contract can buy him in the States. Of course, it'll be hard to top their $13.6 million home in England – referred to as "Beckingham Palace" – which features a $40,000 treehouse and $252,000 fort for their kids.

Apparently, Britney's worn out her welcome at her regular Hollywood haunts. The party girl and her new boy toy, Isaac Cohen, are now making the rounds at West Hollywood's gay clubs. According to Perez Hilton, they hit The Lounge in Tigerheat on Thursday, and then were seen at The Abbey the next night. In between her two nights out, Brit was able to pencil in her kids. On Friday, the disheveled party mom was seen playing with them in a park.

It seems that no one's safe from Donald Trump's wrath -- not even Secretary of State Condi Rice. According to the New York Daily News, Trump says: "She goes on a plane, she gets off a plane, she waves, she goes there to meet some dictator. They talk, she leaves, she waves, the plane takes off. Nothing happens, it's a joke, nothing ever happens. I think she's a very nice woman, but I don't want a nice woman. I want someone that's not necessarily nice." Who is Trump's kind of woman? Senator Hillary Clinton, who he calls "very capable."

After filming an appearance on David Letterman in New York, Madonna was caught in a high-speed chase. Perez Hilton reports that two vehicles tried to run the Material Girl off the road, and her driver was blowing red lights all the way down Fifth Avenue. The pop star even called 911, but she was able to shake the stalkers off her tail before the cops got there.

Lucy Lawless, aka "Xena: Warrior Princess," caught the singing bug after appearing on the reality show "Celebrity Duets." She performed a sold-out show at the Roxy in L.A. ... Andy Warhol's Long Island, N.Y. estate has been sold. The Montauk property was bought by Millard Drexler, CEO of J. Crew, for an undisclosed amount. ... Johnny Depp is planning to make a film based on the former Russian spy who was poisoned last year. It is one of three possible films that will be made about the case.

Now that Scientology's biggest cheerleader has lured David Beckham to L.A., Tom Cruise is setting his sights on Becks' wife, Victoria.

The New York Daily News reports that with a little coaxing from TomKat, the Beckhams might become Scientology's next celebrity converts. Apparently, Posh has eagerly accepted church literature from Tom and Katie, and she'll be playing an alien in "The Thetan," a movie backed by Cruise that's based on his religious beliefs.

Apparently, Victoria's new BFFs have made it their mission to help the former Spice Girl become a household name in the States. Katie is trying to line up meetings with Hollywood movers and shakers like Steven Spielberg. TomKat is undoubtedly feeding status-hungry Posh lines about how joining Scientology will help boost her profile.

While Britney's out making enemies, it looks like Kevin Federline has gained an ally – albeit a weird one. According to Page Six, schlock director John Waters came to K-Fed's defense by saying: "You don't see him out there getting out of limousines and flashing his shaved crotch. What did he do that was so wrong? [Britney] is the idiot. She's the one who gave him the Ferrari."

Could this be the start of a budding friendship? Waters is known for using has-beens and wannabes in his films. And Kevin definitely fits the bill. He will make fun of himself in a Super Bowl commercial for an as-yet-undisclosed company. A source says that in the ad, K-fed pokes fun of his "loser reputation" in an attempt to "change the public's terrible image of him."

Donald Trump just doesn't know when to give up. The publicity monger unexpectedly dropped in on Opie and Anthony's XM Satellite Radio show, claiming he wanted to end his feud with Rosie O'Donnell. Then he proceeded to launch into a tirade about "The View" host, and told a story about how she came to one of his weddings and "ate plenty." When will it end?

David Beckham got a little support from pocket pal Tom Cruise.

At a presser today, the soccer stud said he phoned his wee BFF the other night to ask for advice about the paparazzi. "He's a very wise man and a very good friend of mine," said Beckham of Cruise, "and to have his experience and have him explain some things to me to be prepared for, that's going to be a big help."

Beck could have just watched how Tom handled Matt Lauer.

In the wake of Beckham joining the Los Angeles Galaxy, sources inside Major League Soccer tell TMZ that, among other players, Brazilian soccer superstar Ronaldo could be the next player joining Becks in America.

As TMZ reported yesterday, Beckham is moving to Los Angeles to play for the L.A. Galaxy -- for a record breaking salary of a $50 million a year for five years (for a total of $250 million). Sources say that New York could be the site of Ronaldo's landing, adding that NY's infatuation with celebrity athletes makes it the perfect place for him.

As for Ronaldo himself, sports insiders say his impact, while big, will be nowhere near that of Beckham's. Ronaldo, while talented on the field, does not have the same charm and charisma that Becks does. Charm and charisma... yeah that's it.

TMZ did some number-crunching, and that's a lot of money by any measure, but especially so when you consider that's almost more than the other 200-plus players in the league will make next year -- combined. His yearly take -- about $50 million -- would be more than five major league baseball teams' entire salary load for 2006, and more than at least one NHL team. Even Michael Jordan, who played his last season in '98 for the Chicago Bulls at the then-astronomical salary of $30 million, doesn't come close.

Anschutz Entertainment Group, owners of the L.A. Galaxy, is shelling out most of Beckham's package. They report that since this morning's announcement, they've already sold 1,000 season tickets. We're also told that Major League Soccer thinks it'll sell out Galaxy tickets for the season -- in just 30 days.

While Victoria Beckham is busy pissing off photographers and spreading bad fashion, her Spice Girls cohort, Geri Halliwell, is busy trying to save the world.

The artist formerly known as Ginger Spice visited Zambia in November with the United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA) to raise awareness of the country's HIV pandemic. Halliwell has been a Goodwill Ambassador for the UNFPA since leaving the Girl Power-ed group in 1999.

Beckham, on the other hand, recently made headlines for appearing emaciated, attending the TomKat wedding, and starting a fight with photo agencies. Tosh, Posh.

The end of days is here... well, at least the end of Katie Holmes' days as a free woman.

Today is the day Tom and Katie get married - finally - and the A-list guest-listers are going all out for the lavish ceremony. While guests like Will Smith, wife Jada Pinkett Smith and Brooke Shields looked classy and gave their well wishes to the couple as they left their hotel for the wedding, Victoria Beckham turned the paparazzi crush into the "Posh Show."

The former Spice Girl exited the Hassler Hotel with what can only be described as an oversized black plate wedged precariously on her head, posing for photos and turning the entranceway of the hotel into a fashion show.

With other guests like J. Lo, Richard Gere and Jenna Elfman in attendance, it sure sucks for them if they were sitting behind Beckham!

And in case you're wondering -- Cruise and Holmes have tied and knot and are officially husband and wife, their rep confirms to PEOPLE.

Supermodel Kate Moss has been named the most influential celebrity in the world, beating out megastars like Madonna and even Brad and Angelina!

British experts analyzed how many times a star is mentioned in the media, magazine covers, and entries on Google.com to come up with the power list.

Everyone's favorite born-again Brit Madonna came in at #2, with soccer stud David Beckham in third. Angelina edged out her real-life paramour, Brad Pitt, by one spot to come in at #5.

Katie Holmes and her new BFF Victoria Beckham stormed the Karl Lagerfeld show at Paris Fashion Week yesterday, setting off a photog frenzy.

For the future Mrs. Cruise, going to Paris marked a return to where Tom proposed to her. While Cruise was nowhere in sight, Holmes was ecstatic to be back. "It's really fun, we're having a great time here in Paris ... it's been so wonderful, so romantic."

Though Tom's reportedly been concerned about Katie's body lately, the former girl from the "Creek" looked great on her way to the show. Cruise and Holmes are reportedly set to walk down the aisle in the fall.

Former Spice Girl and Current Mrs. Hottest Soccer Player in the World, Victoria Beckham, has been developing a TV fashion show with her manager Simon Fuller.

The BBC reports that Fuller, one of the masterminds responsible for the hit shows "Pop Idol" and "American Idol," says, "It will be more serious than a reality show but will still be entertaining because Victoria is so funny." We knew Victoria had been modeling and creating a fashion line, but who knew Mrs. Beckham had a funny bone.

Beckham isn't the only former Spice Girl who is getting the Simon Fuller TV treatment. The super-manager is also planning a sitcom for Emma Bunton, aka Baby Spice.

TMZ is eagerly awaiting a very special Beckham Fashion where Victoria and David do each others hair. That's true love.