Kyle Richards Says Life Without Mauricio Umansky is 'Painful'

Kyle Richards & Mauricio Umansky's separation hasn't been easy on the couple ... in fact, not being with Mauricio has been "scary" for Kyle -- at least according to her.

The 'Real Housewives' star stopped by SiriusXM's "Jeff Lewis Live" Thursday and discussed her messy estrangement from her hubby of almost three decades ... and she admitted she's not totally sure who she is outside of that marriage.

KR said she feels her "entire identity is being a wife and a mom," and she's trying to figure out who she is outside of that -- all while still dealing with feelings of compassion toward MU.

Kyle said it would almost be easier to hate Mauricio if she straight-up couldn't stand being around him ... but, quite frankly she doesn't -- and it's making their split that much harder ... sounds like she's still quite fond of him.

She went on to say they're making the best of their situation ... living in the same house, sleeping in different bedrooms -- and it helps that they've got other homes too though they aren't actively trying to be in different places.

Remember, we told you all about their Aspen excursions last month with Umansky photographing a couple lovely models wearing just towels on the slopes and ripping his shirt off in a poppin' bar ... before he, Kyle and their daughters hung out around Christmas.

Richards said the trip was pretty tame ... adding if you didn't know the former couple, then you wouldn't think anything was amiss in their relationship -- bottom line, no blow-ups over the Christmas ham.

Some people have theorized the couple's staying together to avoid splitting up their assets in a messy divorce ... but Richards threw cold water on that idea during the interview -- saying she'd get divorced if she was totally sure they weren't going to be together anymore.

As for the money, Kyle's very clear ... it's collective cash! She said they were totally broke when they started dating and got married -- so, all their success like The Agency taking off and the big Bravo bucks they made on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" would be split evenly.

The couple decided to go their separate ways last summer, and their breakup's been plagued with rumors of Kyle moving on with Morgan Wade quickly after the split and Mauricio getting it on with his "Dancing with the Stars" partner Emma Slater ... basically, everyone's been up in their business over the last six months.

It seems KR's finally ready to talk about it all -- Mauricio and Morgan included -- telling us earlier this week she's gonna spill her guts ... when cameras start rolling on the 'RHOBH" reunion. That's one hell of a promo, Kyle!

The reunion tapes today, so fans won't have to wait much longer for all the answers they've been craving.