Tiger Woods' Ex-Wife Thanks Homewreckers ... For My Baller New Mansion

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Elin Nordegren is putting the finishing touches on her Florida mega-mansion -- and it would never have been possible if Tiger's wang wasn't touching all those skanks back in the day.

See, they were good for something after all.

Rihanna Buns Up in Greece A Pose So Hot, You'd ...

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Rihanna's sexy vacation pics sent our minds off to the magical Land of Hypotheticals -- where you can ponder just how much danger you'd expose yourself to ... in order to get with RiRi.

Of course we'd never have a shot in hell of being near her -- so this game's all we got.

Pauly D Inside the Baby-Making Party A Vegas (Non) Love Story

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One day Pauly D will tell his daughter the heartwarming story about that time he had a drunken, condom-less one night stand in Las Vegas ... with her mom.

Ok, maybe not so heartwarming.

Kim Kardashian NAILED Her Engagement Surprise

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Kim Kardashian totally knew Kanye West was going to pop the question -- and how do WE know? Because the evidence is written all over her ... fingernails?

Hey ... it's a theory, people!

'Bachelor' Hottie 2 Cheeks Up On Her Competition

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"The Bachelor" contestant Nikki Ferrell is doing everything she can to convince Juan Pablo Galavis she's THE ONE by flaunting her perfect 10 bikini bod.

Great tactic, Nikki! It's working ... on most of us, anyway.

Kim & Kanye Go for Broke With Engagement Surprise

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Kanye West went over the top for his marriage proposal to Kim Kardashian -- renting out a stadium, hiring an orchestra, and oh a little 15-carat diamond ring! All in all, an awesome ... waste of money.

Yeezy, you coulda pulled this off on the cheap, bro.

Ja Rule Prison Life Was Hot In the Kitchen, Anyway

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Ja Rule was a regular Julia Child during his prison sentence (with a much deeper voice) -- whipping up all kinds of cool dishes ... which is awesome.

But the key(ster) is trying not to think about how the ingredients got smuggled behind bars.

Justin Bieber Strippers Belieb He Can Make it Rain

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Justin Bieber's good deeds often go overlooked -- so we're highlighting his latest charitable act -- giving a Houston stripper stacks o' cash for her college fund.

He's a giver!

Kate Middleton Sexy Stomach Conspiracy

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Just 3 months after giving birth -- Kate Middleton's flat, ripped, royal mid-riff accidentally popped out in front of a bunch of London photogs.

That's what the Duchess wants you to believe, anyway ... but one conspiracy theorist ain't biting!

What Does the Fox Say? Time for Sexy Tricks and Treats

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Ylvis' song "What Does the Fox Say?" may be a constant assault on your ears -- but one good thing will come of it ... all the sexy fox costumes you're gonna see on Halloween!

Turn it up, Ylvis!

Kim K.'s Ass Caught in a Giant Coverup

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Kim Kardashian's ass serves many purposes -- the latest being her butt-flashing Instagram post ... which may have been strategically deployed to distract us from her family's slew of huge problems.

It's sneaky, but we're not complaining!.

Rush Limbaugh Takes Weak-Ass Shot at Howard Stern

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Howard Stern's been ripping Rush Limbaugh for years -- so when we opened the door for Rush to retaliate ... the man known for his big mouth took his shot.

Unfortunately for Rush, his comeback was kinda weak sauce.

Justin Bieber Ancient Chinese Secret Weapon

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Justin Bieber danced all over the Great Wall of China just for a music video -- so, naturally, the People's Republic of China thinks this is absolutely ... awesome!

Yeah, we were shocked too. Must be because he kept his shirt on, for once.

Adrian Peterson Hall of Fame Baby Maker Scored at Strip Club Too

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All Adrian Peterson does is score touchdowns for the Minnesota Vikings -- and make babies. Lots and lots of babies with at least 4 different women.

Based on the latest stats, even if Adrian doesn't get enshrined in the Hall of Fame ... his sperm definitely should.

Ron White's Wedding How to Get Hitched... Redneck Style

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Comedian Ron White's wedding was a true blue collar affair ... meaning you better check your cholesterol level at the door -- 'cause it's definitely going up once you dig into the Frito pie!

And yes ... that's as delicious, and bad for you, as it sounds.

Evan Lysacek It's a Vera Wang Thang

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Olympic figure skater Evan Lysacek has been chilling with fashion designer Vera Wang -- and some people even think they're dating.

Gotta say ... dude does love wearing Wang.