Heidi Montag's Bikini Comeback I'm Still Relevant, Dammit!
Former reality trainwreck Heidi Montag took a break from living in obscurity to wash up on the beach with all her augmented fake body parts in a skimpy red bikini in Santa Monica on Wednesday.
The 26-year-old former "The Hills" star -- who infamously had 10 plastic surgery procedures in one single day back in 2009 -- did some of her best acting while hamming it up for the cameras on the sand.
Who needs a lifeguard when you have built-in triple D floatation devices at all times?
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Random Hot Chicks It Takes Three to ...
Who: 3 random, but very hot chicks.
Where: Hollywood
When: Halloween
What: Engage them in intelligent conversa--just kidding ... we're gonna show sexy montages!
Why: The hell not?
Boom. Journalism, dude.
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Model Nicole Trunfio -- November is Bikini Season
This is Nicole Trunfio ... and she's the only famous person we could find today who's in a bikini.
In case you don't know who she is ... Nicole is an Australian-born fashion model who's worked for Victoria's Secret, Chanel, Vogue ... you get the idea.
We really didn't know who she was either ... so we went to her website ... and were greeted with a video that contains partial nudity.
So, if you don't like partial nudity, you should definitely NOT go to her website ... NicoleTrunfio.net.
Nicole is currently in Miami -- along with her boyfriend Gary Clark Jr. ... who happens to be a famous blues musician ... although we can no longer find anything for him to be sad about.
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Khloe K's Nipples Debut on 'X Factor'
Khloe Kardashian's boobs stole the show on "X Factor" last night ... this according to Simon Cowell who said he was so distracted by KK's tatas ... he could barely focus.
During Khloe's debut episode as a co-host -- along with Mario Lopez -- it became very apparent that KK wasn't wearing a bra underneath her extremely sheer top.
At one point, Simon pointed out that Khloe was pointing out ... saying, "May I say Khloe, you're looking very sexy tonight ... I think the air conditioning is on high."
Khloe shot back, "You love it" ... Simon, "It's very distracting."
Funny, it's usually Simon's nipples that can't be contained.
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Coco's Breasts Defeat Hurricane Sandy
If there was one bright spot in the chaos of Hurricane Sandy ... it was the strength and resolve of Coco Austin ... who braved rain and winds to make sure the masses would still get the opportunity to ogle her breasts.
Coco played the role of weather girl last night ... giving a play-by-play of the storm from her balcony in New Jersey.
Like a true pro, Coco stayed focused ... and refused to let the wind blow her jacket over her boobs during her report.
Bravo, Coco ... bravo.
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Dolly Parton My Halloween Costume is Gonna Be TRASHY!!!
Dolly Parton is gonna be a NAUGHTY girl this Halloween ... and she's not afraid to admit it.
Parton was having dinner at Matteo's in L.A. last night ... when she told us she had picked up a sexy costume at the famous Trashy Lingerie shop earlier this week ... and it sounds like it's gonna be AWESOME.
"We have fun at Halloween," Parton told us ... and as she grabbed her legendary boobs, she added, "I have two pumpkins ... that's all I care about."
God we love you.
Rumer Willis Hot, Wet Bikini Babe
Bruce Willis and Demi Moore's eldest daughter, Rumer Willis, showed off her A-list genetics by flashing her smokin' hot bod in a black bikini in Cancun this weekend.
Another member of Hollywood royalty has gone two pieces.
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Khloe Kardashian I Can Be a Babe Too!
In just a matter of hours, Khloe Kardashian went from a makeup-free natural woman to a polished and shellacked glowing orange babe in Miami.
Early on Wednesday, the sleepy and blemished 28-year-old soon-to-be "X Factor" host was spotted au naturel heading to the gym ... but just a little while later Kim's little sis was almost unrecognizable.
Her transformation -- refurbished weave, spray tanned skin, and the girls pushed up and into a form fitting strapless dress -- was nothing short of awesome.
Kardashian rule #1: Always be camera ready.
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Christina to Hillary My BOOBS Made You Look!
Christina Aguilera's massive boobs and Hillary Clinton's steely gaze proved once and for all that NO ONE -- male or female -- can ignore boobs on a platter! Well played, Madam Secretary.
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Hillary Clinton Busted
Hillary Clinton is clearly impressed with Christina Aguilera.
The two got together at the 2012 George McGovern Leadership Award Ceremony in Washington D.C. on Wednesday for their work in helping feed starving children throughout the world.
Clearly, Christina has what it takes to make sure no child ever goes hungry.
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Heidi Montag Headlining at Strip Club ... for $25,000
Coming up on the main stage ... Heeeeeeeidiiiiiiii Montag!!
TMZ has learned ... The former MTV reality star has struck a $25,000 deal to appear at the Crazy Horse III strip club in Vegas on October 19 ... but there's a pretty big catch.
Montag -- and her G-cup boobs -- will not be getting naked. So, patrons will only get a chance to throw money at giant unfamous boobs that night.
Montag was only hired to host the club's 3rd Year Anniversary Party.
Sources at the club tell us ... Spencer will accompany Heidi to the gentlemen's establishment.
Fun Fact -- the club will be serving sushi that night.
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Ali Landry Deserves a Paddling
Mario Lopez's 2-week wife Ali Landry is an expert on her knees, easily keeping her balance during a smoking hot paddle boarding session in Hawaii earlier today.
In case you forgot, Mario and Ali were married on April 24th, 2004. Their marriage was annulled two weeks later.
Clearly, the 39-year-old model has since gone two pieces.
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Ke$ha I'm a Sexy Leather Warrior Princess
She's no stranger to weird get-ups, but "Tik Tok" singer Ke$ha took it up a sexy notch by wearing some sorta revealing leather one-legged bathing suit type thing on the set of her "Die Young" music video in L.A. on Wednesday.
While she may have gotten hotter, no word on her singing.
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Christina Hendricks Brought Her Cleavage to the Emmys
It's awards season ... so naturally, Christina Hendricks' boobs dolled themselves up for a big night out at the Emmys!!
The boobs sat at a table with their "Mad Men" co-stars ... while sipping on champagne and snacking on some fancy desserts. They didn't win an award, but still a great time was had by all.
Sources say Christina was there too.
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Heidi Klum I'm Ok with Going Topless ON MY TERMS
Heidi Klum is totally cool being topless (like most Europeans) but she is adamant that snapping half-naked shots of her in the privacy of her own home is a HUGE NO NO ... sources close to the model tell TMZ.
As TMZ first reported, Heidi is considering filing a lawsuit after topless photos of her were printed in France. Klum is peeved because the photos were taken at her home, on a private beach.
We're told it's that fact that has Klum particularly peeved. Our sources says Klum has no problem being photographed topless when she goes on a public beach, but it's not okay when she's on private property.
According to our sources, Heidi says the cameramen were literally hanging from trees, using long range lenses (from miles away) and sending helicopters to fly over the house in order to get the shot.
We're told Heidi is furious that these private images -- which included her small children -- were blasted all over the world for everyone to see and even ended up on porn websites.
Our sources say Heidi is waiting to see how Kate Middleton's legal battle over her topless photos turns out before deciding whether or not to sue.
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Heidi Klum I May SUE Over New Topless Pics
Heidi Klum is really upset over brand new topless photos that have been published in a French magazine ... claiming her privacy was violated a la Kate Middleton ... and now she's seriously considering filing a lawsuit.
The photos have surfaced on several websites ... showing Heidi on vacation in the south of France with her bodyguard boyfriend ... sans bikini top.
There's just one problem ... it's unclear which French magazine published the original pics.
Sources close to Heidi tell TMZ ... the supermodel's camp is on the hunt for the source publication ... claiming her right to privacy was violated because she was on a private and secluded beach at the time the pics were taken.
Sound familiar? We're told Heidi is comparing her situation to that of Kate Middleton ... who also believes she was the victim of privacy invasion when a paparazzo snapped topless pics of her while she was sunbathing at a private chateau in France.
We're told ... just like Kate, Heidi wants to sue someone's ass ... but realizes she might have better luck if she waits for Kate to blaze the legal trail.
Long story short -- if Kate's legal attack is successful, Klum can simply copy her playbook ... and if it's not, she can learn from Kate's mistakes.
Supermodels -- they're not as dumb as you think.