TMZ TV

Justin Bieber should not get back with Selena Gomez because it's time the 18-year-old started banging random supermodels (said the devil) -- but the ladies of TMZ don't think he can close the deal.

Teen bride Courtney Stodden decided to show off something besides her boobs -- namely her mother ... who is actually PROUD of Courtney's, umm ... accomplishments?

Matthew McConaughey is looking slim, trim and damn near death -- but even though it's only for a movie role ... we're thinking this could catch on as a new diet craze.

Ronda Rousey is stepping into The Octagon as UFC's first female fighter -- thereby paving the way for chick-on-chick violence around the globe. Kinda like Susan B. Anthony ... in 4 oz. gloves!

"One Direction" singer Harry Styles just got the most awesome pair of tattoos -- if the year was 1996! Then again ... someone in our newsroom has the same knack for timely ink.

Four-time NBA champ John Salley knows a lot about trades -- so now that Puerto Rico might join the union ... is a state trade in order? Not that anyone asked, but we've got some options.

One Direction and Michael Jackson now have something in common -- a bodyguard ... in fact, the same one who was with MJ the day he died. Hope he has other references.

Snoop Dogg and the Mile High City are destined to be together now that Colorado's voted to legalize weed. Is that a Rocky Mountain exodus we smell? Nope ... it's ganja.

'Real Housewives' star Joanna Krupa is two things -- ridiculously hot in a bikini, and definitely NOT a hooker .. because she said she's not. Case closed. Now, camera whoring ...

"Breaking Bad" star Jonathan Banks tackled a classic and hysterical movie topic -- but one TMZ staffer wanted a more in-depth topic. What exactly ... he can't seem to spit out.

If you ever wanted to be in Tiger Woods' house, or one of his mistresses ... pay attention, 'cause Joslyn James is punching in at a whore house -- while Tiger overhauls his non-whore house.

Michael Jackson's former house is now a playground for semi-nude dudes in assless undies -- which ain't so weird ... relative to what used to go on there.

Author Nicholas Sparks is famous for banging out tearjerkers, like "The Notebook" and "Dear John" -- and his formula for success is simple: kill everyone! Romantically, of course.

Who: 3 random, but very hot chicks.
Where: Hollywood
When: Halloween
What: Engage them in intelligent conversa--just kidding ... we're gonna show sexy montages!
Why: The hell not?

Boom. Journalism, dude.

Chris Brown's decision to dress up as a member of the Taliban only comes in at #2 on his hit long list of really bad decisions -- and that's the best thing we can say about it.

George Lucas has passed the "Star Wars" baton to Disney, and nerds can rejoice -- at least until the Mouse does something dumb ... like NOT killing off Jar Jar Binks! C'mon, who do we gotta know?!