Grumpy Cat Not the Sharpest Claw on the Paw

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Grumpy Cat is missing more than a smile -- and we're guessing this might have more than a little to do with that look on her face.

Yes, we're saying GC couldn't find her way out of a paper bag.

Tom Cruise's Mom Spills Christmas Secrets

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TMZ TV
TMZ.com

Tom Cruise's mom Mary Lee Pfeiffer knows some deep, dark secrets, and we got her to tell all -- about Tommy boy, his childhood ... and Christmas!

Not to be over dramatic, but -- This one changes everything! (Ok, slightly over dramatic)

Julia Roberts The Maybe Baby Bump That Wasn't (aka Fun While It Lasted)

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Julia Roberts was looking mighty pregnant based on some new photos, and the expert medical opinions -- of thousands of people ... in and out of our newsroom.

Apparently, we all need to brush up on our OB/GYN skills.

Robin Thicke Coolest Display of Coolness Ever, UNTIL ...

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Robin Thicke rolled through LAX like the coolest dude in the world -- cool outfit, cool shades, cool everything ... and then all that super coolness imploded in one hysterically uncool moment.

Even cool guys forget stuff.

Gabrielle Union D. Wade Has the Best, Biggest Tickets Around

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Gabrielle Union was asked what she considers the best part of dating an NBA superstar like Dwyane Wade -- and for some reason she didn't reply ... "monster dong."

No matter how much we willed her to say it.

Wendy's Marijuana Burger Gimme a Side of Fries with That Blunt

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A Wendy's employee gets high, drops a blunt into a cheeseburger, and serves it to a customer. No biggie ... in Colorado, maybe -- but in Georgia the customer called 911.

You might say she was smoking mad ... if you were into really bad puns.

Note to Beyonce's Dad If Your GF Gets Knocked Up ... Ya Gotta Pay Up

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Beyonce's dad Mathew Knowles' is either a deadbeat dad or a poor sap who's dealing with a greedy baby mana ... but either way ... that's what he gets for cheating on his wife and not using a condom.

Darth Vader Teenage Girl Tendencies

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Disney kicked off its new "Star Wars" marketing campaign by releasing a Darth Vader an Instagram selfie -- which is kinda cool -- but freakin' Jar Jar Binks better not get a Tumblr.

That's the line, Mickey. Don't cross it!

Jada Pinkett Smith That Ma-Ma-Ma Mom Thong

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Jada Pinkett Smith flaunted her awesome 42-year-old ass on a Hawaiian beach ... in an equally awesome thong -- and all the world rejoiced.

Well, all except the prudes who think mom bods are strictly one-piece territory.

LeBron James Catching Heat Over Macklemore Bromance

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LeBron James' love affair with Macklemore is simply adorable to just about everyone -- from Miami Heat fans to hip hop fans. And even though haters gonna hate ...

LeBron can't change. Even if he tried ...even if he wanted to.

Joan Rivers Sparks a Racial Slur Revolution

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Joan Rivers dropped every racial epithet she could think of in 10 seconds ... all in defense of Alec Baldwin's recent homophobic rant.

Not the most traditional defense of an alleged bigot, but effective. Maybe?

Kim Kardashian Big Fan of Rogen's 'Bound 2' Spoof ... We Think

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Kim Kardashian said she thought Seth Rogen and James Franco's "Bound 2" spoof was funny -- but we still can't tell if she actually liked it.

You try interpreting a chick who rarely says more than 5 words at a time!

Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Huge with Porn Stars & Directors

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Toronto Mayor Rob Ford could be the biggest thing in porn -- if he simply accepts an offer to make a XXX tape, which may not be so far fetched.

Let's face it ... he's said yes to just about everything else.

Sydney Leathers Excess Lady Parts for Sale!

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Anthony Weiner's sexting partner Sydney Leathers has something special for you -- the extra vagina skin she's having surgically removed ... and it could be yours!

You just have to make the highest bid ... AND surrender every shred of your dignity.

Brian from 'Family Guy' All Cartoon Dogs Don't Go To Heaven

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"Family Guy" writers did the unthinkable -- heartlessly killing off their lovable dog Brian, which would be sooo sad ... if Brian was a real dog and not just a cartoon drawing.

Still pretty freakin' sad though.

'Color Me Badd' Singer Still Badd But Way Bigger

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"Color Me Badd" singer Bryan Abrams is barely recognizable these days, thanks to several dozen added lbs -- but before ya feel too sorry for BA ... he's also a repeat domestic violence offender.

Yeah, no one's sexing him up anymore.