The Hills

Spencer Pratt caused seizures on Robertson this weekend -- blasting Heidi Montag's "music" from his car as he waited to pick up his fame-hungry girlfriend from Kitson. We asked Spencer if he actually enjoyed the song ... but if he said anything, it couldn't be heard over the shrieking.

We also spotted them having a casual (by which we mean awkwardly businesslike) rendezvous with "Access Hollywood's" Maria Menounos later in the evening. Because they're all such close pals.

And after making that brilliant insight outside the Kobe Club, she also said she's starring with Denzel Washington in a movie. We're guessing, it's the same way Natalie Cole starred in a movie with her dad -- aka, green screen.

The Johnny Depp wannabe (sans charisma, manners and a brain) has landed a gig posing for Orthodox, a sporty men's wear label. Think it's ambitious for Mr. Bobby to land a job on his own? Fear not, Orthodox is a division of People's Revolution - the place Whitney, and now LC, "work."

Isn't it great how everything just seems to work out on "The Hills"?

How else can you describe a pap welcoming committee of Britney proportions for two people who do absolutely nothing?

Instead of 20-something hotties throwing themselves at him in Malibu yesterday, Jenner was accosted by a gaggle of 13-year-olds. No word on which of them he'll go with to the Sadie Hawkins dance.

Thanks to a few well-placed peeps desperately seeking their 15 minutes and a boring conversation with LC, Brody and Frankie turns into something actually worth watching!

Joe Scarborough asked McCain what he thought of the fact that Heidi Montag, lame-ass "Hills" star, endorsed him. McCain ever-so-not cleverly evaded the question, saying Heidi was a "very talented actress." Joe had just launched into one of the hard-hitting attacks he's famous for, accusing him of not being a fan of "The Hills."

Clearly embarrassed -- though it completely escaped Joe -- McCain then volunteered he had also received endorsements from Clint Eastwood, Sly Stallone and Jon Voight. Clearly those are meaningful endorsements, because everyone wants Rambotox's choice as the next leader of the free world.

McCain didn't have much to say -- but his bodyguards did, rushing the photog off-camera and threateningly asking why he'd ever ask a question like that . It's like someone asked him about bathrooms and airports! Why is Heidi such a scandal? Is it too hot for McCain to address? We're just sayin'.....

McCain told Time that he is "honored to have Heidi [Montag]'s support," and that he never misses an episode of "The Hills," especially "since the new season started."

Ok, now that is the guy we don't want answering the phone at 3:00 AM.

Resident "Hills" dolt Heidi Montag tells Us she is entering the political arena, even though she doesn't really know what an arena is ... and she's endorsing John McCain.

Somewhere, Obama and Hil are grinning.

"The Hills" vixen is learning to strip the layers of Hollywood one article of clothing at a time. This move guarantees at least five more minutes in the spotlight. But just five ...

Following in the mansize 11 footsteps of Paris Hilton, and other more demure chicks like Pamela Anderson and Carmen Electra, Audrina from "The Hills" took the stage for the Pussycat Dolls lounge at PURE in Las Vegas. She was dressed in her very best hoochie chic.

Though a completely valid question about her newfound popularity, the "Hills" star was not having it.

Now that everyone knows what kind of girl she really is, Audrina is getting top billing -- and around $5k -- to take her clothes off with the Pussycat Dolls in Vegas on Friday. We're told her peeps have been working overtime to pimp her out hardcore to cash in on her new found notoriety. Just a few months ago, 'Drina couldn't get into Hyde -- now she's getting paid to host a night at PURE and drink for free in a VIP booth. Dontcha wish your naked pics were hot like hers!

Looks like Audrina is taking a page straight from the Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian Hollywood Handbook -- and her sex tape hasn't even surfaced yet!

Her rep tells us she's not performing, just introducing the Dolls on stage. The rep adds, for the record, this gig was locked in way before the nudie pics surfaced.