Nurse!

TMZ spies tell us ever since the unwed teen mother gave birth last week, she's been staying at mom Lynne's Kentwood home -- which Britney paid for -- called Serenity. We're told even though JL and baby daddy Casey Aldridge bought a home in nearby Liberty, Miss., Jamie has decided to stay with Mama Spears because she's realized it ain't so easy raising a child ... especially, when you're still one yourself.

As far as Casey's living arrangements, we're told he goes back and forth between staying with Jamie Lynn and little Maddie Briann, and his folks' home. An adult mother's work is never done.

With all the money they got for the baby pics, couldn't Jen buy him a cheeseburger?!

Daniel Serrano -- aka Dr. Jiffy Lube -- will work for food! Last week, Dr. Lube assured a judge he had a job lined up should he be released from jail. TMZ did a little diggin' and ... you guessed it -- Serrano should be in the unemployment line.

Serrano told the judge cosmetic surgeon Dr. Nathan Newman had offered him a gig at his Beverly Hills office. Dr. Newman tells TMZ that's not true -- he's not hiring anyone.

In addition, Dr. Nathan says the supposed "job offer letter" from 2005 Serrano produced in court last week was simply a letter of recommendation for a medical internship.

Without a job, Serrano's chances of staying in the U.S. are slimming down. Argentina, don't cry for him.

Decked out in precious matching pink outfits on their yacht in Capri, Rod nursed on his 37-year-old wife Penny Lancaster's supple breast.

TMZ has learned that the skanktastic Sand was just one of 300 people that the Feds have contacted because they were "involved" with Dr. Daniel Serrano -- aka Dr. Jiffy Lube. Shauna tells us that Dr. Lube always "wanted" to work on her, but that she actually refused because she had a "bad feeling about him."

Heather Locklear's checked herself into a psychological treatment facility in Arizona.

The actress' rep tells PEOPLE "Heather has been dealing with anxiety and depression. She requested an in-depth evaluation of her medication and entered into a medical facility for proper diagnosis and treatment."

As TMZ first reported, Heather's doctor called 911 back in March, concerned that she was suicidal.

After collapsing at her home, spending a week in the hospital and being diagnosed with "early signs of what could be emphysema," Wineheezy did what any popwreck with a death wish would do -- smoked a cig!

How do you say conservatorship in British?

Larry King's wife, Shawn Southwick King, has checked into rehab for an addiction to painkillers.

A friend of the couple told the NY Post Mrs. King was seeking treatment saying, "Shawn is in rehab for medication issues related to her chronic migraine problem."

With her Pharaoh headgear, body glitter and clown makeup, the fierce, unmonitored 60-year-old piece of work drank champers after a performance in London on Thursday. No word on exactly what that "performance" entailed.

Dubya got a parting gift from a group of schoolchildren in Northern Ireland on Monday -- a flowery plant with the words The Mighty Bush written across it.

Is there anyone who doesn't want to give Bush something?!

There's cancer, heart disease, AIDS, and ... did we mention cancer? But the American Medical Association has its scalpels out for that evil medical scourge -- Ricki Lake.

The AMA has issued a resolution slamming Ricki and her pet cause, midwife-aided home-birth baby delivery, as chronicled in her film The Business of Being Born. What's more, they're using Ricki as a tool to get laws passed that would mandate that the "safest setting" for birth is in the hospital ... where OB/GYNs get paid, of course.

Tori Spelling as a suspect mom, we get. But Ricki?

After years of working runways, nerves and lace front weaves, the 38-year-old anger management diva appears to be going bald. Never mind a cell phone, somebody throw some Rogaine at her!

Looks like the devil has a cause after all! Kid Rock has been hospitalized for stomach cramps and dehydration. The rocker was set to perform onstage at the U.K.'s Download Festival Friday, but had to cancel last minute due to his health conditions.

A statement from the organizers of the festival says, "We've had the curse of Download. Kid Rock is not very well -- we've had to rush him to hospital ... he apologizes to his fans." Rock had reportedly been out at the Central London's Whisky Mist nightclub the night before the concert.

Here's a 37-year-old Bernie in 1985 (left) -- and the ageless, 60-year-old widow (SIXTY!) at her NYC book signing on Thursday (right).

Dorothy, Rose, Blanche and Sophia ain't got nuthin' on this golden girl!