TMZ TV

We've got details about that Usher sex tape being shopped around town -- but remember ... this could have been much, much worse. Anyone wanna see the Alf sex tape?

Michael Vartan from "Alias" made a SHOCKING revelation -- he thinks the comedy masterpiece "Spaceballs" is stupid. May the Schwartz be with him ...

Elton John went OFF on a female photographer (not ours, luckily) -- calling her the biggest no-no word of them all ... and we're pretty confident she didn't deserve it.

Tiger Woods' #1 mistress Rachel Uchitel will shoot your freaking face off -- because the future private investigator is mastering the tricks of the trade ... and turns out she's got a deadeye.

Ice-T's voluptuous wife Coco has a Twitter page that's uhh ... well ... it's hard to put into words. Luckily, Coco's got lots and lots of pictures to tell the story. Roll 'em!!

The Donald Trump roast was BRUTAL with tasteless jokes cracked about Rihanna, the Obamas, Lisa Lampanelli and many more. But most offensive of all -- The Situation's attempt at comedy.

Hollywood beware ... a handful of famous couples who've eaten at Eva Longoria's restaurant Beso have SUDDENLY BROKEN UP!!! Could it be cursed? Probably ... not.

Mel Gibson isn't going to jail for hitting Oksana Grigorieva. And in other news ... something's left a really BAD taste in Harvey's mouth.

Tom Brady's rockin' a pony in Rio, but dude is still a dud when it comes to Carnival. Lucky for him -- and us -- his booty-shaking wife Gisele Bundchen is picking up the slack ... BIG TIME!

Gary Busey could teach Charlie Sheen a thing or two about being crazy ... like how to do it while stone-cold sober and dancing on a stripper pole. Shake it Busey, shake it!!

Mr. T.'s pint-sized impersonator, Mini T., says he is NOT available for your St. Patrick's Day party because he's no leprechaun! Besides that ... what's up with renting little people, anyway?

Mark Zuckerberg's seemingly innocent adoption of a Puli puppy named Beast has taken the world right to the brink of a nuclear-sized explosion ... of cuteness. Brace yourself.

If Ryan Seacrest and Randy Jackson were stranded on a desert island ... would sparks fly? And by that we mean sparks from the fire they would be making, not the other thing you're thinking about.

Three isn't usually a crowd in the porn world -- but two of Charlie Sheen's former XXX flings CAN'T STAND the other one. That's right people ... it's a porn war!

Eric Clapton washed and dried his own clothes in a coin-op LAUNDROMAT ... proving Slowhand is one super-chill blues man -- who's also handy with whites, darks, delicates ...

Rihanna didn't just browse through a sex shop down under (we mean Australia) -- she left with TWO BAGS full of sexy stuff! Dying to know what was in her bags? Yeah ... us too.