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Elmo F Is for Fired ... By Donald Grump?!

3/20/2017 9:11 AM PDT

0320-elmo-trump-tmz-gettyElmo is weighing in on President Trump's plan to cut his salary ... and Elmo ain't tickled. Not at all.

The normally happy "Sesame Street" resident was pretty surly in this spoof reacting to Trump's proposed congressional budget, in which the prez wants to completely eliminate federal funding for PBS.

Unclear if PBS or "Sesame Street" brass signed off on this -- but it's pretty damn funny.

Elmo down on his luck.

Houston PD Blames NFL Security For Stolen Tom Brady Jersey

3/20/2017 9:38 AM PDT
Breaking News

The Houston PD wants to make it perfectly clear it was NFL security that had watch over the Patriots locker room ... and therefore it's NFL security who should get the blame for Tom Brady's jersey going missing.

Click here... it's not over yet

Donald Trump Jr. 5-Year-Old Son Tristan Breaks Leg on Ski Slopes

3/20/2017 6:52 AM PDT
EXCLUSIVE

0320-tristan-trump-baret-instagram-01Donald Trump Jr.'s son, Tristan, was taken to a hospital Sunday after breaking his leg in Aspen ... TMZ has learned.

We're told Secret Service accompanied the 5-year-old to the ER after he fractured his leg on the ski slopes.

Tristan was skiing with his family and Ivanka's family in Aspen over the weekend.

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Justin Bieber Does This Thing Go Any Faster?

3/20/2017 10:03 AM PDT

0320-justin-bieber-boat-ride-MEGA-02Justin Bieber was so totally unimpressed by something called "the world's most exciting jet boat ride" -- and it was written all over his face.

The Biebs had Monday off from his tour and hopped on a Shotover Jet in Queenstown, New Zealand. The high-speed boat hits 50 mph while careening and doing 360 turns. If that sounds like it'd be tons of fun ... it probably is, unless you're Justin.

Occupational hazard for a guy who drives exotic sports cars, we guess. 

JB rented out the entire boat for himself and his 2 pals, so at least he was bored in private.

James Comey FBI Investigating Russia, Trump Campaign ... And NO Wiretapping Evidence

3/20/2017 8:05 AM PDT
Breaking News

FBI Director James Comey says extreme situations call for extreme measures ... which is why he's actually revealing there IS an open investigation into Russia and the presidential election.

Comey testified on Capitol Hill Monday morning the Bureau is looking into whether the Russians really did interfere, and also whether anyone in Donald Trump's camp was communicating with Russia.

He said it's a break from policy to go public this way, but added there will still be some limits about what's revealed.

As for Donald Trump's claims President Obama was wiretapping him ... Comey said the Bureau has "no information" to support that.

Chuck Berry Died of 'Natural Causes' No Autopsy

3/20/2017 7:46 AM PDT
EXCLUSIVE

0321-chuck-berry-getty-2Chuck Berry died from natural causes ... TMZ has learned.

We're told Berry's personal doctor will sign off on the death certificate that the cause of death was natural, and there will be no autopsy. By the way, various diseases would still classify the cause of death as "natural."

Police responded to a medical emergency Saturday at Berry's home 45 miles from St. Louis. Attempts to resuscitate the 90-year-old legend were unsuccessful.

Chuck was a pioneer for rock 'n' roll in both style and sound. He had a string of hits through his long, decorated career including "Johnny B. Goode," "Roll Over Beethoven," "Maybellene" and tons more.

RIP

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Tom Brady's Stolen Jersey RECOVERED On 'Foreign Soil' ... Viva Mexico!

3/20/2017 5:50 AM PDT
Breaking News

0321-tom-brady-getyThe FBI has recovered Tom Brady's stolen Super Bowl 51 jersey and the Houston PD says it was tracked to MEXICO!!!

Click here... it's not over yet

Kim Kardashian They Were Going to Rape, Kill Me ... I Mentally Prepared for It

3/20/2017 7:26 AM PDT

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Kim Kardashian was getting ready, in her mind, to be raped and killed by the men who robbed her in Paris ... and hearing Kim tell it is harrowing.

Kim fully opened up about the robbery on Sunday's 'KUWTK', saying she went so far as to imagine Kourtney would be the one who found her dead body.

She paints a very vivid picture of the ordeal, and combined with the crime scene photos ... you can imagine the horror she felt in that moment.

Catch Restaurant Gun Suspect Tased By Cops

3/20/2017 7:19 AM PDT

A man faced off with at least 4 cops outside of Catch Saturday night ... and lost hard when they fired their tasers.

Law enforcement sources tell us cops were called to the famous WeHo restaurant to deal with a man with a possible gun. Things escalated quickly when the suspect didn't follow orders ... so they fired.

It's pretty gnarly -- you can hear the guy screaming out "What did I do?!" before he's taken down. Even crazier ... he's got a dog right next to him that's in the mix of the scuffle.

Cops did not find a gun. The man was booked for resisting arrest.

D.L. Hughley F*** Respecting Office of President ... He Doesn't Respect Us!

3/20/2017 7:05 AM PDT
EXCLUSIVE

D.L. Hughley says Steve Harvey is dead wrong about Snoop Dogg, and other entertainers, showing Donald Trump R-E-S-P-E-C-T ... because the prez doesn't know how to spell it.

D.L. told us at LAX ... that old adage about how the public should treat a sitting president just doesn't apply anymore. His pal, Steve, warned Snoop his "Lavender" music video is crossing a dangerous line.

But in D.L.'s eyes ... Trump's only getting what he's giving.

Robert Blake & Fiancee It Appears They're Already Hitched!!!

3/20/2017 7:01 AM PDT
EXCLUSIVE

Robert Blake and Pamela Hudak not only took out a marriage license earlier this month ... they appear to be married.

We got the two hand in hand up in Beverly Glen Sunday and our photog congratulated them on their "marriage." Robert acknowledged with a nod.

A nod, however, is all we got.

Robert was acquitted in 2005 the murder of his second wife, Bonnie Lee Bakley.

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Trump Tower Secret Service Theft Caught on Video Thief Knew What He Was After

3/20/2017 1:00 AM PDT
EXCLUSIVE

0317-secret-service-agent-laptop-tmz-gettyThe thief who swiped a Secret Service agent’s laptop targeted the agent in question and knew exactly what he was after ... law enforcement sources tell TMZ.

Our sources say the thief -- whom they say is a man -- was caught on surveillance video pulling up to the agent's driveway in an Uber at around 3 AM Thursday.

The video shows the man make a beeline for the agent's car, removing a backpack with the computer inside and then walking off. As we reported, the hard drive contained Trump Tower floor plans and evacuation protocols, but the agency insists there was no classified info inside.

The thief also made off with a passport and several Secret Service lapel pins.

It's unclear what the thief was looking for if all the content was non-sensitive.  

We're told the video is grainy so it's hard to make out the thief's features, but it's definitely a lead.

Tupac 'Dear Mama' Lyrics Up for Sale

3/20/2017 12:50 AM PDT
EXCLUSIVE

0317-tupac-dear-mama-lyrics-launch-01Tupac used 3 sheets of notebook paper to write out the lyrics of "Dear Mama" ... that's $25k per sheet for whoever wants to be the proud new owner.

The handwritten lyrics of the 1995 hit song are up for sale at MomentsInTime.com for $75,000. We're told the sheets came from the studio where Tupac recorded the track -- the site acquired them from a private collector in Poland.

The lyrics are what you'd expect if you know the song, except for a couple notes 'Pac jotted down on the side -- the names of rappers he may have been thinking about featuring ... and a much more graphic note on the last page.


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