Miss Bangkok -- Lust in Translation
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Miss Bangkok will love you long time ... she just doesn't know what that means.
A woman claiming to represent the Thailand province wasn't speaking English this weekend outside La Vida -- but thanks to her naughty publicist, she can now quote the hooker from "Full Metal Jacket" and say "Spongebob Squarepenis."
That's an education you won't get at ESL class.
Bar Refaeli -- #1 at the Beach
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Leonard DiCaprio might be tops at the box office, but no one draws in the crowds like Bar Refaeli in a bikini.
Always worth the price of admission.
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Heidi Montag My Hills Aren't Big Enough
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Heidi Montag 3.0 is still getting used to her new parts -- but she's already itching for an upgrade.
We got Heidi, her bosom buddies and Spencer Thursday night outside Dan Tana's, where it became clear she won't be done enhancing her chest until she can no longer stand upright.
Guess the Badonkadonk!
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Can you guess whose juicy lady lumps were spotted roaming around the San Fernando Valley on Thursday?
Terrell Owens The Gutsiest Fashion Move Ever
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With his Tina Turner wig securely fashioned to his melon and a Run DMC gold rope around his neck, NFL wide receiver Terrell Owens hit the runway at a New York fashion show last night with a whole new image.
After that dreadful season with the Buffalo Bills, it's no wonder T.O. doesn't want anyone to recognize him.
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Heidi Montag in 3DDD
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Heidi Montag -- and all of her brand new refurbished parts -- managed not to melt while standing upright underneath the hot L.A. sun on Wednesday.
In case of an emergency, the 23-year-old may be used as a flotation device.
The hills are alive!
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Gerard Butler: Pussycat Doll Got Your Tongue?
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While celebrating Carnival in Rio on Tuesday, Gerard Butler was spotted hanging with Jennifer Aniston Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls.
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like her?
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Mariska Hargitay Goes Two-Pieces
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"Law & Order: SVU" star Mariska Hargitay showed off her special swimsuit units while in St. Barth's this weekend.
Being Jayne Mansfield's daughter comes with a lot of perks.
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The Same Old Situation
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Once again "Jersey Shore's" The Situation did the only thing he seems to know how to do, besides workout, tan and pick up skanks: Show off his overexposed hairless abs.
The 27-year-old did his tired routine at a Suger Factory event in Vegas this weekend.
Time to cancel this Situation comedy?
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Levi Johnston -- Wet & Naked for $10 a Pop
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Levi Johnston's naked body is now considered a pay-per-view event.
This morning, DirectTV started charging $9.95 for "Levi Johnston Playgirl Shoot" -- a behind-the-scenes special showing the father of one in various states of Palin-unapproved undress.
It's unclear if Levi is gettin' any additional money from sales in the back end ... but he definitely shows his.
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Axl Rose -- Sweat Child O' Mine
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Looking like the bastard love child of Mickey Rourke and Kathy Griffin, the drenched remains of Axl Rose performed at a NYC John Varvatos store -- which was formerly the legendary CBGB's -- last night.
The 48-year-old lead singer of what's left of Guns N' Roses is hotter than ever ... literally.
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S.I. Swimsuit Models -- Check Out My Ash
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The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit team partied their butts off in Las Vegas last night -- as in, cigarette butts.
It all went down at Vanity in the Hard Rock Hotel where some of the hottest chicks in the world, including Bar Refaeli partied their faces off ... while sucking away on cancer stick after cancer stick ... after cancer stick.
Not all of the models needed to smoke to be smokin' hot -- cameras never spotted cover model Brooklyn Decker with a cig in her mouth once.
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Kelly Osbourne -- New & Improved
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Doing her best Paris Hilton impersonation, Kelly Osbourne showed off her new rockin' bod, tanned flesh and refurbished blonde bob at a fashion event in NYC last night.
The rehabbed 25-year-old celebuspawn has never looked better.
Apparently, there are perks to being on "Dancing with the Stars." Who knew?
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Megan Fox Thumb Double -- The Body to Match
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Megan Fox's Super Bowl thumb double isn't just a hand jobber -- the chick behind the digits also models different body parts ... and they're way better than her fingers.
The mystery chick is Pamela Moses who was called in to play the role of Megan Fox's fingers for a Motorola spot that ran during the big game.
We're told Moses, whose thumbs were first recognized by TheDirty.com, didn't know she was up for the job when she was asked to take a pic of her hands to send to her people.
But apparently Motorola liked Moses' hands better than Fox's -- possibly due to Megan's "uniquely" shaped thumbs -- and signed her on.
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Kevin Sorbo - Still a Greek God
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While snorkeling in Hawaii on Wednesday, former "Hercules" star Kevin Sorbo showed off his super strength in the form of his ripped furry pecs and abs.
The 51-year-old should have no problem getting lei'd.
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Miranda Kerr Legs for Days
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Here's supermodel Miranda Kerr in Australia on Thursday, without her lucky ass boyfriend Orlando Bloom.
Who wouldn't want to go down under with her?