Humor

Shia LeBeouf got hitched to Mia Goth in Vegas Monday, but just a couple days before ... he was lit up and in love with another woman in Germany.

Witnesses at the Frankfurt Airport bar tell TMZ ... Shia was super friendly with other patrons and even bought a round of shots for everyone. He especially took a shine to an older lady in the bar ... and had some fun when she walked over to say goodbye. Weird fun.

Check it out ... Shia turned on the charm big time, saying he wanted to follow her "into the future." Everyone got a laugh, including the woman ... who had her own witty comeback for him.

Kevin Hart hasn't quite had rotten tomatoes thrown at him while onstage ... but he has dealt with fried poultry and half-naked men all in one heckling.

We got Kevin in NYC -- where he was promoting "What Now?" -- and asked about his worst bombing experience as a stand-up -- he didn't disappoint. Kevin tells us he was performing at a male strip club once ... when he came face-to-face with a thrown buffalo wing.

Sounds like he tried to be a grown little man about it, but chickened out.

Ron White is a calm, cool and collected comedian when he's onstage, but if you vandalize his tour bus in the middle of the night ... he becomes a half naked maniac who'll chase you down with a golf club.

TMZ got this photo of White apparently coming after a guy who was doing the dirty deed. Underwear? Don't care ... and we're told he pulled a gap wedge out of his golf bag, Elin Nordegren style.

As we reported ... a man was arrested after he sideswiped Ron's bus with his truck. The guy was cited by cops, but he became enraged and started kicking the bus, denting it.

Ron wasn't having it, and summed it all up to us like this ... "Don't f*** with me when I've been drinking."

Rick Ross has bragged about having a lot of horses, but looks like he'd never ridden one ... until now.

Ross struggled to hoist himself onto a trusty steed over the weekend, with his crew capturing the whole adventure.

Check out the clip -- the Boss fails once, but gets back on the horse ... of course.

Justin Bieber is a man of many looks ... but his latest might be his most epic.

The Biebs was out in Amsterdam Friday sporting a wig, glasses and a classic porn 'stache with matching goatee. The only problem -- JB did a poor job covering up his signature tats -- but to be honest, they're a perfect fit with the look.

Further proof ... things get weird in Amsterdam.

Comedian Gary Owen says he's seen LeBron James' penis with his own eyes -- and praised it as a national treasure -- after he snuck a peek in the bathroom at Dwyane Wade's wedding.

Owen was on "The Real" (airs Oct 10th) when he talked about his most memorable LeBron encounter -- while they were peeing next to each other when Gabby and D-Wade tied the knot back in 2014.

"I’m getting ready to use the restroom and Lebron walked in. And he’s at the stall right next to me, so I took a little glance," Owen revealed.

This is so bad it's good.

Washington Capitols superstar Alex Ovechkin whiffed TWICE while trying to tee off Thursday ... shocking, considering the guy swings a hockey stick for a living.

But you gotta watch the entire clip ... Alex eventually focuses and connects with a pretty solid shot -- and celebrates like he just won the Stanley Cup!

It's better than Charles Barkley ... but it's close.

Who's got hockey jokes?? PRESIDENT OBAMA!!

The Pittsburgh Penguins hit the White House Thursday to be honored for winning the Stanley Cup -- and you know what that means??? POTUS ZINGERS!

Old jokes? Yep.

Chicago jokes? You know it.

Baby crying? That happened too.

How can a player be a distraction when the only person he's yelling at ... is himself?!?!?!

That's what Roddy White wants to know in the case of Odell Beckham and the NY Giants.

The NFL superstar explained why he thinks pointing the finger at Odell is a waste of time and energy ... and instead of criticizing the best player on the team, the G-Men need to draw up better battle plans!!

Rob Corddry says he would blindly trust tattoo artist Scott Campbell with his own skin ... blindly.

We got the "Hot Tub Time Machine" star at LAX where he showed us his newest tat from Scott himself. He fesses up ... he didn't stick his arm in Scott's famous tattoo glory hole ... not to say he wouldn't do it.

Scott's done tats for the likes of Howard Stern and Robert Downey Jr. after all ... not to mention his wife, Lake Bell.

Check out the clip -- Rob's confident in Scott's judgment ... no fear of broner tats here.

This is pretty hilarious ... Ben Affleck's raw reaction when he found out his beloved Patriots were getting spanked by Rex Ryan's Buffalo Bills.

"F***."

It all went down when Affleck was getting ready to do an interview with Sports Illustrated ... and he dared to ask the reporter about the score.

Affleck wasn't just upset that they were losing ... but the fact they were losing to REX RYAN!

And the Academy Award goes to ... someone other than Clay Matthews.

But hey, at least when it comes to reenacting scenes from classic movies ... the Packers star gets an A for effort.

The woman who claims Chris Brown pulled a gun on her got a hysterical assist from Breezy in her quest to win a beauty pageant.

Baylee Curran was a contestant in the Miss Greater Inland Empire Pageant -- it's a prelim for Miss California -- and when it came time for the evening gown competition last weekend, she got a sweet and serendipitous surprise.

The DJ had a great sense of humor because he threw on CB's "Don't Wake Me Up." Watch the video ... you gotta laugh.

The pageant director tells TMZ the song choice was purely a coincidence. People in the audience say it didn't appear Baylee noticed, but she was upset about something else.

We're told she didn't even place in the competition, so she stormed out early. Still a better exit than the one she made at Chris' house.

Joe Jonas and Wilmer Valderrama have Eskimo bro etiquette down to a tee -- date the same woman, give thy brother a lift.

We got Joe and Wilmer looking chummy on their way out of Zinque in WeHo. Watch what happened when our photog asked about their shared history with Demi Lovato ... the bros know the code.

We know they're kinda modified EBs -- since Joe was doing the "purity ring" thing when he was with Demi. Still, nice to see they can hang.

FUN FACT: Wilmer took shotgun and Joe drove. #1 always drives ... textbook EBs.

Rory McIlroy was upstaged by a heckler in the gallery at the Ryder Cup Thursday morning -- when the golfer missed a putt multiple times ... and an American heckler came out and showed him how it's done!

Rory was doing a practice round at Hazeltine National Golf Club in Minnesota when he got to the 6th hole and ran into some trouble on the green.

The heckler essentially told Rory he could do it better ... so Henrik Stenson challenged the guy to come out on the course and hit it himself.

Golfer Justin Rose even put up $100 to the heckler if he made the shot.

Well, guess what -- HE DRAINED THE 12 FOOT PUTT ... while wearing jeans and what appeared to be house slippers!!!

Rory wasn't bitter -- in fact, he gave the guy a hug and helped him celebrate.

More jokes from President Obama ... this time, POTUS was busting out the zingers with the Team USA Olympians ... crackin' on everything from his gymnastics skills to "Phelps face."

It all went down at the White House ... where Obama and gold medal gym superstar Simone Biles riffed for a little while before B.O. turned his attention to Michael Phelps and the famous pre-race face that became an Internet meme.

One important note ... Ryan Lochte was NOT at the ceremony -- because he WASN'T ALLOWED per the punishment he received over that whole drunken bathroom situation in Rio.