The Kardashians

Bust out the M80s -- Kris Jenner and Khloe Kardashian can celebrate dodging criminal charges for that massive fireworks display they set off in the middle of the night ... terrifying beach residents.

Law enforcement sources tell us the L.A. County Sheriff's Department wrapped its investigation into the explosive yacht party Khloe threw for James Harden's birthday early in the morning of August 26th.

We're told the Sheriff's Dept. presented its findings to the LA. County District Attorney, and recommended a misdemeanor charge of disturbing the peace -- but the D.A. rejected it because the Kardashians had "passive permission."

We broke the story ... the Coast Guard gave the Sheriff a heads up that Kris' production co. would be lighting up the sky that night, and didn't need a permit since the boat was outside the marina. Still, angry residents wanted the Sheriff to bust them for violating noise ordinances.

Had they prosecuted, it's unclear who would take the fall -- Kris, Khloe, or the fireworks vendor -- but it's a moot point now ... criminally, anyway.

We're told a group of residents is still pushing forward with a small claims lawsuit.

Don't mess with Kris Jenner in Paris.

The Kardashian matriarch is all over Fashion Week ... although it's hard to spot her in the considerable shadow of her mammoth new bodyguard, who is a dead ringer for a modern day Thor.

Sure, Kris is only 5'6" ... but her slab of beef-for-hire looks to be at least THREE heads taller than her. Warning: Approach the momager with extreme care.

King Kong (and the Eiffel Tower, for that matter) ain't got nothing on him.

Kylie Jenner is outdoing big sister Kim again ... this time with her Halloween costume.

Kylie stopped by Trashy Lingerie in LA this week -- the same place Caitlyn Jenner got her Vanity Fair corset -- to get the ball rolling on a sexy mermaid costume.

Sound familiar?

Kim dressed up as a mermaid back in 2012 for a NYC Halloween party. We're told Kylie's going to show way more skin. And Kylie's kostume will be festooned with beads and rhinestones.

Kim spent around $2,500 for her mermaid costume ... Kylie's going bigger and cheaper -- under $2k.

She also wants extra padding ... some things she just can't one up.

Kim Kardashian and Kylie Jenner are in a battle for queen, but we've learned based on the numbers, Kim is poised to win the war.

Kylie supporters came out in droves 10 days ago when the Kardashian/Jenner sisters' pay websites launched, with 74% of users downloading Kylie's app -- Kim was in third place with 9%. But we got hold of the numbers, and the tables are turning ... fast.

With more than a million users now using the pay sites, we're told Kylie has 40% of the users ... Kim stands at 30%. Kylie is clearly still winning, but we're told there has been a steady and continued narrowing of the gap, and Kim could overtake Kylie in days.

Kim -- who does not like losing to anyone -- has turned up the heat. She's posted ass-shots and other hot pics on her various social media platforms, driving fans to her app.

The app source who's worked with the family says Kim knows how to use social media better than anyone in her family -- Kylie included -- and when she wants to win, she'll win. And she wants to win.

Kim posted a video with Kylie promising to pass on the media torch and teach her all of her tricks. Our advice to Kylie? Michael Jordan used that trick before with the youngins ... and it worked every time.

Kylie Jenner hosted a party for her best friend Wednesday where a cake was carted out with the message, "Happy Birthday N****."

Kylie is taking heat for the frosted message, but she now says the cake pictured below is the one she got ... not the one above.

Kylie's BFF, Jordyn Woods, is African-American -- not that it necessarily matters -- and says she really DID get the n-word cake from "friends."

Kylie and Tyga are finally ready to tie the knot ... at least that's what one video suggested -- but Tyga might've just been brushing up on his impressions.

Kylie posted a video to her Snapchat on Wednesday of her bf Tyga and it sounds like he says, "I don't f*** with nobody, it's just me, my fiancée, this lil' dog I just got" ... making it seem like he and Kylie are engaged.

However, if you dig a little deeper -- Tyga posted a video earlier in the day of an old interview with rapper Logic saying almost the exact same thing.

So we're callin' shenanigans.

Kim Kardashian's learned a thing or two about fighting inflation ... of her ankles during pregnancy -- and let's just say she won't get fooled again.

Kim cruised out of her San Diego hotel and for once, chose comfort over fashion ... because in full public view she was wearing fuzzy slippers.

Looks like the run of the mill, hotel spa-issued slippers too -- and NOT couture!

There's a very simple reason why roughly 6-months pregnant Kim is dressing down. Who can forget the great ankle crisis of 2013?

Kylie Jenner went out and about sporting an unusual disguise -- her own face!! The 18-year-old was damn near unrecognizable while car shopping in Calabasas.

The zero make-up transformation is a stunning look at what really lies beneath her typical super glam look: Just a kid.

Kim and Khloe Kardashian, along with mama Kris Jenner, took a trip to San Diego Tuesday to get tested to see if they carried a genetic cancerous gene.

The women, accompanied by Dr. Paul Nassif from "Botched," went to Pathway Genomics, a company that tests for BRCA1 ... a gene mutation that causes a high likelihood of breast and ovarian cancer.

Angelina Jolie famously had preventive surgery after she tested positive. They were also tested for heart disease and diabetes.

The patriarch of Kim's family -- Robert Kardashian -- died of cancer at 59.

Kylie Jenner's been on a 3 year campaign to get revenge on a teenage girl she considered a rival for Jaden Smith's affection ... according to legal docs which read like an episode of "Gossip Girl."

In the docs, 17-year-old Chelsea Clark says Kylie was pissed because Jaden wanted to get with Chelsea. She says Kylie called her and said, "Leave my boyfriend alone cause you will never be like me."

Clark says Kylie then had people follow her and sent threatening messages to her over social media. She says at one point Kylie said, "This is war."

The alleged conspiracy gets even darker ... because, in the docs, Clark says she hurt her back in a car accident which she believes Kylie masterminded.

Clark requested a temporary restraining order, but it was denied. The court asked her to bring the threatening messages to court on Monday, but she was a no-show. There's a hearing scheduled for Oct. 9.

Kylie's camp tells us she's never heard of Clark and has no idea who she is.

Sources close to Jaden tell us he doesn't know who Clark is either.

Kylie Jenner dropped major stacks to have her favorite fancy Bev Hills restaurant come to her, just because she caught a case of the lazy Sundays.

Kylie was craving Philippe Chow -- the uber popular Chinese restaurant -- but didn't feel like trekking 45 minutes from her Calabasas pad, especially not on Sunday Funday. So instead, she opted for take-out ... the ultra rich way.

We're told KJ dropped $5k to have Philippe Chow send a private chef to feed 5-10 friends.

Nothing too fancy on the menu -- fried rice and chicken and shrimp satay. Normies ordering at the restaurant only drop about $10.95 for fried rice, and $15.95 for the satay ... so $5,000 = leftovers!

Someone's really getting used to having money to burn ... or sautée.

Kris Jenner just took a big step in her relationship with Corey Gamble, who played faux dad for a day with Kourtney Kardashian's kids.

Kylie Jenner was the victim of a nasty attack Friday night after one fan pulled her hair, snapping her head back.

Jenner was leaving the Chris Brown concert in Anaheim when the incident took place -- you can tell by the look on Kylie's face, it was painful.

Luckily her security stepped in quickly and Kylie continued on her way.

Hair-pull aside, Kylie had an awesome time watching her bf Tyga perform with CB.

Kylie Jenner's in crisis ... how can an 18-year-old social media queen exist without a fully functional iPhone.

That was her dilemma Friday night as she went to The Nice Guy in West Hollywood with Tyga for dinner. Her screen is all cracked up.

Khloe Kardashian is gonna mess around and get someone at Adidas a GIANT well-deserved bonus check -- based purely on her ass.

Kanye West just launched his Yeezy Season 2 collection at a surprise show for NYFW and if pale colors aren't your thing, you'll probably wanna look away.

West brought plenty of star power to the show ... Kim Kardashian sat front row beside Anna Wintour. Khloe, Kendall and Kourtney were there and Kylie walked in the show. As for North, she held it together much better than earlier this year, when she threw a fit during Ye's premiere.

Kanye is showing the collection release in movie theaters across the U.S., you know, for everyone who isn't an A-lister.