WWE Puts the Squeeze on Man Nipples

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Nipplegate 2008 has broken out in Florida! Wrestlers John Cena, Triple H, Randy Orton and Big Show are all proudly baring their nipple-free chests on a huge banner in downtown Orlando. Wait, what?

City officials met with some WWE suits to figure out how to keep the wrestling poster from looking "too provocative." The outcome - the WWE slammed, er, airbrushed the nipples into oblivion. Billboard malfunction!

Nikki Sixx & Kat Von D: Love Inks!

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With matching Manic Panic shag 'dos, prerequisite his and hers rocker eyeliner, and oh so tired i'm-edgy-because-i-wear-black-nail-polish, 49-year-old Frank Carlton Serafino Feranna, Jr (aka Nikki Sixx) and 26-year-old girlfriend Katherine Von Drachenberg (aka "L.A. Ink" star Kat Von D) are tatted up beyond all recognition -- from each other! Tattoo you!

Considering that after only dating for a month, Kat had the name of her ex-boyfriend -- Alexander Orbi Lee Kelton Orbison -- tattooed onto her skin, there's no doubt this newfangled relationship will last ... about as long as a Motley Crüe song!

UPDATE: On his MySpace blog, Orbi says he and Kat dated up until the last week of February, claims she begged him to marry her, and even calls her a "psychopath." No hard feelings.

Hang with Obama In Bed!

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Yes we can - cuddle together.

Doll company Herobuilders has created an 8-inch tall Barack Obama doll. Unlike the life-sized version, the creepy looking, pint-sized presidential hopeful does not come with a guarantee to bring about real change in Washington.

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What a Waste Of $40,000!

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One man bid $40,100 for one "meet and greet" with Scarlett Johansson at a film premiere.

Sure, the money goes to charity, but that same amount of cash could buy 40 dates with Gov. Eliot Spitzer's hot hooker -- and she's a sure thing!

Talk about more bang for your buck!

'Top Model' Gets Deneezied From Snoop's Bash

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Lanky Jaslene Gonzalez, "America's Next Top Model" cycle 8 winner, was flat-out denied from Snoop Dogg's "Ego Trippin" album release party at Touch in NYC last night. The Covergirl tried to be easy, breezy, and beautiful - but after posing and strutting for paps, Miss "ANTM" was still not allowed past the velvet rope. Awkward!

Jermaine Dupri and Snoop Dogg both arrived after the incident, and pimps walked right into the club. Well ... it was the Doggfather's party.

When asked about the situation - Lizzie Grubman, Jaslene's publicist, told TMZ "Why wouldn't they let a beautiful supermodel in -- it's news to me!"

No word yet from Snoop's reps.

'Sexy Red Wine' Makes Bai Feel So Fine

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Bai Ling celebrated pleading guilty to disturbing the peace by drinking a big 'ol glass of wine. Thatta girl!

In her wacked-out mess of a blog, Bai writes, "Theft dismissed! yes! This is it! All the darkness went away, the sunlight really come back to me with a huge smile right now dance in my trailer Yes! Yes! Yes! I will drink a sexy red wine tonight after my filming and celebrate. I am smiling for real!"

She was ordered to pay a fine of several hundred dollars after allegedly stealing $16.22 from an airport convenience store. With all this taken care of, Ling can resume her busy, chicken-dancing schedule.

There's No Way in Hell Bai Wrote This

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In her most recent blog, Bai Ling called her alleged pilfering of $16.22 worth of goods from an airport "an innocent mistake." So now she's making sense?? Doubtful.

The chicken-dancer extraordinaire adds that she is "confident that the truth will be told since I never had any intention of taking items without paying for them." Riiiight.

Using words like "infraction" and "misdemeanor charges," the statement lacks such trademark Ling-isms as "Dusts like the stars dancing in a slow motion shines the sunlight."

Snoop Dogg to TMZ: I'm Not Your Bitch, Bitch!

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Snoop Dogg's gonna stop using the word bitch? What's the hizzle?!?

D-oh-double-G was at the Hip-Hop Summit Action Awards in New York last night, when TMZ asked the Doggfather if he was going to give up using the word. If he does, the world won't ever be the same.

Jen Garner Suffers Gary Abusey

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Gary Busey hijacked Ryan Seacrest's interview with Jennifer Garner and Laura Linney -- and planted a creepy kiss on a visibly shocked Garner's neck!

It's classic, watch 'em squirm. Garner couldn't bring herself to say Busey's name, referring to him as "this man."

Lil' Kim Changes Her Racial Makeup

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After momentarily going Asian, Lil' Kim has done it again and changed races. She's now an Oompa Loompa!

The 32-year-old ex-con gave new meaning to the term Lady Marmalade on Thursday -- by showing up to a NYC event in a lovely shade of Donatella orange. The girl needs to learn how to blend. Trust.

Prince Charles Meet Scarlett's Boobs

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His Royal Highness Prince Charles greeted Scarlett Johansson at the London premiere of her new film on Tuesday and was clearly enamored by her natural endowment ... as an actress.

Johansson's co-stars, Eric Bana and Natalie Portman, watched as the Prince stood mesmerized.

Ling Leaves Out a Few Details

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Bai Ling found time to blog -- and post pictures! -- about her trip to LAX yesterday ... conveniently leaving out the part where she was arrested for allegedly pilfering $16 worth of merchandise from an airport store. Um ... is this thing on?

Underneath pictures of herself at the Southwest terminal at LAX, she writes, "Delayed the flight, wondring [sic] again in the airport like a ghost, why can't I just be the sun smile? My heart is a little sad now, casted by the melody of life ..."

She posted again this morning with a Valentine's Day message. Earth to Bai.

Kat Von D -- Next Mel Gibson?

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Upon being fired from "Miami Ink" last year, tattoo artist Kat Von D allegedly signed a photograph addressed to her former boss, Ami James, and drew a swastika and a flaming Star of David on it. Subtle, no?

TMZ has obtained the photograph in question, a headshot of Kat that reads, "Burn in hell Jewbag." No one witnessed Kat write the message, but Chris Garver, another tattoo artist on "Miami Ink," tells TMZ Kat personally handed him the photo.

Pharrell's Big Fat Jewish Wedding!

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Drop the knish like it's hot! Pharrell, rapper and producer extraordinaire, was driving around Miami when he happened upon a big Jewish Orthodox wedding -- so he got in on the party!

The wedding between Rachel and Tuvia Lind took place last month at a private residence in Miami Beach. Pharrell spotted men dancing in the front yard and stopped to watch -- when he was invited to participate! It's a simcha, bitches!

Jessica Simpson and Two Angels Hookers in Moscow?

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They may be big name A-listers in America, but Victoria's Secret models Karolina Kurkova and Alessandra Ambrosio, and even Jessica Simpson are merely women of the night -- in Russia!

In the naughty section of the Moscow Times are ads for escorts, complete with photos -- of these three stars! According to the ad, Kurkova's working name is Kristina, Ambrosio's is Masha and both are available 24 hours a day. Hot damn! If it's really Jessica, that would explain why her name is Lena; it has only two syllables -- something she'd be able to remember.

Bai Ling Raps Yes, Raps

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A thankful Bai Ling is back from the jungle and she has stories to tell -- bring your own interpreter.

TMZ's favorite nipple-baring wacktress was at Mr. Chow last night, talking about rivers, meat and monkeys in the Amazon, rapping (if repeating the same two words over and over can be considered rapping) about her new movie, "Southland Tales" and showing off some killer new moves she picked up in Brazil.

It's no crazy chicken, but entertaining nonetheless.