You Might Want to Rethink

Lindsay Lohan celebrated the advent of a Monday night by hitting up at three fiestas in just a single evening, an astonishing feat of fetes, even for the rehabbed party princess.

La Lohan's first stop was a celebration of the premiere of Showtime's "The Tudors" at Les Deux, where she was photographed getting close to fellow rehabber, Robbie Williams.

Linds then traveled with a few girlfriends to new celeb hotspot Winston's, before taking off and heading to a house party in the Pacific Palisades. Monday is just one more day of the weekend, people!

While Jenna was never exactly Kirstie Alley, for this look she seems to have become some amalgam of Kelly Ripa, Nicole Richie and a standard-issue local affiliate blonde anchorwoman.

Please Jenna, for the love of testosterone, bring back the buxom bodaciousness of yesteryear ... or even last year!

Dressed to the Ca-nines in a Grimace-purple, Mrs. Roper maternity muumuu, unfortunate black shorts with matching Mary-Kate Olsen black tights, and a pair of two-toned purple and white pumps -- Mischa looks ready to walk the high fashion runways ... of the Westminster Kennel Club! Arf!

Mischa really ought to have this look put down!

BREAKING NEWS: A judge has ordered that the rights to the scotched O.J. Simpson tell-all, "If I Did It," are to be sold at auction to help fund a civil judgment against the Bronco buster, which means it could soon see the light of your local Barnes & Noble after all.

(That's assuming the McSweeney's musical version of "If I Did It" didn't whet your appetite.)

It's certainly a disgusting turn of events and an impossible situation for the Goldman family, which fought to prevent the book's sale, when it turned out that the Juicy One would profit from it; they now find themselves in the unenviable position of having to promulgate Simpson's lurid recollections in order to ever see a dime from him.

Where could such a book come from? Only from ex ReganBooks publisher Judith Regan, who's the subject of the most excoriating piece by Micahel Wolff in recent memory, in this month's Vanity Fair.

Viz, According to Wolff, Regan represents..."the psychopathology of the media -- its shameless self-promoters, so without a moral center, so motivated by their own grandiosity and need for attention, that they have bankrupted the culture..."

After nearly 20 years, former teen popstar Debbie Deborah Gibson is still stuck at her 1988 Long Island prom! Sadly, this taffeta catastrophe isn't only in her dreams!

With her "Electric Youth" on the fritz, the 36-year-old arrived at a Foundation for Facial Reconstruction charity event in New York on Monday draped in a coral sheath -- which appears to have been acquired at a "Dancing with the Stars" rummage sale.

The 56-year-old former 70s heartthrob was across the pond signing copies of his new memoir, "Could It Be Forever - My Story," while the magically recuperated Roy popped up last week at Elizabeth Taylor's 75th birthday bash in Las Vegas!

C'mon get happy!

The pleasantly plump Oscar show scribe arrived to the ACLU Pride Partnership Awards on Thursday, sporting his usual Sally Jessy Raphael glasses, his standard ironic t-shirt, and a new Virgie Arthur shag!

Her name is Niecy Nash, but last night, it was all about Niecy's ASS!

The comedian showed off her, er, biggest asset in a tortured one-piece thong swimsuit -- at the Hollywood premiere of her new film, "Reno 911: Miami." Baby got back and den sum!

Since Nash plays a cop in the film, this should be the first bum she gets off the street!

The usually fashion-friendly Drew left a British Airways flight wearing gaudy silver headphones, frightful white 80s glasses (at night), and a hippie-lacious combination of Indian scarf, 2003 Ugg boots and a puffy-sleeved pea coat. Phone home!

The actress crossed the pond for press engagements with co-star Hugh Grant for their new flick, "Music and Lyrics."

The cocktail-clasping chanteuse celebrated her 23rd birthday at NYC hotspot Katra on Monday, sporting smeared linebacker eyeliner leftover from the Super Bowl, and a layered satin 80s dress straight out of Molly Ringwald's prom line. Aubrey should have gone with pretty in pink instead.

From Oksana Baiul to Prince, check out which celebs should have been tackled for their fashion fumbles.

Since appearing on "American Idol" three years ago, 19-year-old Diana DeGarmo has grown up right before our eyes ... into a 42-year-old soccer mom! Anyone want a juice box?

DeGarmo arrived at a book signing in New York this week, looking twice her age in a mid-90s menopause red 'Rachel' bob, and enough pancake to smother her entire "Hairspray" cast.

Unless DeGarmo is interested in reporting the news on Telemundo, she might want to ease up on the RuPaul rouge. Work it, mija!

Danny Bonaduce has joined Matthew McConaughey's shirtless sisterhood. Two snaps up!

In what can only be described as the most calculated nip slip since Janet Jackson's Super Bowl fiasco, the 'Duce showed up topless to yet another red carpet event on Wednesday, this time for Podfitness.com's TV launch party. In October, the former "Partridge Family" star hit a Halloween party and exposed his ripped and freckled man-boobs for all the world to see.

The 26-year-old Gothy gamine has been spotted at various "Casino Royale" premieres around the world sporting ghastly manes that appear to be bloodcurdling homages to Morticia Addams and The Bride of Frankenstein. Boo!

Sadly, even the Rosie O'Donnell-spawned man-bob would be an improvement over Green's macabre bird's nest bristles.

Kate masqueraded as a wayward Olsen twin, dressed like a homeless Gremlin in boots and sunglasses on its way to lunch at the London branch of Nobu on Monday -- don't get her wet!