Nurse!

The Colts weren't the only people who got their butts whooped in Indianapolis last night ... Chris Brown fell HARD on his ass during an Indy concert ... but unlike the NFL team, Chris actually recovered.

"Biggest Loser" competitor Sam Poueu -- who was listed in critical condition after falling several stories from a fire escape this month -- is making some serious progress in his recovery and has been upgraded to stable, TMZ has learned.

We're told doctors are still wary because Sam's status could change at any moment -- but overall, everyone's excited by his progress.

As we previously reported, Sam was celebrating a friend's birthday when he accidentally locked himself on the roof -- and fell several stories while trying to climb down a fire escape.

"Fantasy Factory" star Scott "Big Cat" Pfaff hasn't been to the dentist in 10 years -- and this week, he's gonna pay for it big time ... with multiple painful procedures.

Pfaff finally ended his decade-long dental sabbatical a few days ago -- and we're told the mouth doc immediately spotted multiple cavities ... and several teeth that need to be pulled.

Sources close to Big Cat tell us, he also has to get a root canal asap -- and the first of several pain-filled visits is scheduled for this week.

Don't forget to floss.

TMZ has learned ... Halle Berry broke her foot in Spain this morning, and it's creating problems for the movie she's shooting.

Sources tell TMZ ... Halle was on the property where she's staying and simply took a misstep. She heard a crack and then felt the pain. Halle went to the hospital, where doctors put her foot in a cast. She was taken out of the hospital in a wheelchair.

As for the movie she's currently shooting -- "Cloud Atlas" -- sources say the immediate plan is to shoot around her. We're told that will be a combination of things -- shooting her from the waist up, using a stunt double, and shooting scenes for the next week or two in which Halle does not appear.

"Biggest Loser" contestant Sam Poueu made "a really loud crash" when he fell from a building earlier this month ...this according to the woman who saw him lying on the ground and called 911.

TMZ has obtained the 911 call placed moments after Zsa Zsa Gabor's husband Prince Frederic von Anhalt was run over by a car in Bev Hills this month -- and based on the phone call, Von Ahole wasn't moving much after the accident.

According to the caller, a silver Honda was responsible for the collision -- leveling Ahole in the middle of the street ... and leaving him with an injured leg.

John Mayer is canceling two concerts and postponing his album until next year because he's having problems with his vocal cords.

Mayer revealed the problem on his blog, saying he had developed a granuloma in his throat. Granulomas are nodules, and they vary from harmless to very serious. John didn't elaborate.

He was scheduled to perform at the iheartradio Music Festival in Las Vegas next week and a show with Tony Bennett in Los Angeles.

Mayer also said his next album, which was due later this year, will now be pushed back to 2012.

He says he'll devote his time to "writing and composing more music and kicking an empty soup can around the West Village."

"LA Ink" star Ruthless was rushed to an L.A. hospital this week after a taxi she was riding in smashed into another car ... and then backed into TWO MORE vehicles -- TMZ has learned.

TMZ spoke with 26-year-old Ruth "Ruthless" Pineda ... who says her cabbie jumped out of the car to check out the damage after the initial collision ... but for some reason, the taxi was IN REVERSE!!!

The cabbie quickly jumped back in the taxi and tried to slam on the brake -- but he was so flustered, that he accidentally hit the gas ... sending the car roaring back into two parked cars.

Ruthless says she was rushed to a nearby hospital ... where she was treated for neck and back injuries. She was released the next day ... but tells us, "I'm still in a lot of pain but recovering"

Pineda has had some bad luck with cars lately -- as we previously reported Ruthless was also hospitalized a few months ago when a semi truck slammed into her Mercedes.

It was Sean Penn to the rescue today ... when his assistant fell down in the shower and messed up her arm ... and the actor rushed her to urgent care.

Sources close to the actor tell TMZ ... Penn's assistant was taking a shower at Sean's Malibu home when she fell ... and popped out her elbow.

Sean wrapped her up in a towel and took her to a nearby urgent care facility.

Sean and his girlfriend, Shannon Costello, (below) were clearly upset as they waited while the assistant was being treated.

Wrestling icon Rowdy Roddy Piper says doctors at UCLA are about to slash his neck open and take a hammer and a chisel to his neck bones ... after discovering he's been wrestling with a BROKEN NECK.

57-year-old Piper went to his Twitter and explained he had been experiencing neck pain for quite a while -- but didn't think it was a big deal. In fact, he says he was WRESTLING through the pain for the past couple of months.

But Piper says he got an MRI recently -- and when the docs saw the results, they went into "911 mode" -- and scheduled a surgery as quickly as they could.

"So just for the record," Piper explains, "I beat, The Miz, Terry Funk, and 2 others guys with a broken neck!!"

Piper says he's going under the knife in just a few hours -- but tells his fans, "There [sic] using all the smarts they have at UCLA. I SAY BRING IT ON! CUT DEEP!!! I'M NOT AFRAID!!"

The "Biggest Loser" contestant who was seriously injured after he plummeted several stories from a building last week was trying to climb down a fire escape when he slipped and fell ... this according to his fiancee.

TMZ broke the story, Season 9 competitor Sam Poueu was listed in critical condition after the Sept. 3 incident ... and now fiancee Stephanie Anderson told People.com the whole thing happened because he got locked out on the roof of his friend's apartment.

It all went down in San Francisco, as Poueu was celebrating a friend's birthday -- when he went up to the roof by himself and the door locked behind him.

Anderson says Poueu "attempted to climb down the fire escape ladder to drop down into the fourth floor balcony and slipped."

"Last Dragon" star Leo O'Brien was in good mood when he spotted him in NYC yesterday -- and considering he was shot two times just a few days earlier ... it's not hard to see why.

As TMZ first reported, O'Brien was shot on September 5 in Harlem, NY for no apparent reason.

Ricki Lake is learning the hard way ... dancing HURTS -- and today she hobbled out of the "Dancing with the Stars" studio sporting one hell of a bruise on her shin.

Lake tweeted, "Not sure how my bruise turned into a medic showing up? I'm fine!!"

Our spies at "Dancing" tell us Ricki is actually one of the best dancers ... and judging from the nature of the injury, it looks like it won't cramp her style.

Moments ago, Lake explained her boo boo to TMZ ... saying, "I injured myself yesterday by hitting my heel into my shin ... I'm fine."

One of the contestants from "Biggest Loser" Season 9 is listed in critical condition at a San Francisco hospital, TMZ has learned -- after plummeting several stories from a building on September 3rd.

It's unclear how he fell -- but sources close to Sam Poueu tell us ... he suffered a pelvic injury, torn ligaments, a punctured lung, and a broken leg during the accident.

According to sources, Sam -- who was a fan favorite on the show last year -- is currently recovering in the ICU -- but while he's listed in critical condition, we're told he can still recognize visitors.

Reese Witherspoon was rushed to a Santa Monica hospital around 11am this morning, after a car struck the actress while she was jogging.

Law enforcement tells TMZ, Reese's injuries were very minor -- nothing life-threatening.

According to law enforcement, the driver was an 84-year-old woman. We're told Reese was crossing the street at the time of the accident ... and the driver failed to stop.

The driver was cited for failure to yield to a pedestrian and released.

Evan Rachel Wood took a serious shot to the face last night in Europe -- in the form of a wild elbow that actually KNOCKED OUT one of her teeth ... TMZ has learned.

Sources close to Wood tell us, the actress was hanging out with some friends in Paris -- and decided to hit up some local spot with music and dancing.

We're told one of the dancers at the establishment got a little loose with the elbows -- and accidentally connected with Wood's mouth, knocking out a tooth ... and giving her one fat lip.

Wood -- who's traveling the world to promote her new movie "Ides of March" and her HBO miniseries "Mildred Pierce" -- will continue on the tour ... but sources tell us she's already meeting with a dentist to get a replacement tooth.

FYI -- it's Evan Rachel's birthday today. Happy birthday!!!