Party All The Time

Patrick Schwarzenegger used a FAKE ID to get into a Hollywood club this weekend ... and was only kicked out after he pelted the house DJ with ice cubes ... sources connected to the club tell TMZ.

We're told ... Arnold's kid -- who's only 19 years old -- used someone else's driver's license to get past the bouncers at The Sayers Club in L.A. on Saturday night ... and it worked.

But once he was inside, we're told Patrick was a total pain in the ass.

Sources tell us Patrick was rowdy and obnoxious ... and at one point, he began throwing ice cubes at the DJ. (His father did play Mr. Freeze, after all).

Once the ice began to fly, we're told club honchos recognized Patrick -- realized he was underage -- and kicked him out ASAP.

After he got the boot, TMZ shot footage of Patrick ranting about wanting to beat up the DJ.

Patrick wasn't arrested -- but using a fake ID is a misdemeanor in California, punishable by up to a year in jail and a $1,000 fine.

His father probably knew that already ... since, you know, he was the governor.

Patrick Schwarzenegger won't be back ... to The Sayers Club ... 'cause Arnold's 19-year-old son was KICKED OUT of the nightclub on Saturday and threatened to "beat the f**k out of the DJ" ... and TMZ has the footage.

Our cameras were rolling outside the club Saturday night ... when Patrick went on the rampage, bitching about the DJ to anyone who would listen.

"I'm gonna go beat the f**k out of the DJ," he told a group of friends while outside the club.

He then continued complaining to another friend, "Everyone around me wants to beat the f**k out of the DJ ... [it sounds like Patrick says 'gay boy'] ... I'll beat the f**k out of him."

"He kicks everybody out of his table, losing money for the club, losing money for the owner."

It's unclear WHY Patrick was kicked out of the club ... or even why he was allowed INSIDE the club in the first place, considering he's only 19.

But as Patrick tries to get into an SUV to leave the scene, he's DENIED by the driver -- and Patrick proceeds to condescendingly wave his hand in the driver's face. Another diva moment.

You know who WASN'T kicked out of a nightclub Saturday night? Joseph Baena.

Lindsay Lohan claims she isn't a big drinker and has only done cocaine "maybe four or five" times ... but boy does she love herself some ecstasy.

Lohan sat down with Piers Morgan late last month for an interview that just appeared in the Daily Mail and if you believe her ... we're all crazy, because she doesn't really have a drug or alcohol problem.

Here are the highlights:

-- She got advice about controlling her drinking from Heath Ledger. He told her he had given up drinking for a full year so she took his advice. She says she has no prob giving up alcohol.

-- She hasn't taken a drug (other than her prescriptions) in a year.

-- She's not an alcoholic and can give up drinking.

-- She's taken cocaine "maybe 4 or 5 times in my life."

-- She likes ecstasy better than other drugs.

-- She does not think she needs to be in lockdown rehab for three months.

-- She thinks rehab will be good for her because it gives people time to just be by themselves.

-- She's straight.

-- She calls Dina "mum."

So we gotta ask ...

With Rihanna in New York City on her Diamonds World Tour, Chris Brown celebrated his birthday at Emerson nightclub in Hollywood ... with ex Karrueche Tran in attendance.

We're told Karrueche -- Chris' other on-again/off-again girlfriend -- was invited by Chris himself to the party (thrown by ZING Vodka and Black Pyramid) to celebrate Chris turning 24. Our sources say the two still talk often and hang out, and that she still cares about Chris very much.

Here's to hoping some combination of these crazy kids can make it work.

Master P is blaming his birthday flash mob meltdown on Ashton Kutcher ... telling TMZ he thought he was being "Punk'd." Seriously ...

Problem is ... Ashton wasn't there and had NOTHING to do with the botched surprise party.

You remember the scene ... Master P and his son Romeo stormed away from the surprise birthday dancing flash mob organized specifically for the No Limit founder in L.A. last week.

At the time, one of the organizers chased after P and begged him to stay ... but the rapper ignored her pleas and hightailed it outta there anyway.

But last night on his way into Mr. Chow, P seemed to realize he overreacted -- and THANKED the real people behind the surprise (friends and loved ones). He also offered up his "Punk'd" conspiracy theory. Ya gotta hear it.

"Nobody ever did that for me before," Master P said.

... and after the way he reacted, we're guessing no one will ever do it again.

Tara Reid is no fan of Lindsay Lohan ... and Lindsay Lohan ain't too fond of Tara either ... so says the "American Pie" star.

Tara hosted "TMZ on TV" yesterday ... and told us she and LiLo have some serious issues, despite the fact they run in the same social circles.

"We don't really like each other that much," Reid said ... "If I get drunk, I'm a happy drunk. When she gets drunk, she's just mean."

Tara even gives examples.

Still, Reid believes Lohan will eventually get her life back on track ... because people keep giving her "chance after chance after chance after chance."

With less than a week to go until her court-ordered stint in rehab, Lindsay Lohan hit the NYC bar scene Monday night ... AND ACTUALLY BEHAVED HERSELF!!!

TMZ has learned ... Lohan spent her Monday evening at The Bitter End -- the piano bar credited with giving Lady Gaga her start back in the day.

Sources at the bar tell us ... Lohan rolled in to the place with 9 or 10 friends to watch some of her pals perform at a "Jam Fest" event.

We're told Lindsay sat quietly at her table for roughly 3 hours and didn't suck down one drop of alcohol -- just soda.

One source inside the bar tells us Lohan was so "very well behaved" ... people in the joint barely even noticed the actress.

As for Lindsay, she's expected to enter a treatment center in the Hamptons on May 2 -- where she's supposed to complete a 90-day program.

Chris Brown might despise Drake with a passion, but even CB can't resist dancing when one of his songs comes on at the club.

Brown and Drake have been beefing for a while now -- peaking last June with a massive club fight, reportedly over Rihanna.

CB was hosting a party at Stage 48 in NYC earlier this month and apparently the DJ had no fear at all ... and played a Drake song, "Started From the Bottom." Rather than react (how do we say this nicely?) poorly ... CB simply got down like it was his favorite jam in the world.

Master P hates flash mobs ... HATES THEM ... at least, it seemed that way when he stormed away from a mob that was organized especially for his birthday yesterday ... and TMZ got the whole thing on tape.

P was enjoying a nice relaxing lunch with his son Romeo in Santa Monica ... when a flash mob broke out right in front of Master P's table.

But Mr. P clearly wasn't amused ... and right in the middle of the performance (during a Gangnam Style routine), the No Limit founder got out of his seat and beelined it for the exit, clearly upset.

As he left the restaurant, a woman connected to the event chased after P and begged him to come back ... saying, "Don't leave ... it's your birthday."

The woman also told P the name of the person who organized the event in the hopes P would have a change of heart ... but P didn't care, and continued to storm off.

On his way out, we commented to P, "That didn't go like they planned, huh?"

His response -- "Nah, it did not."

So, why was P so pissed off? We're trying to find out ... maybe he just isn't a fan of Psy?

STRIP CLUBS AND DOLLAR BILLS!!! Rihanna sings from experience ... because last weekend in Miami, she dropped $8,000 on stripper booty -- and we got video.

Sources at Miami's mega-strip joint King of Diamonds tell TMZ, RiRi stopped in early Sunday morning, and rained down eight grand on several dancers, including a girl named Remy Redd ... one of the biggest strippers in KOD (in more ways than one).

We're told Rihanna dropped by to see how the girls move to her music -- and ended up staying for two-and-a-half hours.

Johnny Manziel may still be riding high on his Heisman win -- but insists the trophy is no pothead ... despite a photo circulating on the Internet.

The Texas A&M quarterback was photographed kissing his hardware this past weekend in Vegas, and it looks like Heisman is carrying a big fat blunt.

But Johnny says the photo's a fake! He just tweeted: "ABSOLUTELY PHOTOSHOPPED. People are always out to get me...sorry for kissing my trophy."

Then again ... Johnny football does like to party hard.

So, we've gotta ask ...

Ozzy Osbourne celebrated his 49th day of sobriety by rocking out HARD -- we're talkin' crotch-thrusting, hardcore headbanging, and running around a stage like a maniac ... and it was awesome.

Osbourne -- who's 64 years old -- performed with Black Sabbath in New Zealand on Saturday ... just days after coming clean about his private struggle with drugs and alcohol.

We broke the story, Ozzy's wife Sharon decided to separate from the rock star after learning he'd fallen off the wagon -- and said she wouldn't come back until he was sober for several months.

Snoop Dogg's 4/20 party in Hollywood was shut down before the star of the show even arrived ... TMZ has learned.

"Snoop Lion 420 Festival" -- a giant party being held in a Hollywood Hills mansion to celebrate all things cannabis -- started at 11:00 AM ... but quickly crashed and burned thanks to a bunch of fuddy-duddy neighbors.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ ... multiple neighbors in the surrounding area complained about the noise levels and parking situation caused by hoards of weed-loving partygoers. The fact that the party didn't have a permit didn't help matters either.

Cops arrived and quickly shut it down, putting a kibosh on the all-night festivities.

Our sources say no one was cited.

We're told Snoop arrived to the party just as it was being shut down. Our sources say Snoop spoke to police and was incredibly cooperative and understood why the party was being shut down.

Lindsay Lohan stuck to her guns this weekend at Coachella ... telling TMZ, she followed through on her promise NOT to take a sip of booze the entire weekend -- AND WHY WOULD SHE LIE????

Lindsay was out in Malibu earlier today when we asked if she stayed clean as a whistle at the booze-filled drug-infested music festival?

We also asked about her favorite Coachella act ... and what her favorite non-alcoholic drink is? She actually answers.

Miley Cyrus is blazin' a trail for millions of young women in America ... it's actually a trail of smoke that makes you really hazy and giggly.

She's not hiding it anymore ... no more, "It's not marijuana, it's Salvia." The smoke sesh went down Sunday night at Greystone Manor in Hollywood.

Greystone is turning into the go-to ganja joint ... Rihanna was toking a fat one a week earlier.

Liam and Miley have a lot in common ... except her hunger game ends with a bag of Cheetos.

Lindsay Lohan insists she was clean as a whistle at Coachella ... navigating around the muddy waters of drugs and booze.

LiLo is telling friends ... she didn't drink an ounce of alcohol and stayed clear of all drugs ... even though people all around her were getting high.

So why should we believe her, because frequently we don't? Here's the thing. There are NO pics that have surfaced of Lindsay partying, and whenever she does ... something gets out.

In fact ... we know Lindsay was invited to numerous parties and we checked with people who attended -- and could remember -- and no one saw her.

Lindsay is telling her friends she turned in by 10 PM both nights during the weekend.

Raising the question ... why bother going?