The Kardashians

Kim Kardashian is NOT the mystery buyer trying to yank her infamous sex tape off the market -- this according to Vivid honcho Steve Hirsch, the man who currently owns the tape.

Hirsch tells TMZ, he still doesn't know who the mystery buyer is -- but a rep for the interested party insists ... it ain't Kim ... or anyone even remotely associated with Kim.

Steve tells us, "It made sense the entire time it would be Kim, but it appears it’s not.”

According to Steve, the buyer will reveal his identity if the deal gets done -- and explain once and for all why he/she wants to pull the tape from the market.

Steve says he met with the buyer's rep several times in the last week -- but the buyer's still several million dollars short of Hirsch's $30 million asking price.

Kim Kardashian plus DJ Pauly D plus Fashion's Night Out equals an insane crowd that forced cops to shut down DASH NYC last night.

As TMZ first reported, Pauly D agreed to work the party at the Kardashians' store in NYC ... for free ... as a wedding gift to Kim and Kris Humphries.

According to sources inside the store ... NYPD had to step in when the crowd of thousands tried to jump the barricades to get to Pauly as he left the store.

We're told cops made the Kardashian sisters and all their employees leave the store and turn off all the lights -- essentially telling the crazed fans, "You ain't got to go home, but ..."

Rob Kardashian has a nasty case of pre-dance jitters -- and it's starting to piss off his "Dancing with the Stars" partner.

Sources close to the show tell us Rob is very nervous and has refused to rehearse longer than 2 hours with Cheryl Burke -- while most of the contestants are logging more than 5 hour practices.

We're told Cheryl is "fed up" with what she perceives to be Rob's lack of interest in the show.

But Rob is still talking a big game ... because we're told he's bragging constantly to big sis Kim that he will top her 'DWTS' performance by making it past week 3.

Note to Rob: You don't have Kim's "assets." Get to practice.

Pauly D wasn't invited to Kim Kardashian's extravagant wedding -- but that didn't stop him from giving her a gift that is valued at $40,000 ... kind of.

According to our sources, Pauly was approached by Kim to DJ an event at her DASH store in NYC for Fashion's Night Out, the biggest event during Fashion Week.

We're told Pauly agreed to do the gig ... and even agreed to wave his appearance fee as a wedding present. He usually gets $40,000 per appearance.

Kim Kardashian's husband is well aware of his wife's XXX past ... but sources close to Kris Humphries tell us, "He could care less about the sex tape."

In fact, we're told Kris truly had "no idea" who Ray J was when Kim's sex tape partner sat next to the NBA star on a recent flight from L.A. to New Orleans.

But after a few hours on the plane, Ray J finally approached Kris and said, "Come on, You know who I am ... I just want to say congratulations." Kris reportedly replied, "Oh yeah, yeah I know who you are."

Sources close to Humphries tell us, "Kris really didn't know who he was" ... but once Ray J reminded him, it didn't matter to him because Kris is simply not bothered by Kim and Ray J's previous relationship.

Ray J -- the other person featured in the Kim Kardashian sex tape -- says he "absolutely" wants the footage off the market ... but claims it's worth WAY MORE than $30 million.

As TMZ first reported, a mystery buyer has contacted Vivid Entertainment looking to purchase the rights to the tape so they can make it go away forever.

Kim Kardashian dragged new hubby Kris Humphries along to tape her reality show in NYC and you could almost see him thinking ... "What have I gotten myself into?" Or maybe we're just projecting that on him.

The mystery buyer looking to purchase Kim Kardashian's sex tape needs to muster up at least $30 million if they want a CHANCE at taking it off the market ... TMZ has learned.

We spoke with Vivid Entertainment top banana Steve Hirsch ... who tells us he HAS made contact with the lawyer who's representing the mystery party interested in buying the rights to the sex tape ... and he's open to the possibility of a deal.

Hirsch tells us ... "Based on its long term value, it looks like $30 million would be a starting point for a discussion on all of the rights."

Hirsch adds, "I have no idea who is behind this offer ... but If it's Kim, I have a tremendous amount of respect for her. She has my number and can call me any time."

Someone is looking to buy the rights to the Kim Kardashian sex tape from Vivid Entertainment ... claiming they're willing to pay big bucks to "completely remove it from the market."

TMZ has learned the mystery buyer has hired a lawyer in Tennessee -- who fired off a letter to Vivid honcho Steve Hirsch yesterday which reads, "I was approached by a private party who has asked us about looking into the possibility of acquiring all rights of the Vivid, 'Kim Kardashian Sex Tape.'"

The lawyer adds, "The party we represent does not intend to distribute or broadcast the 'tape,' but hopes to completely remove it from the market."

The buyer also wants to purchase all of the raw, unused footage (sex tape outtakes) that never made it to the DVD.

The lawyer never identifies his client -- but leaves a giant hint ... writing, "We would purchase any other footage you may have control of that involves Ms. Kardashian."

The lawyer NEVER mentions the other person in the tape -- Ray J.

Sources close to Kim wouldn't tell us if the reality star is the mystery buyer ... but did reveal that Kim has previously shown interest in buying the rights to the tape.

With Hurricane Irene about to hit New York City, the Kardashians boarded up their SoHo store Dash just to be safe.

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries arrived at LAX from Italy yesterday, putting an end to their brief honeymoon.

Let the married life begin.

The Kris Jenner media train is plowing right through NBC and CBS -- Kim Kardashian's mom has just been tapped to guest co-host "The Today Show" AND "The Talk."

Jenner will reportedly fill-in for Sharon Osbourne on "The Talk" in September ... and with all the cuts producers have made on that show recently, it wouldn't be shocking if she got a permanent offer.

With their media spectacle wedding over, newlyweds Kim Kardashian and a shirtless Kris Humphries enjoyed their honeymoon by canoodling on top of each other at their hotel in Italy on Wednesday.

They are definitely taking in the sights.

While Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries were busy getting married ... TV producers were hard at work behind the scenes SCRIPTING a special moment between Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick ... and it was all caught on tape.

Listen to the walkie-talkie chatter between producers behind the scenes, choreographing the moment Scott and Kourtney decide to bring up the possibility of getting married themselves.

Sounds like K and S are going to go along with the plan to get hitched too ... because when production was wrapping on Kim's big day, one of the lead producers tells the crew, "See you at Kourtney's wedding."

Kris Humphries wasn't the only person who wanted to consummate his marriage to Kim Kardashian this weekend, 'cause at the same time ... MILLIONS of "fans" were flooding the official website for Kim's XXX tape.

TMZ has learned ... roughly 2 MILLION people visited KimKsuperstar.com between Friday and Sunday night ... a HUGE boost from the average weekend traffic.

In fact, the site only averages 300k unique visitors PER MONTH -- so it seems all the fanfare from the wedding led to some serious handfare across the planet.

And get this laddies -- according to Google Trends, America did NOT lead the pack in Internet searches for "Kim Kardashian Sex Tape" ... that honor went to Ireland.

Kim Kardashian's wedding bulldozed its way through Santa Barbara last weekend -- and one of its victims ... a wedding full of completely nice, innocent, non-Hollywood people.

As it turns out, the Biltmore Four Seasons Resort wasn't just hosting guests for the Kardashian-Humphries wedding -- it also put up the kind folks attending the nuptials for a gentleman named Matt Hornbuckle and his now-wife Christy Kirschenmann.

The Hornbuckle-Kirschenmann wedding rehearsal took place on Friday -- but when guests rolled up to the hotel bar afterwards for a round of cold ones, they were TURNED AWAY.

Inside sources tell TMZ, the bar had been shut down to make room for the media covering the Kardashian wedding nearby.