Schwarzenegger's Love Child Jacked Out in a Speedo ... Just Like Dad

Like father, like son -- Arnold Schwarzenegger's 16-year-old love child is already showing off his genetic superiority in a Speedo ... kicking ass at his high school swim meet this weekend.

Joseph Baena stripped down to his skivvies Sunday to represent his Bakersfield high school swim team -- swimming butterfly no less -- and his mom Mildred was right there on the deck cheering him on.

Joseph's been busy the last couple months -- as we reported, he just got his driver's license in January.

Arnold's Kid Joseph Baena I've Been Validated By the DMV

Arnold Schwarzenegger's son Joseph Baena is moppin' up the highway now ... because he just got his driver's license!

16-year old Joseph Baena and mom, Mildred, rolled up to the DMV in Bakersfield yesterday in the brand spankin' new Jeep Rubicon Arnold gave him for XMAS.

Joseph passed muster and drove out a full-fledged driver.

On the ride home ... mom rode shotgun.

Finally ... something to do in Bakersfield.

Arnold to Son Happy Birthday Let's Work It Out!

EXCLUSIVE

Arnold Schwarzenegger's son Joseph Baena is turning 16 today ... and he's getting the perfect gift from his dad -- A COMPLETE HOME GYM ... TMZ has learned.

In case you haven't noticed, Joseph is a behemoth -- a virtual carbon copy of a very young Austrian immigrant ... and Arnold clearly feels the apple may not fall far from the gigantic redwood tree.

Although Joseph lives with his mom in Bakersfield ... we've learned Arnold has established a very close relationship with the boy. They talk regularly on the phone and Arnold has flown him to several premieres.

As one source put it, "Once the truth came out, Arnold embraced Joseph. Since then, they've been slowly building a great relationship."

FYI -- Arnold started pumping iron around the time he was 16 and he quickly blew up to become Mr. Universe. So, current Mr. Bakersfield ... watch your back!

Arnold's Love Child I'M HUUUUGE!!!!

If there was any doubt Arnold Schwarzenegger shtuped his former maid .... DOUBT NO MORE ... 'cause his love child is about to turn 16 -- and he looks just like his humungous father.

Standing roughly 8'2" and weighing an estimated 475 lbs (pure muscle) ... genetic jackpot winner Joseph Baena strolled alongside his mother Mildred during a shopping excursion in Bakersfield, CA yesterday.

Joseph was sporting a shirt from a swimming and diving competition -- it's unclear if he participated, but we're guessing if he did, he dominated ... based purely on his enormous physique.

Fun Fact -- Arnold first began competitive bodybuilding around the age of 16 ... and eventually excelled in competitive adultery.

Happy birthday Joe!

Robert Kennedy, Jr. I'm Helping Maria Find Love!

Robert Kennedy, Jr. is on the hunt for someone to date his cousin, Maria Shriver.

We got Robert in Hollywood last night ... and he said Maria's on the hunt for a man -- especially since Arnold now has a GF.

The environmentalist advises potential suitors to write Ms. Shriver a letter.

Yeah, we're pretty sure he's being sarcastic. But it's pretty funny.

Arnold & Maria The Secret Butt Grab [VIDEO]

EXCLUSIVE

And now, definitive proof Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver are definitely maybe BACK TOGETHER -- Arnold totally grabbed Maria's butt last weekend ... and TMZ has video.

As we reported, Arnold and Maria were attending their daughter Christina's graduation at Georgetown ... and while people were milling around everywhere, Arnold casually cupped Maria's backside. It's subtle, but it happened.

FYI, Arnold has been obsessed with Maria's caboose since he met her in the '70s -- in fact, Arnold recently told a story on "60 Minutes" about how he told Maria's mother her daughter had a "great ass."

Maria & Arnold -- back together?

TMZ broke the story ... Arnold and Maria have been putting off their divorce and there are two lines of speculation -- 1) they're so rich divorce doesn't matter ... and 2) they secretly want to reconcile.

This video seems to suggest the latter ... but we still gotta ask ...

ARNOLD & MARIA It's NOT Over Yet

EXCLUSIVE

Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver are in no rush to get divorced ... and there are 2 lines of speculation -- either they're so rich it doesn't matter, or they may actually get back together.

Several sources connected to the former couple tell TMZ ... neither Arnold nor Maria feel any urgency to get a judge to make the divorce official, even though all of the money and custody issues have been worked out. The reason, they say, is simple ... They're worth approximately $400 million -- which they agree they'll split down the middle -- so it's not like they need the divorce to buy a house.

Short story -- neither one of them is in a hurry to pull the trigger, because it will have NO IMPACT on their day-to-day lives.

And other sources say there's a different reason why they haven't gotten divorced -- they are not done with each other, and there's still a chance they'll get back together. Our sources say both Arnold and Maria have sent mixed messages to their friends and family -- at times saying they want the divorce, and other times talking about how they still feel love for their longtime partner.

One source says ... lately Maria is more amenable to divorce because she's hearing that Arnold has a girlfriend.

FYI, Arnold and Maria were together last weekend at their daughter Christina's graduation ... looking pretty happy.

Stay tuned ...

Arnold & Maria Stomach Each Other ... for Easter Brunch

Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver reunited for an Easter brunch at a swanky hotel in Santa Monica yesterday ... but unlike Jesus, their marriage wasn't resurrected that day.

The former couple met up at Shutters On the Beach in their finest Easter outfits for what appeared to be a pretty civil get-together.

But sources close to the couple tell us ... despite the cordial front, Maria feels the relationship is irretrievably broken and the divorce is still full speed ahead.

You know ... because it's hard to take back your husband when he secretly knocks up your maid, hides the love child and then brags about his infidelities in a tell-all book.

Arnold's New Chick I Know My Way Around the Male Body

Arnold Schwarzenegger is in good hands ... 'cause his new chick is a very experienced, high-profile physical therapist ... TMZ has learned.

Her name is Heather ... and she made her first public appearance with Arnold during a romantic dinner date in Santa Monica over the weekend.

The next day, the two met up for a brunch ... and everybody knows there's no such thing as a platonic brunch.

Sources tell TMZ ... Heather is not your average physical therapist ... she's worked with a myriad of professional athletes including UFC badass Georges St-Pierre.

It's unclear if Heather is actually treating Arnold ... but one source close to the Governator tells us, "She is not in the normal group of people who treat him."

Plus, THEY BRUNCHED TOGETHER.

We smell romance ... and huevos rancheros.

Arnold Schwarzenegger The Hot Blonde Dinner Date

Looks like Arnold Schwarzenegger may have officially moved on from estranged wife Maria Shriver ... 'cause the former Governator was spotted having dinner with a hot mystery blonde in Santa Monica over the weekend.

Ahnold and the unidentified lady friend were all smiles as they dined alone at Babalu restaurant on trendy Montana Avenue.

Although Shriver filed for divorce in 2011, last month the former Governator told a German newspaper he was still in love with Maria and hoping to reconcile.

As we've been reporting, Arnold was trying to get Maria back for a long time, but our sources say months ago they both threw in the towel and all that's left is settling money stuff. So the whole, "I'm in love with her and I want her back" thing doesn't really ring true.

FYI -- Arnold had a date with another hot woman back in July and they were making out in the restaurant.

Case closed.

Arnold Schwarzenegger I Still Love Maria Trying to Save Our Marriage

Breaking News

Arnold Schwarzenegger is now going to the media in yet another attempt to save his marriage ... telling Germany's top newspaper he still loves Maria Shriver and wants to reconcile.

Ahnald spoke with the Bild newspaper -- and though we don't sprechen sie Deutsch ... we're told Schwarzenegger said, "We're not fighting any war. I still hope for reconciliation. I still love Maria."

Funny, since Arnold was spotted out partying with a 25-year-old chick over the summer ... and he doesn't love Maria enough to give her half of the autobiography profits even though Maria's relationship with Arnold is all over the book.

FYI -- Shriver filed for divorce back in 2011 after 25 years of marriage ... after it came out that Arnold fathered a secret love child with the family maid and never told her about it.

Arnold and Maria Battleground: Neiman Marcus

EXCLUSIVE

There's only room for one sheriff in Neiman Marcus ... at a time ... at least for Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver.

TMZ shoppers spotted Arnold -- with his weird new haircut -- roaming the racks at Neiman's in Bev Hills on Xmas Eve.

Arnold meandered from the overpriced jewelry ... to the extremely overpriced menswear ... to the restaurant area ... and then he left.

Roughly 15 minutes later, guess who appeared? Maria mosied through the department store for some last minute shopping. .

January will be an interesting month for the former couple. Not yet divorced, they are still squabbling over money. So the question -- who will pay the enormous credit card bill?

Stay tuned ...

Mildred Baena Reads Arnold's Book Why'd He Skip The Sex?

Looking to relive her adulterous glory days, Arnold Schwarzenegger's baby madre Mildred Baena has decided to read Arnie's tell-all book "Total Recall" ... but the problem is, Arnie didn't really tell all.

Mildred shamelessly brought the book out to a cafe in Bakersfield yesterday -- in full view of a photog who just happened to be there -- where she may have finally learned that the steamiest parts of her affair were CHOPPED from the final version.

Seriously ... when Arnold brings up Mildred in "Recall," he goes from "she worked in the house" right to "when she gave birth to the kid" ... completely blowing off the dirty details of the courtship.

Here's the exact passage:

"Mildred had been working in our household for 5 years and all of the sudden we were alone in the guest house.

When Mildred gave birth the following August, she named the baby Joseph."

Pretty big gap -- but Mildred can fill them in for herself.

The Kennedys Home Town Face Slap Arnold's Bio Sells Out

EXCLUSIVE

It's the unkindest cut of all for the Kennedy clan -- after Maria was betrayed by Arnold Schwarzenegger, the philanderer is cashing in big on the Kennedy's home turf.

We did some digging ... and found out the Hyannis Port residents care deeply about what Arnold has done behind Maria's back, because the book stores in town have completely sold out of "Total Recall."

In fact, residents were chomping at the bit to get the book, because most of the sales were pre-orders.

In case you didn't know, Hyannis Port is pretty much synonymous with the Kennedy family name. It's where JFK called home, and where Arnold told Maria's mom her daughter had a great ass.