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"Love & Hip Hop" star Erica Mena was brutally attacked at a nail salon -- so what could possibly instigate such a nuclear lady war? It's a clear case of BBT! Just watch.

Colombian singer Juanes is such a massive star around the world -- there aren't enough words in the English language to describe his success! Good thing we remember a poquito Spanish.

Erin Andrews and her L.A. Kings BF Jarret Stoll's answer to a simple Valentine's Day question sparked a hysterical convo -- about V-Day for gays and lesbians.

Warning: the following train of thought may derail. Frequently.

Pope Benedict XVI's retirement is a tremendous opportunity ... for degenerate gamblers to bet on who gets to cruise in the Popemobile next!

Yep, that is why they call it Sin City.

Kate Upton's breasts -- and their owner -- are on the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition for the second time ... proving good awesome things really do come in pairs.

Chris Brown had another Grammy weekend filled with drama -- but at least no one was arrested this time ... or beaten. Baby steps.

Not since Prince Harry have we seen a redhead cause the kind of chaos 'a Team' singer Ed Sheeran did -- and he didn't even have to lose his drawers playing strip billiards. True talent, this kid.

Jewel lived in her car before hitting it big as a singer, but does that really qualify as homeless? It's a super-compassionate question that -- for some reason -- Jewel was happy to answer.

Lindsay Lohan's super-plumped up lips gave us the perfect platform ... to bust some myths about why guys are attracted to women with big ones -- lips, that is. Prepare to cringe.

Tony Goldwyn has a hit show with "Scandal" ... and he's bona fide Hollywood royalty -- but all anyone wants to talk about is a little movie he did 23 years ago. Umm, "Ghost" ... or something like that?

"Honey Boo Boo" star Mama June has lost an incredible 100 pounds in the last two years -- in the absolute laziest way possible ... making her the best/worst example of fitness in America.

Bill Maher jokingly bet Donald Trump $5 million bucks to prove his father wasn't an orangutan -- but y'know what's even funnier? Getting sued for that $5 million!

Sometimes jokes hurt.

It's bad enough Rob Gronkowski could have screwed the Patriots by re-re-injuring his broken arm -- but the real travesty of his Vegas trip ... those insanely awful dance moves.

Lil' Kim paved the way for female rappers like Nicki Minaj, and she's not afraid to say it -- but it's hard to tell if that's really Kim doing the talking, because ... well, y'know.

Baltimore Ravens stars Joe Flacco and Ed Reed dominated on the field to win the Super Bowl -- but somehow they got upstaged by livestock! In Harvey's mind, anyway.

Colin Kaepernick has accomplished more in one season than Matt Leinart has in a 7-year NFL career -- which explains the less-than-warm welcome Matt got from two loud-mouthed fans.