Famous Food

Chief Keef is officially the richest person to ever go hungry -- after McDonalds refused to sell him some grub because he only had $100 bills.

Poor, poor rich people ... they have it so tough.

Busy week, with lots of alleged bigotry front and center -- from Alec Baldwin's Twitter rant, to Paula Deen's Titanic-like career plunge. So we gotta ask ...

Disgraced chef Paula Deen needs a job ... and she's a mom ... so the good people who run a MILF-based porn site put 2-and-2 together and have offered her a SIX-FIGURE GIG.

A website called PureMature.com fired off a letter this week ... offering Paula a place in their company ... in light of her N-word controversy, which has lost her MILLIONS in sponsorships.

In the letter, PM starts by explaining to Paula she's a MILF -- a hot mom over the age of 65 who men would like to (you know). It continues with the job offer adding, "Full figured or thin, arthritic or diabetic -- you embody our perfect spokesperson."

As for compensation, PureMature says it's willing to offer her "6 figures for very little work" ... and NO nudity is required. Phew.

You're rap protégé Chief Keef ... you're making buckets of money ... and all you want is some delicious McDonald's grub ... easy right? THINK AGAIN.

TMZ obtained hilarious video -- courtesy of hangwith.com -- of Chief and a buddy driving through a McD's this past week in Illinois ... after ordering almost $50 worth of food. Food you can ALMOST taste.

Problem is ... when Chief goes to pay he runs into a major -- and pretty rare -- monetary problem. It's definitely not what you think.

Unless you're thinking of making it rain with hundos. Then it's exactly what you think.

Keri Hilson is one of the lucky few humans who's tasted the latest, greatest food invention -- the cronut ... a croissant/doughnut hybrid that's turning New York City into a diabetes breeding ground.

The demolition derby known as Paula Deen's empire rolls on -- she's just been dropped by one of her publishers, which says it will no longer release her next project ... which was expected to be a best seller.

In a statement released Friday, Ballantine Books announced it has cancelled the publication of "Paula Deen's New Testament: 250 Favorite Recipes, All Lightened Up".

But get this ... even though the book wasn't set to come out until October, it's already #1 on Amazon with pre-order sales.

Ballantine adds its name to the long list of companies abandoning ship in light of Deen's n-word controversy ... The Food Network, QVC, JCPenny, and Smithfield Hams, etc ...

Paula Deen's officially the least popular kid on the playground ... JCPenney just severed ties with the celebrity chef in the wake of her n-word scandal.

A rep for the department store released a statement today, saying, "We can confirm that jcpenney has decided to discontinue selling Paula Deen branded merchandise."

JCP had sold Deen-brand kitchen products ... which is good news for Martha Stewart.

Paula Deen has filed legal docs in the lawsuit that sent her career into a free fall -- claiming the woman who's suing her is trumping up racial allegations and now Paula is out for blood.

Lisa Jackson -- who claims she was forced to quit her job as manager of Uncle Bubba's Seafood and Oyster House -- is asking for damages based on racial harassment, claiming she's African-American adjacent. As for Jackson's proof she's got African-American ties, she points to her partner's biracial niece, whom Jackson claims is half Black.

According to Paula's new legal docs -- obtained by TMZ -- Jackson's niece is NOT Black at all ... not even a little. Paula says Jackson's partner has now admitted the niece is Hispanic -- NOT Black.

And Paula's especially pissed that Jackson alleged in her lawsuit that Paula used the N-word in connection with Bubba's wedding, yet has never offered a shred of proof that the word was used.

Justin Bieber is a paranoid, self-absorbed megalomaniac ... is what you've gotta think after seeing the laughable rules he sets for photo shoots -- including a ban on speaking to the Bieber, and NEVER playing his ex ... Selena Gomez's music.

TMZ has obtained a rider from a Bieber photo shoot earlier this month, and other restrictions include NO cell phones and NO autographs whatsoever ... which are actually pretty common demands.

But Bieber also has a laundry list of food demands on set -- including herbal teas, a deli platter, a veggie platter, a large pack of Swedish Fish, Ritz Bits Peanut Butter Sandwiches, Ritz Bitz Cheese Sandwiches, and 2 large packs of Haribo cola gummies.

Munchies much?

Bieber also must have a serious sweating problem -- because he asks for several packs of white undershirts, tanks and socks as well. Weird.

Then of course, there's the required boombox with an iPhone 5 connector ... for tunes.

Paula Deen can't apologize enough to stop the bleeding -- Kmart and Sears are now cutting ties with her in the wake of the n-word controversy ... TMZ has learned.

Sears Holdings -- owner of Sears and Kmart stores -- tells us, "After careful consideration of all available information, we have made the decision to phase out all products tied to [Paula Deen's] brand."

But the retail giants -- which carry Deen's cookware and dishware lines -- seem to be guilty of a little fence-sitting, because they added ... "We will continue to evaluate the situation."

Yesterday Home Depot, Target, and QVC also jumped ship ... following the Food Network's lead.

What's that saying about a pound of flesh?

After waiting around to see which way the wind blew ... QVC -- like a lemming -- followed the rest of Paula Deen's partners and dropped the chef in the wake of the n-word scandal.

Initially, QVC refused to take a stand -- saying they were closely monitoring the situation.

Now, after just about every company connected to Deen jumped ship ... QVC has sheepishly made its move ... announcing Paula will not appear on any upcoming broadcasts ... for now.

In fact, the head of QVC released a statement saying, "Some of you may wonder whether this is a 'forever' decision – whether we are simply ending our association with Paula. We don’t think that’s how relationships work. People deserve second chances. And we always strive to do the right thing." One question: Huh?

For her part, Paula released her own statement regarding the QVC split, saying, "As you know, I have some important things to work on right now, both personally and professionally. And so we’ve agreed that it’s best for me to step back from QVC and focus on setting things right."

Who's next?

Paula Deen's in the crosshairs at Target -- with the retail chain telling TMZ they will NOT continue to do business with the chef in the wake of her N-word scandal.

FYI -- Target offers a variety of Paula Deen cookware ... including pots, pans and skillets.

A rep for Target tells TMZ ... "We have made a decision to phase out the Paula Deen merchandise in our stores as well as on Target.com. Once the merchandise is sold out, we will not be replenishing inventory."

Meanwhile, Puma has yet to drop Aaron Hernandez. Just sayin ...

Paula Deen's situation is so bad ... even diabetes is distancing itself from the crazy cook.

TMZ has learned ... Paula and diabetes drug maker Novo Nordisk have parted ways ... at least for now. Deen -- who has Type 2 diabetes -- was a spokesperson for the company's campaign, "Diabetes in a New Light." Paula was singing the virtue of Novo Nordisk's diabetes drug Victoza, which she takes ... she also ironically was promoting "lifestyle changes."

A Novo Nordisk spokesperson tells TMZ ... they have mutually agreed with Paula to part ways for now, "while she takes time to focus her attention where it is needed."

In their never-ending pursuit of manliness, the guys from One Direction spent Tuesday night on the prowl for tattoos and fried chicken ... and lucky for them, they hit the bloody jackpot in Maryland.

TMZ has learned ... the guys were passing through Glen Burnie, MD this week when they had a sudden urge for some new body art -- so they sent their bodyguard to scope out some of the local needle joints.

We're told the bodyguard liked what he saw when he walked into Tattooed Heart Studios ... and 20 minutes later, in came Liam, Zayn and Louis.

Zayn and Louis each came prepared with some designs in mind -- Zayn wanted an image his of GF's face ... and Louis wanted doodles on his forearm of a spiderweb ('cause he likes Spider-Man) and a bomb ('cause he's da bomb?).

During the session, we're told the guys had a craving for some fried chicken -- so they sent their bodyguard to a nearby KFC, where he picked up a bucket of finger lickin' deliciousness.

Another one bites the dust ... Paula Deen has just been dropped by Walmart.

The retail giant just released a statement, saying, "We are ending our relationship with Paula Deen Enterprises and we will not place new orders beyond those already committed."

Walmart is Paula's latest business partner to sever ties with the celebrity chef in the wake of her n-word scandal ... a list that includes the Food Network, the Caesars casino company, and the ham company Smithfield.

Deen appeared on "Today" this morning, offering a tearful apology -- saying, "If there's anyone out there that has never said something that they wish they could take back ... please pick up that stone and throw it so hard at my head that it kills me."

Et tu, Caesars?

The casino company just announced it will be KILLING its professional relationship with Paula Deen -- and will close all 4 of her restaurants that operate on its properties.

FYI -- Deen has restaurants in Harrah's Tunica near Memphis, Harrah's Joliet near Chicago, Harrah's Cherokee in North Carolina ... and a buffet at Horseshoe Southern Indiana.

But fear not hungry gamblers, Caesars says it intends to rebrand Paula's restaurants and reopen them in a couple of months.

Caesars says the move is in the company's "best interest" following the whole N-word scandal.