Hot Mamas

Tanning Mom looks like she's 102-year-old bacon, but thinks she's a hip-hop fan in her 20s -- 'cause she was bumping Jay-Z loud enough to shatter the windows ... on her MINI-VAN!!

Tanning Mom -- aka Patricia Krentcil, aka Crypt Keeper, aka Burnt Beef Jerky -- was sitting in her driveway this weekend in Nutley, NJ blasting the only Jigga song you'd expect her to play ... "Young Forever."

While TM was chillin' to Jay ... she clearly got a little pissed off waiting for her husband.

Eventually, she stormed out of the car and back into the house ... showing off her severely over-tanned legs in a severely revealing outfit.

"Teen Mom" star Jenelle Evans took time out from getting arrested to show off her new pride and joy ... her brand new boobs.

After going under the knife just last week, the 20-year-old flaunted her new buxom figure in a well endowed pink bikini on the beach in North Carolina this weekend.

While her mother is taking care of her son Jace, let's hope Jenelle can retain custody of her new girls.

OctoMom's first day as a self-serving porn star is in the can ... so to speak.

TMZ has learned ... Nadya Suleman completed her first day of XXX shooting at a porn mansion in the San Fernando Valley on Thursday ... and we're told things couldn't have gone better!!!

We're told Octo appeared nervous when she arrived to the home ... but after chatting with some other porn stars who were at the house, she seemed to calm down.

Before the shoot, producers decided it would be a good idea to screen some porno flicks for Octo as an educational tool ... so to speak.

But when it was time for Octo to get down to business ... with herself ... one source on the set tells us "She was a natural ... she looked great!!"

As the latest pregnant famous person to do their best Demi Moore Vanity Fair cover impersonation, topless former Tiger Woods mistress Rachel Uchitel showed off her growing baby bump -- and nearly everything else -- in a sexy maternity g-string.

This is baby's first thong.

The 37-year-old -- who is due in eight days -- then went a little more demure by also posing covered up in a sheet.

On the heels of Jessica Simpson finally giving birth yesterday ... "How I Met Your Mother" star Alyson Hannigan proved she's ready to become the new Hollywood Queen of the Baby Bump during a stroll in L.A. on Tuesday.

The 38-year-old -- who is due in June -- has some enormous maternity shoes to fill.

The Jessica Simpson baby countdown is finally over -- because she just gave birth to a bouncing baby girl ... who weighed 9 pounds 13 ounces and measured in at 21.75 inches!!!

The kid's name is Maxwell Drew Johnson -- which is pretty normal by celebrity baby naming standards.

Jessica and her fiance Eric Johnson decided to use the name Drew because it's Jessica's mother's maiden name.

Jess just released a statement on her website ... saying, "Eric and I are elated to announce the birth of our baby girl Maxwell Drew Johnson."

"We are so grateful for all of the love, support and prayers we have received. This has been the greatest experience of our lives."

Angelina Jolie pulled a very special "Jolie" earlier today -- showing some leg on Hollywood Blvd ... while brandishing her fat new engagement ring.

The 36-year-old actress is serious wife material.

Just three months after giving birth to little Blue Ivy, Beyonce showed off her curvy maternal physique in a chic one piece black Norma Kamali swimsuit while taking a dip in the Caribbean on Monday.

The 30-year-old is one hot mama.

"Mirror Mirror" star Julia Roberts proved she's still the fairest of them all by showing off her smokin' 44-year-old mother-of-three body this weekend in a hot black Tory Burch bikini.

With her classy lower back tat peeking over her bikini bottoms, the former "My Best Friend's Wedding" actress frolicked around the beach in Hawaii with her 3 kids -- Hazel, Phinnaeus and Henry -- and her RIPPED husband Danny Moder.

It was belly bump vs. booty bump, as bikini-clad Kim and Kourtney Kardashian let all their loveliness hang out while vacationing in the Dominican Republic this weekend.

While pregnant Kourtney flashed her bulging stomach, Kim made sure her posterior pride and joy enjoyed its moment in the sun too.

Decked out in an Amish man's hat, a librarian's cardigan, a red satin nightgown and a pair of open-toed brown hoof heels, Suri Cruise's mother Katie Holmes looked like she was late for class holding a binder and two thermoses in Manhattan on Tuesday.

Octomom says she's downright PROUD of her new topless photo shoot ... claiming she has absolutely nothing to be ashamed of ... except her financial situation.

Nadya Suleman just called in to "TMZ Live" ... and said she made the decision to go half-naked because the shoot was for a women's magazine ... not a men's magazine ... and she didn't think the spread would be "hyper-sexualized."

While she admits the move was done out of desperation ... because she's completely strapped for cash ... Octo says, "I'm not ashamed of doing it ... I feel as though no woman or man should be ashamed of their body."

Here she is ... a topless OctoMom in all her nipple-covering glory ... smiling her way through a series of erotic photos for a European magazine.

The photos feature Nadya Suleman in various states of undress ... eventually stripping down to just a pair of panties. For the record -- the panties never come off (thank god).

Octomom is so desperate for money, she did what she swore she would never do -- pose nude for cash.

Nadya Suleman is days away from being homeless ... the house she owns that has been in and out of foreclosure for more than a year will be sold at an auction Thursday ... so Octo needs a new crib for her brood ... stat.

The dilemma -- getting first and last month's rent together, so Octo has gone naked. She posed for the European magazine, "Closer."

Sources tell TMZ ... Octo got $10,000 for the shoot, which is what she needs to rent a new place.

Octo is being very up front now about some misgivings about having 14 kids, saying, "I'm doing that (posing nude) because I need to feed my kids. I need to pay the bills. And I'm still very cognizant of the repercussions of my choices."

It's not the first time Octo has been offered cash for skin ... porn giant Vivid Entertainment offered Suleman a $1,000,000 contract back in 2009 ... which she rejected.

Victoria's Secret angel Doutzen Kroes showed off her maternal instincts today in Miami -- slipping into a tiny pink bikini ... and chasing her 1-year-old around the beach.