The Return of Marky Mark? Only for Half a Trillion!

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They say everybody has their price -- but the only way Mark Wahlberg is gonna whore himself out as Marky Mark again is if he gets a $500 billion payday. Funky Bunch sold separately.

'Ferris Bueller' Star I Can't Afford My Old House!

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There's a reason Cameron Frye will never return to the house where he and Ferris Bueller ruined his dad's precious Ferrari back in the day -- it's too damn expensive!

Alan Ruck, 52, who looks virtually the same as he did in "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" way back in '86, was at LAX yesterday, where he said there's no way he could meet the home's $2.3 million price tag.

What happened to all that "Spin City" cash!?

Billy Joel: Drumming Up Legal Trouble

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Billy Joel is being sued, and for a reason that doesn't include smashing his car into something.

Liberty DeVitto, Joel's former drummer, is laying a beat down on the singer's wallet. DeVitto tells the NY Post he hasn't been paid his proper royalties for over ten years. Shouldn't DeVitto have brought this up a little sooner? Like every two weeks, when normal people get their paychecks?

Devitto was kicked out of the band in 2005--the same year Joel entered rehab.

The ousted drummer tells the paper if Joel would have talked to him "this probably never would have happened."

Vida Guerra Butt You Didn't Pay Me!

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Actress/model Vida Guerra -- known for having one of the hottest backsides in Hollywood -- is suing a company called Ripe Digital Entertainment over an online hosting gig she claims she was never paid for.

According to a lawsuit filed Friday, Guerra says she was supposed to be paid $13,200 for hosting an online segment called "Vida's Video Picks." Guerra also claims in the lawsuit that after the two sides initially reached an impasse, she paid for a mediation service to handle arbitration -- but Ripe bailed.

Guerra is suing for her lost wages -- plus an additional $396,000 in damages, plus attorney's fees.

Seth MacFarlane Come Fly With Me

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"Family Guy" creator Seth MacFarlane just did exactly what you'd expect the highest paid writer-producer in television to do -- he bought his own plane.

Seth reportedly pulled in a cool $100 million last year on a four-year contract. Consider the 13-seater a present to himself.

Snoop Dogg Cleared in Beatdown Case

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Snoop Dogg won't have to ante up in the lawsuit where he was accused of assaulting and battering a dude after a Seattle concert back in 2005.

A jury decided Mr. Dogg doesn't owe Richard Monroe Jr. anything for the alleged attack. But some no-name performer, along with Doggy Style Music and others, will have to pay $449,000 for Monroe's injuries.

Story developing ...

Ben & Jen Blue Ribbon Home

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Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner have just purchased a mansion that was formerly owned by Gregory Peck -- thereby placing the couple the closest they will ever get to an acting Oscar.

The 8,000 square foot ranch house in the Pacific Palisades was sold to the couple for a whopping $17.5 million by mega-producer Brian Grazer, according to Hot Property. The five bedroom house features a gym, swimming pool and eight bathrooms -- and Gregory Peck once shot an ad for Pabst Blue Ribbon beer in the den.

The house was originally listed for $27.5 mil. Times are tough people, sometimes $17.5 mil is all a man can get.

Vanessa Hudgens Settles for More than Zac

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Vanessa Hudgens has settled a lawsuit with the former producer who claims she stiffed him.

Johnny Vieira sued Vanessa, claiming she refused to honor a deal they inked before she made it big.

Hudgens' lawyer tells TMZ, "My client appreciates Mr. Vieira's efforts early in her recording career. We're glad to be able to resolve the issues in a mutually agreeable fashion."

Translation -- settled for an undisclosed sum.

Toni Braxton: My Insurance Co. Has No Heart

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Toni Braxton has been left holding the bag after canceling her 2006 concert in Las Vegas due to heart problems -- and she says Lloyd's of London screwed her.

Braxton has filed suit, claiming she bought "non-appearance" and "cancellation" insurance, which protects entertainers in case their concerts have to be cancelled.

Braxton says Lloyd's refuses to pay for the losses at her Flamingo Hotel concert that never happened, on grounds it was an undisclosed, pre-existing condition. Braxton begs to differ.

She's suing for undisclosed damages.

Mark Sanchez First Class Rookie

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The New York Jets dropped some serious jack on QB Mark Sanchez hours after picking him fifth in this weekend's NFL draft.

TMZ has learned the Jets spent $13,488 to fly Mark and five other family members first class -- LA to NY Saturday night. Gang Green also picked up the tab for a business class seat and two coach tickets (Mark's nephew and sis-in-law drew the short straws).

Sounds like the Jets are going all out to match the pampering Sanchez got as BMOC at USC.

Snoop Dogg: Lien on Me

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Snoop Dogg may be the biggest rapper of all time -- you would think that means he's making the most money. So why, Mr. Snoop, are you in the hole to the state of California?

We've obtained a tax lien -- filed last month -- showing The Dogg owes the State $284,053.59.

By our calculations, that's about 190,000 joints.

Prince Accused of Royally Screwing Book People

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The artist known as Prince will also be known as defendant -- accused of some seriously cutthroat business tactics in a book deal gone sour.

According to a lawsuit filed yesterday in L.A. County Superior Court, a literary agency claims Prince chose them as his "exclusive agent with respect to the negotiations of a publishing deal" for a book called "21 Nights" and a special limited edition version.

In the documents, the agency claims in the final stages of the deal, Prince stopped calling them back -- and then went behind their back to finish the negotiations -- thus screwing the company out of it's 15% commission.

The agency is now suing for it's 15% -- about $200,000. Practically chump change for the Purple One.

Socialite Gloria Vanderbilt 'Memba Her?!

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Gloria Vanderbilt is best known for being an heiress to the prominent Vanderbilt family of New York and for her line of designer jeans in the '80s. Guess what she looks like now!

Shifty Rose Lady Dupes Snoop Out of $100

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Snoop Dogg was droppin' dollars like it's hot last night -- and shelled out 125 bucks for ONE ROSE!

The super-generous Doggfather gave one flower lady a Benjamin outside Area nightclub, granted she split the bill with the two other rose slangers. Slight problem: Chick bolted with the money while the others still wanted their share!

Nanny to De Niro: Pay Up, Focker!

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Robert De Niro's former nanny is raging pissed -- claiming the actor stiffed her out of $40k in overtime pay and then fired her.

The nanny claims she racked up 750 hours of O.T. in just ten months of work for Robert and his wife back in 2006, and when she threatened to quit -- De Niro pulled the trigger first.

Now the nanny has filed a lawsuit in Manhattan's state Supreme Court, in which she also claims she never got her 10 days of vacation.

No comment from De Niro's people yet.

Karina: Shawn Johnson Makes How Much?

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Karina Smirnoff from "Dancing With The Stars" was headed to practice when we asked her if she knew how much bank Shawn Johnson was getting paid for doing the show.

Unfortunately for Karina, we had to be the ones to inform her that she makes chump change compared to her 17-year-old competitor.