Billy Joel HATES "We Didn't Start the Fire" ... at least he sure made it seem that way during a concert in Toronto, when he screwed up the lyrics and then RIPPED the song apart.
The Piano Man was performing at the Air Canada Centre on March 9 when he tripped up over the lyrics right around the time he was supposed to sing about Rosenberg's H-Bomb.
That's when he stopped the band dead in their tracks ... and went off -- saying, "All you gotta do is f**k up one word in that song and it's a train wreck."
On the video, unearthed by RollingStone.com, Joel continued to gripe, "It's the same thing verse after verse ... Just the words change. It's one of the worst melodies I ever wrote."
JFK ain't the only one blown away ...
During SXSW Show
3/14/2014 6:17 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Lady Gaga's antics are sometimes vomit inducing, but this is ridiculous ... last night at her SXSW show, she actually let some chick VOMIT ALL OVER HER while she performed.
The vomiter is no amateur ... she's actually a "vomit painter" (actual profession) named Millie Brown, who is known for drinking various liquids and then vomiting them up onto a canvas. In this case ... the canvas was Lady Gaga.
Gaga was playing drums on a song called "Swine" when Brown, after drinking neon green liquid, proceeded to stand over her, stick her fingers down her throat, and vomit the green liquid all over Gaga.
Watch the performance for yourself ... it's sick. Literally.
Chimp Expert Jane Goodall
Bubbles Was Beaten
On MJ's Watch
3/14/2014 4:30 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
The world's leading chimp expert says Michael Jackson's famous pet monkey Bubbles was brutalized at Neverland and she blames MJ.
Jane Goodall dropped the bombshell leaving an event in Washington, D.C. ... saying Bubbles was BEATEN while in Michael's care. She doesn't say who beat Bubbles, but she does say she confronted MJ and it "ticked him off."
Our photog was clearly caught off guard and didn't ask the circumstances surrounding the alleged beating. La Toya's ex-husband, Jack Gordon, claimed the singer did indeed abuse Bubbles, saying, "I saw Michael punch Bubbles, kick him in the stomach. Michael used to say, 'He doesn't feel it. He's a chimpanzee. I have to discipline him.'"
Various people in the MJ camp denied the claims, and there are stories that Bubbles was actually treated like a hairy king, eating at the dining room table with MJ and having free access to the fridge for Haagen-Dazs fixes.
FYI -- Bubbles -- now 30 -- is alive and well ... living in a Florida animal sanctuary.
Master P Divorce
My Husband's Filthy Rich
And I Need Welfare
3/14/2014 4:00 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Master P's estranged wife claims he's worth $200 MILLION ... yet she says he's left her and their 4 minor kids so destitute ... she needs welfare.
Sonya Miller says she's indignant ... because she helped Master P create one of the most successful labels in hip-hop -- No Limit Records -- yet he has cut her off like a bad habit.
Sonya says things have become so desperate ... she had to move in with her adult son, Lil Romeo.
Master P hasn't even responded to her divorce petition. The judge fined him $10K for ignoring the case, but he doesn't seem to care.
Sonya explains in her docs she hooked up with Master P when he didn't have a pot to pee in ... back in '89. They started the label together, and when it exploded, they built an empire, which include clothing manufacturing, sports management, toy manufacturing, and film and TV production.
Oh yeah, they also created an adult erotic phone chatline.
She may be working the phone line if Master P doesn't ante up.
'DWTS' Has Stripped Me Of My Privacy
3/14/2014 3:30 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Cody Simpson has lost his right of privacy while doing "Dancing With the Stars." He cannot remove his mic while he's on the phone, while he's talking business, while he reveals his most inner thoughts. The only exception -- taking a dump.
The contract Cody signed makes the NSA look like child's play. We got a copy because Cody's only 17 and the doc has to be filed with the court.
Cody agrees to wear a mic during rehearsal's and training, with only a bathroom break out.
The Australian singer gets a guaranteed $125K ... which goes up the longer he stays on the show. It caps out at $50K per week if he's in the finals.
And, "DWTS" cleverly figured out a way to block Jimmy Fallon from hijacking ABC stars. Cody specifically agreed to appear on "Jimmy Kimmel Live," "Good Morning America," and "The View."
Here's how onerous the deal is ... "DWTS" has final cut on Cody's hairstyle.
4 Baby Mamas
Pop Out Reality Show
3/14/2014 3:00 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Lil Boosie's 4 baby mamas have another bun in the oven -- a reality show.
Sources close to the production tell TMZ, Boosie's babes -- Walnita, Tracey, Trivia, and Gerlissa -- have been putting together a pilot episode over the last few months while the rapper's been locked behind bars. Together, they've mothered Boosie's 7 children (aged 4-11).
FYI, Walnita's the baby mama who was arrested back in 2010 for trying to smuggle Boosie drugs in jail.
We're told the reality show will focus on the ladies' unusual friendships that formed as the result of their ... peculiar circumstances. It's unclear if Boosie -- née Torrence Hatch -- will also be participating now that he's free.
According to sources, the producers behind the show are currently shopping it to several networks -- including Oxygen, WE, and Fuse -- but so far, no deal is in place.
Kimberly Hart in
3/14/2014 2:30 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Amy Jo Johnson is best known for playing the karate kicking Pink Ranger Kimberly Hart in the early '90s television show "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers." Guess what she looks like now!
Rihanna & Drake
Hardcore Proof They're 100% ...
Holding Hands (and Probably Banging)
3/14/2014 12:02 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Michael Lohan's GF
Busted for DUI
After Allegedly Smacking Him Around
3/13/2014 6:15 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Call it the rematch ... Michael Lohan and Kate Major had another blowout fight tonight -- but this one ended with her in handcuffs for DUI ... TMZ has learned.
Michael claims they were in a nasty argument at their home in FL when she hit him multiple times in the face.
We're told Lohan called 911, and just as cops arrived ... Kate was fleeing in her car.
She didn't get far -- according to law enforcement, Kate crashed into some bushes near the house ... and was busted for allegedly driving intoxicated.
We're told she's still in custody, and getting booked for DUI ... and possibly domestic battery.
Less than a month ago Kate locked herself in a bedroom, and claimed Michael was trying to break down the door while brandishing a knife.
Police responded to calm the sitch, but no one was arrested ... that time.
So My BF's Dad Is a Dictator ...
At Least I Got a New Rolls!
3/13/2014 5:45 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
I Had a Chef in Prison
Best Microwave Cook Ever
3/13/2014 4:23 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Petey Pablo had a personal chef while he was locked up for his firearms conviction ... but picture less Wolfgang Puck, and more Miss Claudette.
Pablo tells TMZ ... he paid another inmate to cook his meals -- dishes like chicken, pizza, and rice and beans. Wolf ranges are not available in the big house, but microwaves were readily available.
The "chef" would buy ingredients from the prison commissary and whip up the meals. Pablo's favorite -- a spicy rice bowl with jalapenos and available meat. Pablo boasts, "It was some of the best food you could ever make in a microwave."
The rapper says he learned a hard lesson behind bars ... and vows to never carry a gun again.
Lawyer Fires Back
I Wasn't Promoting Me, I Was Promoting You!
3/13/2014 2:15 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
The personal injury lawyer who just got his ass sued by Judge Judy insists Judy's got her robe in a bunch for no reason -- telling TMZ, he wasn't using her image to promote himself ... he was using it to promote HER.
As we reported, Judy sued attorney John Haymond claiming he stole clips from her show to use in a commercial to promote his law firm -- but Haymond says that's just not the case.
He tells us, the commercial in question is actually for her OWN SHOW.
According to Haymond, the local ABC affiliate in New Haven, CT and NBC affiliate in Springfield recently asked Haymond -- a well-known personal injury lawyer in the area -- and his daughters to appear in the Judge Judy promo ... and he obliged.
Haymond says the promotions actually ran on the station several years ago, but recently stopped, and he's surprised the station isn't owning up. According to Haymond, "If the local affiliates would just release these Judge Judy Show promotions, everyone would see this is much ado about nothing."
What Haymond isn't addressing -- apparently Judy doesn't think he has the right to take old commercials targeted for her show and then slap them on his website long after the fact.