Famous Food

Type 2 diabetic Paula Deen is unfazed by her life-threatening disease -- practically unhinging her jaw this week on a Caribbean cruise ... to take a heart-stopping bite out of a cheeseburger.

The picture was snapped Monday on board a Celebrity cruise ship -- where the 65-year-old is currently tempting fate, hosting her annual "Party-at-Sea" vacation for 400 devoted followers. It's hard to see, but there are also fries on her plate.

The cruise left Miami on Saturday -- and it's set to visit Puerto Rico, St. Thomas, and St. Maarten on the 7-day calorie-filled round trip.

So far, it's unclear if they serve salads.

Anthony Bourdain is putting Paula Deen ON BLAST -- mocking the butter-loving chef for poisoning Americans with unhealthy food ... and now trying to profit off of their illness.

In an ultra-transparent Twitter attack -- Bourdain wrote, "Thinking of getting into the leg-breaking business, so I can profitably sell crutches later."

The "Kitchen Confidential" author is presumably pissed that Deen -- who built an empire off her high-fat, high-sugar recipes -- announced she has diabetes ... and subsequently revealed she's become a paid spokeswoman for a diabetes medication.

There are reports ... Deen knew about her diabetes for years -- but continued to hock her recipes on her Food Network cooking show, while secretly negotiating the endorsement deal.

Obviously, Bourdain sees a serious conflict of interest in Deen's behavior.

Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom are getting a hero's welcome in Dallas this month -- thanks to Lamar's new teammate Shawn Marion, who's throwing a blowout welcome dinner at his insane mansion ... including fried lobster, absinthe cocktails, and Kobe beef.

TMZ has obtained the invitation to the dinner -- scheduled for January 26th at Marion's 12,600 square foot Dallas palace ... to welcome Lamar, Delonte West, and Vince Carter to the Mavericks.

According to sources, the entire Mavericks team will be present ... along with some other select VIPs -- and the entire affair will be catered by a chef from a local fancy steakhouse.

We're told the menu is inspired by Khloe and Lamar -- and will include items from the couple's wedding menu ... like Wagyu beef sliders and champagne with floating Gardenia petals.

Amber Portwood's second-to-last meal of 2011 won't be leaving her with fond memories ... but at least there will be KOOL-AID!!!

The "Teen Mom" star is currently behind bars at Madison County Jail in Indiana, awaiting her late January court date on possible probation violations.

According to our sources, Portwood's lunch today will consist of a turkey sandwich on white bread with American cheese, fruit cocktail, and Kool-Aid to drink.

Portwood's Xmas dinner wasn't much better -- she dined on turkey sausage pizza, a side of carrots (cold, not steamed), peas and some pineapple.

Amber Portwood is firmly entrenched on Santa's naughty list -- not only will she be spending the holidays behind bars, but her Xmas Eve meal sounds worse than eating a lump of coal.

Amber was tossed in the slammer earlier this week and will remain there until a court date in January.

According to the folks at the Madison County Jail in Indiana, inmates will be dining this evening on turkey sausage pizza (which was described to us as "a meat-like substance on top of the pizza"), a side of carrots (cold, not steamed), peas and some pineapple.

Amber will not be having dessert.

The Cheerios honeybee got the XXX treatment on the front page of an official Cheerios website this morning -- thanks to some mischievous vandal -- and now, General Mills is scrambling to clean up the mess.

It's supposed to be a website for kids to make their own Cheerios-themed comics -- but clearly, someone got carried away ... and the explicit cartoon made it to the top of the popular "Honey Defender" website.

A rep for the cereal company tells TMZ, “We have some safeguards that are supposed to keep this from happening, but I guess it wasn’t set up with this game."

The rep adds, "Normally, our games where we allow viewers to spell out things themselves have safeguards that tell children they can’t type stuff like that in. Let’s just say this is no longer going to be the 'Hot Comic of the Week' much longer!”

After signing a massive $250 million contract , Albert Pujols will be joining the Los Angeles Angels next season -- and a local sports bar is commemorating his arrival with an equally massive burger.

The OC Sports Grill, located a stone's throw away from Angels Stadium, is introducing the new Machine Burger ... to celebrate his signing. Here's the lineup for the burger, which has a Dominican flair in Albert's honor:

1/4 lb. chimichurri seasoned burger, queso frito, pulled pork & cabbage tossed in “savon” sauce, tomatoes, avocado, and crispy onion straws.

Lady Gaga can pour Cheerios all over her wet, naked body as long as she wants -- the cereal company tells TMZ, the singer's controversial new music video is all just freedom of expression.

If you haven't seen Gaga's new video for "Marry the Night," you're missing out on 14 minutes of naked, avant-garde weirdness ... including a scene where she empties a box of cheerios on her naked body.

A rep for Cheerios tells us, the cereal company had nothing to do with the video -- but it also has no plans to pursue legal action.

The rep tells us, "We feel that people express their passion in a lot of different ways ... This was certainly a first!"

Probably the point, no?

Still looking for that elusive follow-up hit to the ‘90s smash single “MMMBop” -- former boy band Hanson is now turning to booze … in the form of a new beer they’re calling “MMMHop” … this according to drummer Zac.

According to reports, Zac made the announcement during an event at Oxford University this week … telling the crowd, “We are soon going to be selling our own beer … I’m not joking – MMMhop IPA anyone?”

Through a rep, Zac tells TMZ, "Yes a branded HANSON IPA beer concept is in the works under the moniker 'MmmHops.' We're glad to see a bit of buzz around the idea, which has been brewing for some time."

In the meantime, it's been 14 years since MMMBop came out -- feel old yet?

He's barely been locked up a couple hours -- but TMZ has learned, Dr. Conrad Murray has already been offered a delicious sacked lunch behind bars ... including jailhouse-baked cookies.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ, Murray's first meal contained a cheese sandwich, some fruit punch, a few carrot sticks, and some homemade Oreo-knockoff cookies ... baked in the jail's own bakery.

A year before releasing the book that launched him to infamy -- "Kitchen Confidential" -- chef, author, and professional ramblin' man Anthony Bourdain let it all hang out while on vacation on St. Martin ... and TMZ has obtained the ballsy photos.

We spoke with Anthony ... who told us the pics were snapped by his now ex-wife Nancy in 1999 -- capturing Bourdain and his best bud/sous chef Steven Tempel in their element.

Anthony tells us, "I look good! Nice tan. As I haven't seen the photos without the star, I can only hope the water wasn't too cold that day."

DMX sentenced himself to hard labor yesterday, relieving a lowly Waffle House employee from mop duty ... and performing the filthy chore himself!

The photos were snapped at a WH in Greenville, South Carolina -- where the rapper stopped in for some late night eats ... after a Halloween party at a nearby strip club.

The rapper tells us, one of the workers -- who was mopping the floors at the time -- said he was a big fan ... and X was so touched, he grabbed the mop and finished the guy's job for him.

The Dog tells us, "I was in a good mood and felt that I would do that for him since it was 4am and [the employee] had been working all night."

The rapper adds, "The minute you get too big to mop a floor or wipe a counter, that’s the exact minute you have life f**ked up."

Herman Cain is making a solemn vow ... to bring Godfather's Pizza to the White House if he becomes president -- not like a few pizzas, but he will build an actual pizza kitchen!!!

Victor Ortiz -- the guy who Floyd Mayweather sucker punched in a championship bout last month -- already has plans for a massive comeback ... in the gut-busting world of Mexican food.

Victor tells TMZ, he's planning to invest a portion of his $2 million fight earnings in a chain of taco restaurants in L.A. -- and he hit the streets yesterday to scope out some possible locations.

Steven Tyler was suffering from dehydration caused by a bout of food poisoning when he collapsed in a Paraguay hotel shower today ... sources connected to Tyler tell TMZ.

Tyler was reportedly treated for injuries to his face ... including loss of teeth ... after the accident occurred.

TMZ spoke with the singer's manager ... who described Tyler's injuries as "minor" and said Steven has already been released from the hospital.

President Barack Obama winged it hardcore yesterday -- hitting up L.A.'s famous Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles ... in a move that made his wife and kids extremely jealous.

TMZ spoke with a manager at the Pico location, who tells us, Obama dropped by to pick up an early dinner with his secret service -- ordering the "Country Boy" combo ... 3 chicken wings, a waffle, and potato salad ... for a fiscally responsible $8.40.

The manager tells us, he was honored to have the Commander-in-Chief at his establishment -- but says he won't be renaming any menu items after B.O. ... in fairness to Reagan and Nixon, who were also regulars ... but don't have any items named after them.

Michelle and kids weren't there -- but according to the manager, Barack insisted his wife and daughters would be stopping by Roscoe's Hollywood location in the near future ... because they're also huge fans of the restaurant.