Hot Bodies

Audrina Patridge is like a way hotter version of the groundhog ... who just poked her barely covered butt up out of the sand -- and good news!

It's officially bikini season. AP's ass said so.

How 'bout them Cowgirls???

The Dallas Cowboys cheerleading squad ran for the border this week ... hittin' up Cancun for a smokin' hot bikini calendar shoot ... and TMZ Sports has the pics.

They swam ... they frolicked in the sand ... they went on a boat -- and they documented every moment.

Madonna's not ACTUALLY a slutty attention whore who planned to expose her nipples at the fanciest event in the world -- literally dressed like Leeloo from "The Fifth Element" -- at least that's what she's saying now ... claiming the photo she posted online Monday was a joke.

Sources close to the singer tell TMZ, she was just kidding when she posted the photo with the caption, "What i wanted to wear to Met Ball but Anna [Wintour] said Not this year! So I'm gonna work on music instead?"

Our sources say Madonna didn't even have plans to go to the Gala ... she was in the studio Monday night during the event and will stay there all week.

This just in: Madonna is 55 years old.

Naya Rivera made men around the country gleeful when she was spotted out in Cabo this weekend wearing an incredibly tiny bikini.

No matter what happens with "Glee," it's clear Naya has the body of work to go far.

Did someone order a redheaded Prince?

Newly single and ready to mingle, Prince Harry hit up the pool at the Soho House in Miami Thursday while in town for a friend's bachelor party. Harry reportedly just broke up with Cressida Bonas after nearly two years together.

Harry and his friends partied at LIV nightclub at the Fontainebleau Hotel Wednesday night ... after dinner at Hakkasan. We're told Harry was rolling with about 13 guys at the club (not including security) and partied till about 2:30 AM.

Rihanna loves to be nekkid ... A LOT ... but Instagram says her displays of public nudity go way too far -- and is now threatening the singer within an inch of her exposed nipples.

Rihanna posted topless snaps Tuesday from her photo shoot with Lui, a French skin mag -- and within an hour IG yanked 'em down ... because they violated rules against nudity.

Our Instagram sources tell us Rihanna got an email that basically warned her ... keep your clothes on or risk having your account permanently shut down.

But like a bikini trying to contain her boobs -- IG couldn't stop RiRi ... and she just posted the banned nudes on Twitter instead.

Thank you, Twitter.

Carmen Electra stuck her tongue in a warm, familiar place last night ... Dave Navarro's mouth -- and the exes weren't shy about it.

They were walking into a hard rock award show in downtown L.A. when they took a moist selfie, which Dave tweeted, saying ... "May get lucky with one tonight."

Carmen and Dave divorced in 2007 after 3 and a half years of marriage ... and a reality show.

Who says you can't go back?

Based on how Carmen looks in this video -- we definitely get it, Dave.

Pink is the new orange -- ex-Playboy Playmate Colleen Shannon is back on the party scene after her recent prison stint ... celebrating her release with a weekend full of champagne-fueled ragers ... and we got pics.

TMZ broke the story ... Shannon was sentenced to 4 months in federal prison after trying to sneak her BF across the Canadian border last year. She pled guilty to transporting an alien.

But last weekend, Shannon made up for lost time -- partying 3 DAYS STRAIGHT -- Thursday at 340 Nightclub in Pomona, Friday at The Attic in Hollywood, and Saturday at Industry Nightclub in the City of Industry.

Shannon was officially released from prison on March 31, but since her birthday is April 14 ... we're told she postponed her release parties in order to celebrate both occasions.

Here's former "Dancing With the Stars" host Brooke Burke (left) on the set of a commercial yesterday in Los Angeles ... and current "DWTS" host Erin Andrews (right) in New York City last month.

The question is ...

Serena Williams showed off a little skin yesterday, frolicking in the ocean and enjoying the glorious weather of Miami.

In the battle for the best butt around ... advantage Williams.

Heidi Klum busted out her awesome 40-year-old rack in Mexico with her much-younger BF Vito Schnabel -- and she also dispelled a longstanding myth about dating Black guys.

Good for you, Vito!

This is fantastic: Kate Upton -- one of the hottest women in the world -- has bravely taken it upon herself to dispel crazy reports she's insecure about her body ... insisting she loves every inch of her flawless physique.

The Sun newspaper ran a story over the weekend purporting to quote Kate, who allegedly said, "I wish I had smaller boobs every day of my life." But Kate now insists she never said that.

She just tweeted, "Unfortunately, what was said about my body is completely made up to try and drum up controversy where there is none. Like every woman, I have moments of insecurity, but I love and am proud of my body -- every part of it -- and wouldn't change a thing."

That's right. Kate Upton wouldn't change a thing about her body. Imagine that.

Heidi Klum's new boyfriend, 27-year-old Vito Schnabel, went topless yesterday as he palled around in the ocean with Heidi in Tulum, Mexico.

Oh, did we mention SHE WAS TOPLESS TOO?!?!?!?

Schnabel is an art dealer in New York City. He's been previously linked to Demi Moore, Elle Macpherson and Liv Tyler. His father is Julian Schnabel ... director of films like "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly," "Before Night Falls," and "Basquiat."

What isn't Gilbert Grape eating? Leonardo DiCaprio hit the beach last week with his 21-year-old supermodel girlfriend looking rounder than usual ... but the fact is, Leo's so rich and awesome, it doesn't matter.

Days before dancing like a weirdo at Coachella, Leo and his GF Toni Garrn vacationed in Bora Bora. While Toni removed her top and unleashed her boobs, Leo removed his top and unleashed his as well.

And no one cared ... because he's Leonardo DiCaprio.

Seriously, though. We're big fans.

She adds, "Every single day, I'm like, 'Oh, man, it would be so much easier,' especially if people didn't constantly bring them up." This coming from the girl who constantly flaunts her boobs in magazines like Sports Illustrated, Vogue and Vanity Fair and made a fortune off her floaters.

Kate says she wishes her jugs were more like clip-ons ... so she could take them on and off as she pleases.

Ladies, the angry mob line starts to your left.