This is not a trick, Michael -- "Arrested Development" star Will Arnett has officially filed for divorce from Amy Poehler ... nearly two years after the couple separated.
According to court documents, Arnett wants joint legal and physical custody of their two sons aged 5 and 3. He also wants visitation.
43-year-old Arnett and 42--year-old Poehler got married in 2003.
Since they separated, Arnett has reportedly been dating Billy Joel's ex-wife Katie Lee and Poehler has been linked to comedian Nick Kroll.
This is Arnett's second divorce and Poehler's first.
Cuts Off His Penis
in Suicide Attempt
4/16/2014 8:34 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
A rapper affiliated with Wu-Tang Clan was rushed to the hospital early Wednesday after he cut off his penis and then jumped off a second story balcony in what police believe was a suicide attempt ... law enforcement sources tell TMZ.
Our sources say ... cops were called to an apartment building in North Hollywood at around 1:00 AM and found Christ Bearer -- aka Andre Johnson -- on the sidewalk critically injured.
Christ Bearer is a member of the rap group Northstar ... a group discovered by members of Wu-Tang Clan. Two members of a group Bearer collaborates with live in the same apartment building and tell TMZ they were there early this morning when Christ Bearer suddenly -- without warning -- cut off his penis and jumped off the balcony. They say they were not on "any hard drugs that would cause him to do such a thing."
The two men say they rushed downstairs and Christ Bearer had already jumped up and began screaming incoherently.
Johnson was rushed by ambulance to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center. It's unclear if doctor's are attempting to reattach Johnson's penis.
Johnson is a rapper who was in a group founded by members of Wu-Tang Clan.
Charged with Assault
Arrest Warrant Issued
4/16/2014 1:15 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
"Real Housewives of Atlanta" star Porsha Williams is a wanted woman ... as in we've learned there's a warrant out for her arrest.
ATL cops are going after Porsha over a fight she had with Kenya Moore on the set of the show. Porsha allegedly attacked Kenya, who filed a police report. The show has the raw footage, and that was enough to charge Porsha with misdemeanor battery -- thus the warrant.
Porsha's lawyer, Joe Habachy, tells TMZ she will surrender Thursday.
We're also told Porsha plans to go after Kenya ... she wants the D.A. to file felony aggravated assault charges against Moore.
Hires Round-the-Clock Security
After Stalker Makes Stink
4/16/2014 12:20 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Kris Jenner's taking no chances after Kim Kardashian came face-to-face with a stinky stalker outside the Jenner home last month -- Kris has now hired 24/7 security.
Kardashian sources tell TMZ, guards are parked outside the family home in 2 vehicles which monitor her Hidden Hills estate 24 hours a day -- and the guards are ARMED.
We're told she's paying several thousand bucks a month for the hired muscle.
Kris has had her share of scares over the last year -- threatening phone calls, paparazzi intruders, SWAT pranks -- but the stinker was the last straw.
TMZ broke the story, the 20-year-old man was taken into custody after allegedly sneaking onto Kris' property. Kim called security, who then alerted police. We're told the kid claimed he was Kendall Jenner's boyfriend and Justin Bieber's stepbrother. Oh yeah, and he smelled like death.
TV Star Giselle Fernandez
NEWSFLASH ... It's Over ... And I'm Rich
4/15/2014 4:11 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Journalist and TV host Giselle Fernandez just lost 180 pounds ... by dumping her husband after 11 years of marriage ... and according to legal docs, she's quick to point out ... she makes a fortune.
52-year-old Fernandez filed for legal separation from business exec John Farrand on Friday, citing irreconcilable differences.
And this is interesting ... Giselle is NOT asking for spousal support, saying in her docs, "I was the breadwinner." Giselle claims she typically works 40 hours a week and earns an impressive $41,667 per month.
Other fun stuff -- Fernandez claims she spends $6,500 a month on rent and $2,000 on GROCERIES.
The couple was married at their Beverly Hills home back in November 2002. They have a 7-year-old daughter, and Giselle wants joint custody.
In addition to "Access Hollywood," Fernandez guest anchored for "CBS Early Show," "CBS Evening News," "NBC Today," "NBC Nightly News," and even appeared on "Dancing with the Stars" (she didn't last long).
to DWI, Speeding
4/15/2014 8:40 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Dina Lohan has something in common with her daughter Lindsay now ... after she pled guilty this morning to aggravated DWI and speeding in a Long Island courtroom ... TMZ has learned.
According to courtroom sources, Lohan must do 100 hours of community service. She is expected to have her license revoked and an interlock device will be installed in her vehicle.
We're told she must also attend a mandatory drinking and driving program, a victim impact panel and also pay the necessary fines and fees.
As TMZ previously reported, Lohan was busted last September with a blood alcohol level twice the legal limit.
Lana Del Rey
Photog Will Sue Over Video Shoot
I Was Slashed With a Razor
4/15/2014 7:04 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
A Lana Del Rey film shoot turned into a bloody brawl ... according to a photog who claims he was attacked by 3 thugs with a box cutter ... to stop him from taking pics of LDR ... and he's gonna sue.
Karl Larsen -- a well-known concert photographer who shoots for Rolling Stone magazine -- claims in a lawsuit that will be filed later this week ... he happened on the L.A. River last June and saw Del Rey shooting her "Tropico" video ... and was confronted by 3 dudes from the production company.
Larsen says the men ordered him to stop shooting ... when Larsen insisted he was within his rights ... one guy threatened to smash his $14K camera gear and another tried to rip it from his hand.
Larsen claims one of the men whipped out a box cutter razor and slashed his finger -- which required stitches -- while another guy grabbed his camera and erased the memory card.
Larsen's suit against the production company, Black Hand Cinema, seeks $1 MIL minimum -- claiming the company has a habit of intimidating photographers.
We've reached out to reps for Lana and the production company ... so far, no word back.
The IRS Is Too Illegit To Quit
4/14/2014 3:31 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
MC Hammer says the IRS is shamefully out to get him ... belatedly demanding penalties on taxes he fully paid 7 years ago.
Hammer famously went belly up in 1996 -- declaring bankruptcy and in the process losing everything, including his master recordings and most worldly possession.
Hammer got out from under his debt by anteing up more than $7 mil in 2007, and that amount included more than $1.4 million to the IRS.
Now -- 7 years later -- hammer says Uncle Sam has just demanded another $1.4 mil -- this time for penalties and interest on the delinquent 1996 taxes.
Hammer thinks it's a travesty, and has filed legal docs asking a judge to block the IRS from collecting because of basic principles of fairness.
After Bus Stop Crash
4/14/2014 3:07 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Former "CSI" star Jose Zuniga's white SUV is in pieces -- after his car crashed through a bus stop in Hollywood moments ago.
Zuniga -- who has also appeared in pretty much every other TV show you've ever seen -- tells us, he was rear-ended ... and the other car sent him careening through a nearby bus stop. He landed in a construction area. We're told a third car was also involved, but damage to the other cars wasn't as bad.
Thankfully, we're told no one was injured. The fire department responded to the scene shortly afterward.
Leo DiCaprio's Co.
We Have a Right to Do Movies
About Inbred Hillbillies
4/14/2014 1:44 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Leo DiCaprio thinks the guys claiming his company defamed them by calling them "inbreds" in the movie "Out of the Furnace" may not be inbreds ... but they're stupid for suing.
DiCaprio's production company just asked a judge to toss the lawsuit filed by 17 members of the Ramapough Lunaape Nation -- a tribe in the Ramapo Mountains of New Jersey.
The tribe's beef -- the villain of the movie, Harlan DeGroat, played by Woody Harrelson, shares the last name of some of them and they believe they're the target of the flick's disparaging references.
Aside from the "inbred" comment, the real-life DeGroat says it's defamatory to make them look like murderous, drug-addicted scofflaws.
DiCaprio's company claims the law -- specifically the First Amendment -- allows them to portray criminal gangs in movies.
Here's the best part ... Leo's company points out there's a rich history of movies depicting various groups -- "The Godfather" portrayed Italian gangs, "The Departed" showed Irish gangs, and, our favorite, "Once Upon a Time In America" features a Jewish Gang ... who knew?
I Get a Good Feeling ...
$1.2 Million Tax Bill Cleared
4/14/2014 9:30 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Flo Rida is no longer a tax fugitive -- the rapper has just settled with Uncle Sam over a $1.2 million tax bill.
The feds filed the tax lien against Flo earlier this year, claiming he owed a total of $1,197,655 in back taxes stemming from the years 2009 - 2011.
It's unclear if Flo paid the full amount -- but whatever he paid, the government was happy ... because it just extinguished the lien ... meaning he's off the hook.
Now if only he could figure out all this baby mama drama...
Johnny Weir, Victor Voronov
But Only If Johnny ...
4/14/2014 1:00 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Clear the mantle ... the Faberge Eggs are coming home, because TMZ has learned Johnny Weir's super-nasty divorce to Victor Voronov is off ... but there are strings attached.
TMZ broke the story ... Johnny blindsided Victor with divorce papers last month and things turned immediately ugly with each accusing the other of heinous conduct.
Now multiple sources connected to the couple tell TMZ ... over the weekend Victor and Johnny agreed to reconcile and Johnny plans to move back into the family homestead today. He was in L.A. shooting a show over the weekend.
Now the strings ... we're told Victor wants Johnny to sign a document agreeing to publicly apologize for all the nasty things he said about Victor. Johnny must also agree in writing that he will no longer let his mother meddle in the marriage ... and she has to keep her nose out of their finances.
We're told they were squabbling Sunday over the document ... what a shock.
Selena Gomez' Parents
BLINDSIDED By Firing
4/14/2014 12:45 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF
Selena Gomez's mom claims she got ZERO warning that the singer was axing her as her manager ... until TMZ broke the story.
Selena's mom Mandy Teefey says she and Selena's stepdad sat down with the singer Thursday after TMZ's story ... and asked Selena if she was absolutely sure she wanted to move in a different direction. Selena said yes.
Mandy tells us she thought last month's conversation was just talk ... and she's having a hard time processing the fact that she's no longer Selena's manager.
Selena's mom and stepdad had managed the 21-year-old since her big break at Disney -- but as we reported, Selena told her parents she'd outgrown them and wanted bigger management.
Mandy says she respects her daughter's decision ... and plans to continue producing several movie projects with Selena, including the upcoming "The Sky Is Everywhere."