Joe Rogan No Way Conor McGregor Retires Unless ...

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JOE'S THEORY
'The Joe Rogan Experience' Podcast

Joe Rogan ain't buyin' Conor McGregor's retirement tweet ... saying there's no way McGregor will hang 'em up "unless he got f*cking head kicked today and knocked into oblivion."

Rogan -- who's been the color commentator for the UFC for nearly 20 years -- was on his "Joe Rogan Experience" podcast Tuesday when the news broke about Conor's tweet and Joe's reaction was about as honest as it gets.

Rogan made a couple of interesting points ... noting McGregor was ringside at an MMA fight in Dublin earlier this month, in which a fighter was beaten so badly, he died from his injuries ... and Conor may have been affected by what he saw.

He also noted McGregor came thiiiiis close to retiring from MMA right before he got his first deal with the UFC -- because some of his close friends were having health issues.

But all that aside, Rogan says he just doesn't believe the announcement is legit -- saying, "There's no way, he'd do it like this."

We'll see ...

Iggy Azalea Even Though I Blab About Nick I Want My Privacy!!!

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Iggy Azalea is telling all of us we should be ashamed we dare to talk about her and Nick Young, because she's entitled to her privacy ... even though she's talked ad nauseam about her relationship.

Iggy tweeted on Monday, "We are together and i would love to be given a little (a lot) of privacy on the matter."

She's incredulous the media -- including us -- have showcased her bare ring finger ... a finger that had reliably sported her engagement ring until the cheating allegations surfaced.

It's especially interesting ... She went on "Ellen" and a bunch of radio shows talking endlessly about the scandal, threatening to cut Nick's penis off, showing off her ring, and on and on.

But now she can't believe everyone bit the bait. Just amazing.

AC/DC's Brian Johnson Don't Bury Me Yet I'm Still Our Lead Singer

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Sorry Axl Rose ... AC/DC's Brian Johnson is "no quitter" and wants everyone to know his hearing issues will NOT force him to retire from the band.

On the heels of the news Axl's taking over lead singer duties for AC/DC's remaining European tour dates ... Johnson says, doctors advised him to stop performing shows in arenas or stadiums "where the sound levels are beyond my current tolerance, without the risk of substantial hearing loss and possibly total deafness."

However, he says he's still good to go in studio, and plans to do that when AC/DC records again. Brian will also continue getting treatments, and "I am hoping that in time my hearing will improve and allow me to return to live concert performances."

In other words ...

Joe Manganiello Hospitalized with Very Dangerous Appendicitis

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Joe Manganiello was sidelined over the last few days because of appendicitis and a surgery that was extremely serious ... TMZ has learned.

Sources connected with the actor tell us, Joe went into the hospital late last week to have his appendix removed, but when doctors went in they were alarmed. We do not conclusively know the nature of the problem, but one source says his appendix burst.

Joe, who cancelled an event Sunday, was still in the hospital as of last night.

Joe's rep has said he has a chronic condition and suggested that's why he missed his Sunday appearance. We know he ripped a bicep during shooting of 'Magic Mike' and had surgery as a result. We also know the bicep is an ongoing problem, but we're told appendicitis is what kept him away last week.

Rob Kardashian Talks Wedding, TV Specials & Cheating ...On His Diet

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Rob Kardashian is now FULLY out of his shell ... he just talked to us about everything under the sun -- his wedding, his weight loss, and his biggest vice with Blac Chyna.

BlacRob just touched down at LAX -- returning from weekend appearances in NYC and Boston -- and he was a regular chatty Cathy. He addressed the story TMZ broke about producers making big money offers for them to televise their wedding.

Sounds like they're not impressed with any of the deals. Yet.

Rob also says he's dropped 40-50 lbs. so far, but he's not even counting anymore because he's too busy being happy. Just watch -- honestly, it's been years, if ever, since we've seen Rob this talkative.

He even broke some news to us about his driver license -- and let's just say Uber's gonna love him!

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I LOST MY LICENSE

Guns N' Roses Lana Del Rey's in With the Band ... But NOT Opening Act

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Bad news for any Guns N' Roses fans hoping to see Lana Del Rey warm up crowds on their tour.

The moody indie singer is NOT opening for GNR despite a flurry of rumors after Lana posted a pic wearing a jacket that read "Lana Del Rey Guns N' Roses 2016 Tour."

We're told Axl Rose gifted the personalized satin tour jackets to his friends and family. Lana was one of a couple dozen who got the hookup. Sources close to the unexpected pals tell us they've been tight for years.

We're told Lana met Axl through a mutual friend -- her ex-boyfriend Justin Murdock, billionaire heir to the Dole Food Company.

Lana ditched Murdock in 2012, but she obviously got Axl in the breakup.

LeBron James Heat Want You Back ... Says Gabrielle Union

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HE STARTED THIS FASHION ISH

Get nervous, Cleveland ... 'cause if LeBron James is testing the waters about a return to Miami, Gabrielle Union says her husband's team would "welcome him back with open arms."

We got Mrs. Dwyane Wade out in Beverly Hills and had to ask her thoughts on a possible reunion of the Big 3 ... mostly due to the rumors LeBron is already fed up with the Cavs.

Gabby's definitely into the idea ... and why not? Bron and Wade did win 2 championships together.

Plus, LBJ and D-Wade are super BFFs ... they even worked out together in Miami in the middle of the NBA season ... rubbing some CLE people the wrong way.

Not saying Cleveland should get the lighters ready just yet, but we're not NOT saying that either.

Mohamed Hadid Lisa Vanderpump Is Dead To Me!!!

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Lisa Vanderpump's calling BS on Mohamed Hadid's kids suffering from Lyme disease, and her accusation is having major repercussions for the 'Real Housewives' shoots.

Sources tell TMZ Lisa and Mohamed's 20 year friendship came to an abrupt end when Vanderpump, for the umpteenth time, asked about his kids, Bella and Anwar, and their Lyme disease. We're told Hadid was embarrassed because Lisa asked while taping at dinner with friends.

Sources close to the situation tell us Hadid will be cordial during shoots, but ANY attempt to renew the friendship -- even for the show -- is out of the question, as far as he's concerned.

We're told Lisa's husband, Ken, even tried to patch things up, but Hadid's not budging ... and hasn't even been to any of Lisa's 3 restaurants since the drama.

Lucky for him it's a big city.

Courteney Cox and Johnny McDaid Kiss Me Again and Just Forget The World

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Courteney Cox and ex-fiance Johnny McDaid are back together 5 months after calling off their engagement.

Courteney and the Snow Patrol guitarist both flew into Heathrow Thursday on different flights but landed at the same time ... and that's not the kind of kiss you give an ex you happen to bump into at an airport.

All signs pointed to a reunion in March after the two were spotted all over L.A. together, but they've denied they're giving things a second chance.

Or maybe Courteney's just following in her BFF's footsteps and planning a secret wedding of her own ... not that we won't find out.

Jeanie Buss Phil Jackson's NOT Coming to Lakers ... 'Just Rumors'

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HE WON'T BE BACK

Sorry, Lakers ... the Zen Master is NOT returning to L.A. -- this according to Phil Jackson's fiancee Jeanie Buss.

The rumors have been swirling for months ... with several NBA insiders hinting that Jackson may have a secret exit strategy in place to leave his gig as president of the Knicks and return to Laker Land.

But Jeanie (co-owner and president of the Lakers) says it's 100% BS -- telling TMZ Sports, "Don't listen to that ... Phil is in New York. He signed a 5 year deal."

As for rumors that Kobe Bryant may join the Lakers front office -- Jeanie says, "Kobe can do whatever he wants."

So, offer on the table then???

Lindsey Vonn 'Just Friends' with 'Vikings' Star ... But I'm Open Minded!

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YOU SAY HE'S JUST A FRIEND

Some bad news, good news ...

The bad news -- Lindsey Vonn says she's "just friends" with "Vikings" star Alexander Ludwig.

The good news -- she's "open-minded" about letting him out of the friend zone.

31-year-old Lindsey and 23-year-old Ludwig got people talking last week when they left Craig's in L.A. together lookin' pretty damn couply after a fancy dinner together.

But Vonn says there's no official relationship ... yet ... saying she barely knows the guy.

Here, Lindsey ... maybe this pic will help change your mind.

Waiting for your permission to load the Instagram Media.

Post Malone I Choked Bieber But We Were Just Playing

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Post Malone put his hands around Justin Bieber's throat and choked him in front of a club full of people, but there was no bad blood ... as some reports suggest.

The Saturday night incident inside Houston's Cle nightclub might've looked like a fight ... but we're told the guys were just messing around and went back to laughing once Post loosened his grip.

Sources close to Malone tell TMZ the choke was Malone's revenge for Bieber using his arm as an ashtray earlier that night.

Boys will be boys.

Megan Fox In Case You're Wondering Who's the Daddy ...

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Megan Fox has been giving multiple clues on the identity of her baby daddy, and by process of elimination it's pretty clear ... Brian Austin Green is the leading candidate.

A noticeably pregnant Megan and her estranged hubby strolled into a Santa Monica restaurant Tuesday for lunch.

It's relevant because earlier in the day Megan Instagrammed pics of 3 of her recent co-stars -- Shia LaBeouf, Will Arnett and Jake Johnson -- with the hashtag, #notthefather.

TMZ broke the story last August when Megan filed for divorce, but she's been cozy with Brian and their 2 kids recently, so it seems highly likely at the very least they're having their 3rd kid.

Will Smith Barely Drank at Restaurant ... Before Shooting

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Will Smith did NOT appear drunk when he left a New Orleans restaurant ... moments before he was shot to death -- this according to restaurant management.

TMZ Sports spoke to employees at Sake Cafe Uptown ... the last place Smith was seen before the shooting. The incidents with Cardell Hayes reportedly began after he left the eatery.

There are theories that Smith was sloshed at dinner ... and was driving impaired when he got into it with Hayes.

But management at Sake Cafe Uptown say they're not buying it -- insisting Smith only had 1 glass of wine during the roughly 75 minutes he was at the restaurant.

"He got there kinda late ... didn't drink a lot at all ... no cocktails, and I can only remember seeing one glass of wine," one staffer tells TMZ Sports.

As for his state of mind when he left -- we're told, "Everyone seemed completely composed."

Khloe Kardashian Old Habits Die Hard ... Clubbin' with French

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I JUST CAN'T QUIT YOU

Khloe Kardashian stayed in her comfort zone Sunday night, hitting the clubs with ex-bf French Montana, hours after writing a manifesto on why she's done trying to save Lamar Odom.

Khloe and French hit up Hyde in Hollywood, along with Kylie Jenner and The Weeknd.

Mrs. Odom posted a long essay Sunday revealing she is now done trying to save Lamar Odom. She had an epiphany that trying to help him could actually breed resentment and ultimately destroy him.

Khloe and French left the club together ... unclear if that means anything.

Rob Kardashian & Blac Chyna Quickie Wedding in the Works ... Kardashians Will Be Invited

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Rob Kardashian and Blac Chyna will be married within a year in front of the entire Kardashian family, or that's at least plan A for the couple ... TMZ has learned.

Sources close to the couple tell us BC and Rob don't want a long, drawn out engagement -- so they're already talking about ceremony ideas, and even a guest list. We're told they're certain they want Rob's family to be there.

That's an impressive olive branch since, as we told you ... Kris Jenner and Rob's sisters aren't sold the engagement's even real.

As for where they do it -- a quickie wedding makes ya think Las Vegas, and chapels are drooling at the possibility of corralling Rob and his famous fam. Reps at the Little Vegas Chapel are offering "Blac Rob" ... 2 Elvises, 2 showgirls and a pink Caddy convertible for pick up and drop off.

Meanwhile, the Little White Wedding Chapel -- where Britney Spears once married (briefly) -- is aiming high with a helicopter ceremony above the strip. They'll even throw in ground transport with a 14-seat Hummer for the whole family, if they RSVP.

That's a big IF, right now.