You Might Want to Rethink

The Atlanta Police Dept. tells TMZ ... they DID NOT give Reese Witherspoon a free hat after her arrest -- in fact, cops say the "A.P.D." cap she was wearing this weekend is nothing more than a CHEAP, UGLY KNOCKOFF!

We spoke to Senior Officer Stanionis from the Public Affairs office of the APD, who told us point blank -- "We did not give her that hat. We have no idea where she got that hat."

"In fact, that’s an awful hat," Stanionis continued ... "Looks like a patch glued onto a hat and it’s not a good one."

Patrick Schwarzenegger used a FAKE ID to get into a Hollywood club this weekend ... and was only kicked out after he pelted the house DJ with ice cubes ... sources connected to the club tell TMZ.

We're told ... Arnold's kid -- who's only 19 years old -- used someone else's driver's license to get past the bouncers at The Sayers Club in L.A. on Saturday night ... and it worked.

But once he was inside, we're told Patrick was a total pain in the ass.

Sources tell us Patrick was rowdy and obnoxious ... and at one point, he began throwing ice cubes at the DJ. (His father did play Mr. Freeze, after all).

Once the ice began to fly, we're told club honchos recognized Patrick -- realized he was underage -- and kicked him out ASAP.

After he got the boot, TMZ shot footage of Patrick ranting about wanting to beat up the DJ.

Patrick wasn't arrested -- but using a fake ID is a misdemeanor in California, punishable by up to a year in jail and a $1,000 fine.

His father probably knew that already ... since, you know, he was the governor.

With less than a week to go until her court-ordered stint in rehab, Lindsay Lohan hit the NYC bar scene Monday night ... AND ACTUALLY BEHAVED HERSELF!!!

TMZ has learned ... Lohan spent her Monday evening at The Bitter End -- the piano bar credited with giving Lady Gaga her start back in the day.

Sources at the bar tell us ... Lohan rolled in to the place with 9 or 10 friends to watch some of her pals perform at a "Jam Fest" event.

We're told Lindsay sat quietly at her table for roughly 3 hours and didn't suck down one drop of alcohol -- just soda.

One source inside the bar tells us Lohan was so "very well behaved" ... people in the joint barely even noticed the actress.

As for Lindsay, she's expected to enter a treatment center in the Hamptons on May 2 -- where she's supposed to complete a 90-day program.

... Miami Dolphins wide receiver Mike Wallace!!

Just HOURS after NBA player Jason Collins announced he's gay, 26-year-old Wallace took right to Twitter to provide the first ignorant comment.

“All these beautiful women in the world and guys wanna mess with other guys SMH (shakin' my head) …”

30 minutes later, Wallace deleted his tweet and replaced it with a half-assed explanation:

"Never said anything was right or wrong I just said I don't understand!! Deeply sorry for anyone that I offended."

Anne Hathaway's parents didn't raise her right -- because she hopped into the car of a TOTAL STRANGER ... rather than have to talk to one of our photogs.

The "Bride Wars" star had just landed at LAX and rushed right into the first waiting SUV she could find, but it wasn't her ride. Rather than get out of the car, she politely asked the driver if she could stay until her car came ... and he said yes!

Anne's ride eventually showed and she quickly jumped out of the wrong car and into the right one.

On a day meant to celebrate love, commitment, honesty and faithfulness ... Michael Jordan chose to invite the man who has come to symbolize the OPPOSITE of all that, Tiger Woods, to his wedding.

Lindsay Lohan has allegedly blown off YET ANOTHER legal case ... this one involving a nanny who claims LiLo smacked her with a Maserati.

TMZ broke the story ... Linds was sued last year by Nubia Del Carmen Preza, who claims LiLo ran a red light, injuring her and barely missing the baby stroller she was pushing back in 2010.

The nanny's lawyer filed legal docs demanding that Lindsay answer certain questions about the incident, but apparently Lindsay blew it off and never responded.

As for what questions the nanny wanted answered ... did you hit me, did you fail to stop, was someone else in your car -- stuff like that.

A hearing is set for May 8 where a judge will decide whether to sock Lindsay with fines for ignoring the questions.

Reese Witherspoon learned the hard way -- if you have to tell someone, "Do you know who I am?" ... you're NOT as famous as you think you are, this according to David Spade.

Spade was leaving Boa Steakhouse in Hollywood last night when we asked if there's ever a good time for a star to drop the "I'm a really big deal" schtick ( a la Reese) ... and the "Rules of Engagement" star gave it to us straight.

"If you have to explain to someone you're famous, then you're technically not that famous."

Question: Where is the last place on Earth you should bring your dad and your kid?
Answer: Your sex tape negotiation. Ewwwwwwwwwww!!!!!

But that's exactly what "Teen Mom" star Farrah Abraham did on Sunday when she hit up the offices of Vivid Entertainment to negotiate a possible deal for her sex tape.

Farrah told our photog she is negotiating with two other companies and that she is considering Vivid's offer. She said she only brought her father along "for support" ... but when you check out the video, you can tell how uncomfortable he is about the whole thing.

Our photog also spoke to Vivid honcho Steve Hirsch after the meeting ... and even he thought bringing a young child to a porn office was a bad idea.

At least someone is the voice of reason.

Before leading cops on a city-wide manhunt, Boston bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev was busy partying it up with friends in a college dorm room ... this just two days after his deadly attack on the Boston Marathon.

The bombs went off on Monday and while law enforcement pored over photos searching for a lead, Tsarnaev went back to his dorm at UMass Dartmouth and acted like a regular non-terrorist college kid, according to the Boston Globe.

He reportedly slept in his dorm, went to the gym and then partied Wednesday night with pals from his intramural soccer team. A student source told the paper, "He was just relaxed."

The 19-year-old even tweeted before the shin-dig ... "I'm a stress-free kind of guy."

But by Friday, Tsarnaev's face was plastered over every media outlet, the UMass campus went into lockdown mode, his brother -- the other bombing suspect -- had been shot dead and Tsarnaev was finally captured ... after an intense stand-off with police, which left him wounded.

Lil Scrappy has pissed off the police ... because he allegedly refused to piss for police ... and now a warrant has been issued for his arrest, TMZ has learned.

The urine controversy bubbled to the surface back in March ... when the "Love & Hip-Hop: Atlanta" star was required to submit to a pee test in Georgia as part of his probation, stemming from a 2008 pot arrest.

Problem is ... officials say Scrappy tried to turn in a urine sample that was cold to the touch ... and cops believe it may have been tampered with. They refused to accept the sample ... and told Scrappy to provide a fresh cup of yellow gold.

But Scrappy refused the pee demand, denied the allegations of tampering and left the premises ... so officials issued a warrant for his arrest, claiming he once again violated his probation by not cooperating.

We spoke to Scrappy's lawyer, Mawuli Mel Davis, who tells us Scrappy plans to appear in court on May 16 to address the issue -- and says, "It is our hope that the Judge will recall the revocation warrant that is currently pending against Mr. Richardson."

He adds, "Since Mr. Richardson’s release from jail, he has been reporting to probation as ordered and doing his best to comply with all conditions of probation."

Cue up another round of apologies for Chris Culliver ... 'cause the SF 49ers player is in trouble again over a new set of offensive comments ... but this time, he went after women ... not gays.

Culliver -- the guy who went to sensitivity training after bashing gays right before the Super Bowl -- posted a screen grab of an iPhone conversation to Instagram last night ... in which he and some friends refer to women as "bitches" and "hoes."

Here's the convo:

Culliver's friend: This bitch talkin bout how I can take her on a nice dat ... yeah my car ... bitch you got a whole dude ... live in work you trippin.

Culliver: Lol yeah hoes be thinking more then they are. Boy I tell you

Culliver's friend: Right these hoes be trippin

The 49ers have released a statement saying "We are aware of the matter, and it is being handled internally."

A deadly serious deputy made an urgent radio call to his dispatcher, sounding the alarm that 20 shots were fired near an elementary school ... and TMZ has the audio.

The incident went down in Wilmington, N.C. last week, when a TV production crew -- working on a Stephen King show, "Under the Dome" -- staged a shootout scene in a park near the school. The shots were fake, but no one clued in police or school officials ... and they treated it like the real deal.

Prince Jackson was fully armed yesterday during a brief standoff with the LAPD ... wearing a revealing bright green Euro-trash muscle tee that completely exposed his boyish pythons.

The photog on scene says 16-year-old Prince -- who's only been driving a few months -- was given a warning for illegal strobe lights on the grill of his new truck. Prince removed them and went on his way.

It's a far cry from the boy Michael Jackson shielded for years.

Coolio should know better than to bring another woman home to the house he shares with his girlfriend ... and he should also know better than to allegedly punch her in the face.

TMZ has learned the rap legend -- aka Artis Ivey Jr. -- was popped on April Fools' Day after he allegedly pushed Anabella Chatman to the ground and punched her in the face. And to add insult to injury ... according to the police report, Coolio then hightailed it out of there with their toddler son and the other woman.

Actually ... he didn't get out clean. Anabella says Coolio struck her with his car as he beat his hasty retreat -- in fact, cops say she had tire marks on her leg. Pretty compelling evidence.

If Kim Kardashian were a man ... authorities would be opening a creeper investigation after she pointed a video camera at 17-year-old Kendall Jenner's outstretched body and rhapsodized about her booty.

Kim acknowledges the creep factor as she points the lens at her sis. What's interesting ... Kendall appears to be the hair heir apparent to the Kardashian throne, yet Kim is gushing over her sister's beauty.