You Might Want to Rethink

Too Short just told a judge he would NOT go on probation for violating his DUI plea deal, and the judge was more than agreeable ... so Short is now in jail.

TMZ broke the story ... the rapper was busted for DUI in 2013 and actually tried running from the cops without much success.

Short struck a very sweet deal in which he avoided jail and simply had to complete community service and spend 3 years on probation. It's a great deal because he had multiple DUIs on his record.

But Short came up short today in court because he didn't complete his community service. The judge offered him more time, provided he'd agree to 3 more years of probation, but Short was sick of being monitored, so he told the judge he'd rather serve time.

Short got his wish, and he's now in the first day of a 90-day sentence. The reality, though ... because of overcrowding, he'll probably be a free man soon.

Brandy Norwood's on Broadway in "Chicago" ... but she might want to stay of the NYC subways -- after she got humiliated while singing her heart out to a bunch of commuters.

Brandy went incognito -- wearing a hoodie and shades -- and belted out a few tunes, hoping to impress subway riders. No dice.

You've gotta see the Grammy winner fall flat. Best moment ... one passenger giving her an atta girl, and telling her to keep working at it.

Check out the vid. Swing and a miss.

50 Cent is down for the count after losing a multi-million dollar lawsuit ... he's just declared bankruptcy.

TMZ has confirmed ... 50 filed for bankruptcy on Monday, 3 days after Rick Ross' baby mama won a $5 million jury verdict against him.

50 is in a world of financial hurt. A jury awarded Lavonia Leviston the $5 mil after determining the rapper intentionally leaked a sex tape in which she was featured, in order to embarrass Ross.

50 has been ordered to produce proof of income and worth so the jury can determine punitive damages.

According to the bankruptcy filing -- a story first reported by Page 6 -- 50 says his assets are valued between $10 and $50 million but his liabilities are also between the same range.

On top of that, 50 lost a court case in which a jury socked him with a $17.2 million judgment over ripping off a headphones design.

The new Miss USA, and one of the runners-up, sucked up to Oprah Winfrey ... BIG TIME -- demanding her face be slapped on the new $10 bill, even though she's lacking a major requirement ... DEATH.

The 5 finalists were all asked the same question -- who should grace the ten dollar when it's unveiled in 2020? Simple, right? Rosa Parks, Eleanor Roosevelt ... maybe a Betsy Ross?

Nope. Miss Oklahoma said she wishes it could be the big O, but Miss Maryland went all in! You've gotta see her ramble about Oprah and inspiration and ... stuff. Classic.

FYI, the Treasury says all candidates must be dead and represent democracy.

The only thing more entertaining all night was Miss Rhode Island talking political correctness. As an old southern woman would say, "Bless her heart."

Did Susan Boyle become the revered elder of a Native American tribe and forget to tell the world? Otherwise, she's got some explaining to do after choosing to wear a war bonnet at the T in the Park music festival in Scotland on Sunday.

J.K. Rowling just went all AVADA KEDAVRA on some pathetic cyber troll -- EVISCERATING an "idiot" who talked smack about Serena Williams.

The "Harry Potter" creator was giving mad props to Williams on Twitter for winning Wimbeldon -- saying, "I love her. What an athlete, what a role model, what a woman!"

Enter some schmuck named Rob, who tweeted back at Rowling -- "Ironic then that main reason for her success is that she is built like a man."

That's when Rowling delivered the "drop the mic" moment -- posting a pic of Serena looking SMOKIN' HOT in a dress ... and adding the caption, "'she is built like a man'. Yeah, my husband looks just like this in a dress. You're an idiot."

Goodnight Rob.

Ariana Grande cheats -- like most of us do -- on her diet, and she caved to the pressure in that donut shop.

Ariana reminded us last week, she's vegan ... but check out the video. As the singer and her BF Ricky Alvarez were leaving Wolfee Donuts in Elsinore, CA ... she got verrry curious about some of the delicious pastries surrounding her.

There are such things as vegan donuts, but we checked ... Wolfee doesn't carry 'em. The best part is she pulled the ole, "I want a half of one" trick.

6:00 PM PT -- Sean's doing his own mea culpa, saying ... "Just wanna apologize to Gavin and his family." He reiterated that he doesn't run his FB page, and added -- "It hurts.. Cause anyone and anybody that knows me know I'm far from that type of person. So from now on I'll post my own stuff.. Bless"

Sean Kingston cyber-bullied an autistic kid ... who had already been beaten black and blue in real life -- but Sean's team claims it's all a big misunderstanding.

The kid's name is Gavin Joseph ... and his mom posted a story explaining how bullies jumped him, and beat the daylights out of him. Despite the unprovoked attack, Gavin is not pressing charges.

The heartwarming story got a ton of kind responses on Facebook, until Sean's comment: “Tip of the day: If you start a fight, You better know how to fight or this will be happen! Pic#4 is insane! Ha!”

The internet went nuts about Kingston’s incredibly insensitive response, and blasted him with things like: “Dumb ass didn't even read the story before sharing it. You think it's funny they beat up a mentally disabled kid?” -- and, "Are u on drugs? Did u even read the story?”

Fact is ... Sean didn't read the story. We contacted his rep ... who said Sean's social media is run by an outside vendor. That vendor admitted to us, they had NOT read the whole post about Gavin, and THOUGHT they were "sending a message that it wasn't cool to pick on autistic kids because they'll fight back."

When we explained the autistic kid didn't fight back and got the hell beat out of him, they replied, "We messed up."

#ReadBeforeYouPost.

Just a couple flicks of Ariana Grande's tongue is all it took for that donut shop to get screwed -- it just failed a health inspection ... brought on by the video of her stunt.

The inspection report for Wolfee Donuts in Lake Elsinore, CA puts the blame for "donutgate" squarely on the employee who served Ariana and her BF. The report says the donut tray should not have been placed on top of the display case where anyone could access them.

Ariana's not mentioned by name in the inspector's report -- but it does reference the video TMZ first posted of "customers licking donuts incorrectly placed on counter."

A manager told the inspector the employee didn't know Ariana had tongued the goods, and "placed them back in display case for sale."

Bottom line ... the Health Department docked off one letter grade, leaving them with B rating. They have a week to fix the problems.

Ex-NFL Running back Thomas Jones is BLASTING Giants stud Jason Pierre-Paul ... saying JPP is a total BUFFOON for mangling his hand in a fireworks accident on the 4th of July.

Jones -- who spent 12 seasons in the league -- was commenting on the recent report that JPP had a finger amputated due to the severity of the fireworks injury ... and wrote bluntly:

"NOW THIS IS A MORON!!"

"These guys running around looking like Raptors with 3 and 4 fingers and s**t tryna light firecrackers at home. What the hell is goin on!!!"

He wasn't done ... Jones continued with another brutally honest message:

"Attention All NFL Players: LEAVE THE F*****G FIREWORKS ALONE!! YOU BUFOONS!!!!"

Ariana Grande burned herself badly in that donut shop ... by bashing fat Americans, and now many people think that's why she's bailing on a huge concert event.

We broke the story -- employees at a southern Cali donut shop were pissed because they said Ariana and her new BF licked donuts when no one was looking ... which would've been nasty enough.

But what's pissed off even more people is what happened later in the vid -- an employee brought out a tray of oversized donuts, and Ariana blurted ... "What the f**k is that? I hate Americans. I hate America."

Boom! Fat shaming on a national scale.

To be fair ... she's not the first to say it, but curiously Ariana announced yesterday she was dropping out of Major League Baseball's All-Star concert this weekend. Her people say it's because she had wisdom teeth removed on Monday.

But we gotta ask ...

Hope he enjoyed banging on the beach -- 'cause a Florida man's gonna be locked up in prison for the next 2 and a half years for doing the deed.

Jose Caballero was nabbed for having sex last summer with his girlfriend, Elissa Alvarez outside Tampa. Problem is these rocket scientists were banging in front of a woman with a camera -- and more importantly -- in front of little kids.

Witnesses say they weren't exactly quiet or discreet during the 25 minute encounter.

Both were found guilty of lewd or lascivious exhibition in front of a child, a second-degree felony -- and must register as sex offenders.

Paula Deen's hitting the delete button on her social media manager for re-posting an old photo of her son Bobby in "brown face" ... which naturally reminded everyone of Paula's racist scandal.

The photo -- from a 2011 Halloween episode of Paula's old TV show -- showed her as Lucille Ball, and Bobby as Ricky Ricardo ... complete with way too much dark makeup.

A rep for Deen tried to explain the faux pas, saying, "Paula immediately had this picture taken down as soon as she saw the post and apologizes to all who were offended" -- and the unnamed social media person was 86'd from Paula Deen Ventures.

A Canadian man was arrested for a PR stunt that took him up over Calgary in a lawn chair and balloons, just like the movie "UP" ... and might have gotten away with it if it wasn't for the weather.

Daniel Boria -- a professional skydiver, before you get any ideas -- floated up in a $20 lawn chair attached to about 100 balloons filled with helium.

The plan was to skydive into a local rodeo as a promotional stunt, but the 26 year-old got TOO high, balloons started popping... and then he was screwed. He crash landed into a field and injured his ankle.

Jenelle Evans never thought the Internet would explode over her dog playing with fireworks in a gnarly 4th of July video -- because, as she puts it ... they do it on "America's Funniest Home Videos."

Jenelle tells TMZ that it was all a misunderstanding after letting her dog, Jax, play fetch with a lit firework during her party in Myrtle Beach. On a video she posted of the stunt ... it sounds like she tells Jax to fetch the firework -- and that's what got people pissed.

Jenelle deleted her post off social media once the backlash started. She tells us she thought the vid was innocent, and adds ... she saw the same thing on 'AFV.'

Don't get it twisted though -- she says she's NOT sorry about letting Jax play with explosives, but she's sorry people were offended.

She insists the dog is fine, and she'd pull the same stunt next July.