Hook Ups

BUSTED!!! Justin Bieber's freeloading friend is NOT hooking up with Selena Gomez, even though he went to Herculean lengths to make it seem that way ... and we have video proof.

King Kevi -- who became famous-adjacent recently by living in Justin's house and throwing ragers with lots of girls, bongs and beer -- caused a stir when these pics (below) surfaced, showing the fake royalty appearing to leave Selena's San Fernando Valley estate Saturday night.

Various media reported Kevi -- the up-and-coming nobody -- was inside her house and "hung out." But we got our hands on surveillance footage taken the night in question ... showing Kevi posing in front of Selena's house while camera flashes went off ... but never making it past the gate.

Selena wasn't even home at the time the photos were taken.

In other words ... it was all a setup by the guy who is mooching off the Biebs.

He's no Kato Kaelin.

2:45 PM PT -- King Kevi tells TMZ the whole thing is a simple misunderstanding -- saying, "I was there to drop off something to a friend at the party. I walked multiple times to the front gate to try to call my friend and every time I had to chase off the photog."

He adds, "After the last attempt, I went to my car to leave and that's when my friend called me to come inside. When I backed in, I gave him another call to open the gate and he didn't pick up so I left because I saw the photog come back around."

Sad news from the Diddy camp ... the rap mogul says he's 100%, positively NOT having sexual relations with model Kate Upton ... despite the fact it would be totally awesome if true.

Reports surfaced this morning that Diddy and Double-Diddy were spotted making out at a NY restaurant last week ... and the Internet instantly exploded with jealousy.

But Diddy says it just ain't true ... tweeting, "Attn all Media. I don't even know Kate Upton personally! I'm not dating her! What's being reported is not true. END of story!"

Sad ...

A rep for Kate also tells TMZ ... Kate and Diddy "barely know each other" and they are definitely not dating.

Farrah Abraham is finally copping to shooting a full-on porn -- with A-list porn star James Deen -- but says even though it was intended for her personal scrapbook ... she's willing to sell it for $2 million.

The ex-"Teen Mom" star's reason for shooting the XXX video is simply the best ... telling TMZ she wanted to immortalize her smokin' hot 21-year-old body -- for her personal collection -- so she could look back on it when she's old.

Guess Olan Mills was booked?

Farrah, who initially denied a sex tape existed, says she's pissed at her penis-for-hire -- because Deen let the cat out of the bag ... telling our camera guy the whole staged shoot was Farrah's idea.

Farrah says she wants nothing to do with Deen now (we suspect that's mutual) and took a parting shot, telling us -- "If my ex-boyfriend Derek were alive, I would've rather it had been him with me."

Farrah's baby daddy Derek Underwood died in a car accident in 2008.

As for the sex vid going public ... Farrah says her lawyer is dealing with a porn company, and she "will not be settling for anything less than a couple million" bucks.

Here's a shocker ... "Teen Mom" Farrah Abraham's so-called "sex tape" with porn star James Deen was a SETUP ... devised by Farrah herself ... so says her XXX co-star James Deen.

Deen tells TMZ, he was approached by an unidentified porn company to shoot the porno with Farrah over the weekend ... and they did. He says the plan was to pass the porn off as a "sex tape," but the plan fell apart.

Deen believes the ruse began to unravel Sunday when he and Farrah were shot leaving the Vivid Entertainment offices, holding hands.

He says, "I think what happened is that [the porn company was] going to pass it off as a 'sex tape' and somebody saw us coming out of a building together and people asked me what's going on ... so I was like we're making a porno!" (Deen wouldn't say if the "company" was in fact Vivid.)

And the kicker ... despite Farrah's poorly-worded protests, Deen says she was the one behind it the whole time, telling us, "Everybody's trying to make it this story, but really [Farrah] wanted to make a sex tape."

But how good was she really? We had to ask ... and Deen doesn't hold back.

Vince Vaughn, Robert Pattinson and Joaquin Phoenix joined forces for what seemed like a totally random bros night out -- until our crack team uncovered their little blonde bond.

It's twue, it's twue ... it's reawwy twue ... James Deen's gargantuan penis IS the co-star in the Farrah Abraham sex tape ... at least according to James Deen.

Deen -- a professional porn star -- tells TMZ, "Word travels fast ... it isn't even edited yet. We shot it yesterday."

When asked if the two were dating, based on the fact they were seen holding hands yesterday, Deen said, "Definitely not dating. Got tested together on Friday and then saw her on set. That is my only experience with the lady."

As we first reported, the XXX footage is being shopped around to various porno companies -- including Vivid. We spoke to Vivid honcho Steve Hirsch who tells us he's seen the entire tape and says, "It's amazing ... and I'm doing everything in my power to get the rights to put it out."

Note -- if you don't get the first line in this post, you should really watch "Blazing Saddles."

Farrah Abraham was gettin' super hands on with one of the biggest male porn stars in the biz yesterday ... James Deen ... fueling rumors that he's the co-star in the "Teen Mom" star's sex tape.

Farrah and James -- who, along with having genitals that resemble an elephant trunk, once starred in a mainstream movie with Lindsay Lohan -- were photographed walking into the offices of Vivid Entertainment yesterday.

The two were holding hands ... but it's unclear if they're dating ... or just simply friends with professional benefits.

Farrah previously told TMZ she's AGAINST the release of the tape and is considering legal action to stop the footage from going public.

Prince Michael Jackson was out on a date with a girl who appears to be a princess ... TMZ has learned.

We got these pics of Prince and Remi Alfalah, who we're told is a Kuwaiti princess. They were bowling Wednesday at PINZ in the San Fernando Valley.

A source at the Kuwaiti consulate tells us ... Remi is indeed a princess who is a junior in high school. Michael Jackson's 16-year-old son Prince is also a junior. They attend the same private school.

Remi was dropped off at the bowling alley in a black SUV ... but he drove her home.

After recently getting back together, Hayden Panettiere and her giant boyfriend Wladimir Klitschko continued on their face sucking PDA tour by soaking up the sun -- and each other -- on the beach in Hollywood, Florida on Tuesday.

With rumors speculating they are already engaged, a ringless Hayden showed off her lady curves in a sexy purple fringe bikini, while Wlad bronzed his jacked up boxer's physique by going shirtless.

Magic Johnson's 20-year-old son hit the Sunset Strip, hand in hand with his boyfriend ... and his parents couldn't be happier for their kid.

Earvin Johnson III -- aka EJ -- is one of Magic's 3 kids. The Lakers legend tells TMZ, "Cookie and I love EJ and support him in every way." Magic goes on, "We're very proud of him."

The feeling is mutual ... 'cause EJ told us he's been "hoping and praying" for his dad's team, the Los Angeles Dodgers, ever since Magic and his business partners took over the franchise.

He's also a huge Lakers fan ... obviously.

EJ -- who's a student at NYU -- has a close relationship with his parents. Back in August, Magic tweeted, "Thx to my son EJ for hosting me at NYU. Look forward to taking him to dinner tonight in the city."

In the wake of her DUI arrest ... "Teen Mom" Farrah Abraham swore she's not a party girl -- and proved it by wearing skimpy lingerie, pounding booze, and making out with a chick in a nightclub!

"Teen Mom" star Farrah Abraham is telling people she's not a party girl and she got a DUI last week because of an illness ... a little hard to swallow after looking at these pictures.

The photos were snapped in January at Halo Ultra Lounge in Omaha. The promoter tells TMZ, Halo was hosting a lingerie soiree ... and Farrah showed up with a bunch of slutty-looking girls, all wearing next to nothing.

Then the boozing started ... with Farrah guzzling straight from the bottle.

You'll recall, just one day after Farrah was arrested for DUI last week -- blowing nearly twice the legal limit -- Farrah tweeted, "It's amazing what people believe and make up!"

Farrah says the reason the breathalyzer registered a .147 is because she was coughing a lot and couldn't blow properly.

They've been spotted out getting cozy again lately, but last night Hayden Panettiere and her ex-boyfriend Wladimir Klitschko put all those dating rumors to rest ... by gorging on their tongues in public.

With the entire American Airlines Arena watching, the itty bitty 23-year-old babe and her 6'6" Ukrainian boxing champ lover inhaled each other's mouths at the Miami Heat game in Florida on Sunday.

After previously dating for about two years, Hayden and Wlad ended their relationship back in 2011.

Glad to see they've kissed and made up.

It's official, Britney Spears has a new conservator boyfriend.

Rockin' her best corporate chic ensemble, the unchaperoned 31-year-old mother of two was spotted holding hands in public for the first time with new beau David Lucado at a mall in Thousand Oaks on Friday.

While they've been dating for weeks, this is their first real public display of affection since Brit Brit and 27-year-old David were spotted having dinner together on Valentine's Day.

As we told you ... David has no show biz ties. He's from Atlanta and is out here working for a law firm though not a lawyer. He's a dude of modest means.

If you've ever wondered what an Amanda Bynes mating call sounds like ... wonder no more -- because she is begging Drake to slay her genitals ... to put it delicately.

What Amanda said in a tweet last night was ... "I want Drake to murder my vagina."

Let that soak in.

Amanda has been exhibiting strange behavior since last year when she was charged in a couple of hit-and-run accidents, had her driver's license suspended, and fled Hollywood for NYC.

Drake has yet to respond to Amanda's offer, but he's not the violent type.

Unless you're Chris Brown.

Sorry you creepy weirdos ... Joe Jonas did NOT record a raunchy sex tape with his Swiss model GF ... despite reports to the contrary ... Joe's rep tells TMZ.

Reports have been circulating that Joe -- who once wore a purity ring espousing his virginity -- filmed himself doing the nasty with gf Blanda Eggenschwiler while under the influence of pot and alcohol. The reports claim the sex footage features some crazy BDSM stuff, including paddles and ball gags.

But Joe's rep tells TMZ, it's total BS ... no such tape exists.