The Kardashians

TMZ has obtained North West's birth certificate ... and she doesn't have a middle name!

What do Kim Kardashian's new baby and the Space Needle have in common?

They're both NORTH WEST ... TMZ has learned.

Seriously, that's the kid's name ... according to the birth certificate from Cedars-Sinai hospital.

There were rumors floating around a few months ago that Kim and Kanye West might give the baby a directional name ... but who thought they would actually go through with it?

And when you look at the options -- West West is redundant ... South West is an airline ... and East West leads to nowhere.

So, by default ... North West it is!

Congratulations little girl.

Kim Kardashian's private belongings are currently locked up in a VAULT while she hides away with her baby -- and they'll stay there ... at least until she moves into her new mansion, TMZ has learned.

A moving truck was photographed outside Kim's old Beverly Hills home on Tuesday -- while Kim was still in the hospital after giving birth -- and we're told it was there to pick up all her personal effects in order to be moved to the new $11 million mansion she bought with Kanye in Bel Air.

Unfortunately, the new house isn't ready yet -- and the old one is about to be renovated -- so we're told Kim had to place her stuff in storage vaults ... for the time being.

We're told Kim's stuff is occupying a total of three vaults -- and each vault only costs $50/month to rent ... so it's not a huge investment.

Kim is currently out of the hospital staying at a mystery location with the baby.

When Kim Kardashian first arrived to Cedars-Sinai to deliver her baby, she didn't get the fancy celebrity suite she had hoped for 'cause they were all in use ... and one of the VIP occupants was Dwight Howard's newest baby mama, TMZ has learned.

Sources connected to the births tell us ... before Kim went into labor, she had made arrangements to stay in one of the fancy suites at the L.A. hospital. But the baby came 5 weeks early, and the fancy suites were all booked. So Kim was placed in another unit.

But while Kim was laid out in bed, Kanye roamed the maternity ward ... and bumped into NBA superstar Dwight Howard, whose lady was giving birth to his child.

FYI -- Dwight's a seasoned vet when it comes to the maternity ward ... he's reportedly fathered 3 other kids (with 3 different women).

We're told Kanye and Dwight got along great ... with Yeezy giving Howard a preview of his new album "Yeezus."

As for Kim ... we're told she's finally out of the hospital -- and mother and the baby are shacked up in a private location.

Kanye West and Kim Kardashian's baby girl already has the Midas touch -- 'cause her poop-filled diapers could be solid gold ... according to the stars of "Hardcore Pawn."

Leslie Gold -- a bona fide expert in selling other people's crap -- told our photog in NYC ... if someone wanted to pawn baby Kimye's soiled poop sacks he'd definitely pony up some cash.

You gotta see how Les' co-stars -- his kids Ashley and Seth -- react to his answer, but truth is ... he's not off-base.

Kim Kardashian's mini-me gave birth this weekend -- LIVE on stage -- complete with Mini Kanye and even a mini-baby ... yes, that's possible.

Just hours after the real Kim gave birth ... Mini Kim pretended to pinch out a baby of her own during Beacher's Madhouse at the Roosevelt Hotel in Hollywood Saturday night.

The lil cast included a little person playing lil K&K's baby girl -- and the real Kim K's real BFF, Jonathan Cheban, just happened to be in attendance to deliver the kid.

Mini mazel.

Kim Kardashian and her brand new baby girl are both "doing great" ... and the kid is friggin' BEAUTIFUL ... this according to Kris Jenner.

Just one day after Kim gave birth, her mom Kris hit the red carpet at the 40th Annual Daytime Emmys in Beverly Hills yesterday and talked about the newest addition to the Kardashian family.

"We're all fine ... we're all good ... and extremely happy and thrilled for the new baby," Kris told HLN’s Showbiz Tonight. ... "She's doing great and she's beautiful."

Kim Kardashian has given birth to a baby girl ... TMZ has learned.

Source close to KK tell TMZ ... it was a NATURAL CHILD BIRTH. She started having contractions Friday night and went into full labor early Saturday AM.

Our sources tell us the baby and Kim are both in good health. We're told Kim delivered the baby at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center this morning ... 5 weeks early.

Our sources say BF Kanye West was there for the entire thing -- in the delivery room by Kim's side. We're told Kanye cancelled his appearance at his own record release party last night when Kim told him she was feeling "a little off."

It is the first child for Kim and Kanye.

Kim Kardashian's bff Jonathan Cheban -- a regular on "Keeping Up With the Kardashians" -- found himself in the middle of an airport emergency when a woman on his plane threatened to stab him with a knife.

Cheban was flying from JFK to LAX -- when a woman on his flight tweeted at him, "Jonathan Cheban is on my flight, should I cut him with my weapon?"

She added in another tweet, "I gotta pretty intense pocket knife with mehhh."

Cheban, a former PR exec, responded, "Police?"

When the plane landed at LAX, the woman was escorted off by police and subsequently detained. We're told cops were deeply concerned about her claim that she got a knife through airport security.

She later tried to bury the hatchet, tweeting back at Cheban, "It was a bad joke ... you look really hot babe." But airport police weren't taking any chances.

Police searched the woman outside the plane and determined she did NOT actually have a knife. She was subsequently released without further incident.

Cheban tells TMZ, he never personally alerted authorities -- someone else reported the tweets -- but later in Bev Hills he admitted the incident was very "scary."

Rob Kardashian's topless paparazzi drama is officially over -- the judge has officially dismissed the charges against RK for allegedly attacking a female snapper who took shirtless pics of him back in March.

We broke the story ... RK was charged with battery and theft after Andra Viak claimed an angry Rob got physcial with her and swiped her memory card when she took photos of the 26-year-old leaving a West Hollywood gym without a shirt.

Besides the criminal charges -- Viak sued Rob over the incident ... but she dropped the lawsuit last week when Kardashian agreed to pay for the camera equipment.

The only remaining formality was those 2 misdemeanor charges ... but Andra didn't want to pursue them ... and today, the judge officially dismissed the case.

They've both achieved international fame, both are extremely powerful, and both have their fair share of controversies -- but don't you DARE compare the Kardashian family to the Kennedys ... so says Robert F. Kennedy's daughter.

Kerry Kennedy -- a major human rights activist -- was out in D.C. yesterday when we asked how Kim K and the rest of the Kardashian squad could build a lasting family legacy like the Kennedys.

Kerry's response -- LAUGHTER ... followed by, "Are you comparing the Kennedys to the Kardashians?" ... followed by more laughter.

Sure, the Kardashians might be lacking in the accomplishment department, but they're also trailing when it comes to national scandals.

Kerry told us her family isn't worried about branding -- they just want to "serve" the American people.

Kanye West's swollen forehead has been avenged! The sign that took him down has been sentenced to hanging ... a few feet higher than before. Celebrity ... justice?

Kim Kardashian did her best to keep the goings on inside her baby shower yesterday a secret, but she failed to wrangle her crazy Aunt Karen ... who blabbed all about the party to the paps ... but some of what she said was just plain wrong.

Karen Haughton, who is Kris Jenner's sister, clearly had a good time and was as chatty as can be as she made her way out. She struck up conversations with photogs and posed for pics with fans ... all while she spilled details of what went on inside.

Karen -- who may have had a mimosa or 2 -- had a couple of teeny-weeny facts wrong:

-- She said the guests scored Rolexes as shower gifts (not true)
-- Kanye and Kim are the same height (not true)
-- She says she ate cake, and then seconds later said there was no cake, just cookies

Bruce Jenner's memory is disappearing faster than Kim's figure ... because the Kardashian patriarch has met Kanye West SEVERAL times, despite claiming he's only met the rapper once -- and Kim is pissed at her stepdad for saying it.

We've done our research -- and came up with at least FOUR different occasions where Bruce and Kanye were both present ... Kourtney's baby shower in May 2012, a taping of "X Factor" in November 2012, a Clippers game in December 2012, and the Kardashian family Christmas party.

The photographic evidence contradicts what Bruce told Extra this weekend ... that he only met Kanye once in his entire life, saying, "[Kanye is] not around."

We're told Kim's upset with her 63-year-old stepdad ... because Bruce makes it sound like Kanye doesn't care about the family.

And here's a clue that maybe Bruce isn't so into Kanye -- back in April, 2012, he said he was "not that excited" when Kim started dating the rapper ... because he felt Kim was rushing into a new relationship too quickly after leaving Kris Humphries.

That stupid, red parking sign that bashed Kanye West in the face last month will NEVER HURT ANYONE AGAIN ... 'cause it's just been raised WAAYYY above head-bashing range, TMZ has learned.

The sign (sporting a 1-0 record in street fights) ... famously K.O.'d Mr. West back in May when the rapper was trying to walk to a nearby restaurant while shielding his face from the paparazzi.

Kanye went BALLISTIC after the sign attack ... and unleashed a legendary screaming, running, angry tirade at the photogs.

Now, we've learned the people who own the property have decided to take action -- raising the sign by several feet ... so it towers over any regular-sized person.

Of course, it's possible the sign-owners made the move to prevent a future lawsuit ... but as for Kanye, we're told he hasn't made any sort of legal threat since the incident.

Bottom line -- the streets of Bev Hills are now safe for walkers ... unless you're a giant.

Here's a glowing Kim Kardashian in the middle of nearly flashing her pregnant goods in Santa Monica on Wednesday (left) -- and the now infamous and controversial JCPenney tea kettle (right).

All hail, Kim Kardashian.

Looking like the latest Kardashian TV show spin-off, movie director M. Night Shyamalan brought along his gorgeous brunette wife and three daughters to the premiere of "After Earth" in New York City on Wednesday.

While the 42-year-old "The Sixth Sense" filmmaker has not revealed any plans to exploit his beautiful brood by having a bunch of cameras follow them around documenting every single scripted scenario, you never know what kind of last minute twist M. Night might have up his sleeve.