You Might Want to Rethink

"Teen Mom" star Farrah Abraham just admitted to drinking and driving before she was busted for DUI last week ... but she's convinced she's done NOTHING wrong.

The 21-year-old called in to TMZ Live moments ago with a litany of ridiculous excuses for getting behind the wheel under the influence last week ... you won't believe how delusional she is.

TMZ broke the story ... Abraham was arrested in Nebraska on St. Patrick's Day night -- after blowing a .147 on a breathalyzer, nearly twice the legal limit.

And don't forget those crazy pics of her partying back in January ... drinking from the bottle and kissing chicks ... she knows how to get down.

"Teen Mom" star Farrah Abraham is telling people she's not a party girl and she got a DUI last week because of an illness ... a little hard to swallow after looking at these pictures.

The photos were snapped in January at Halo Ultra Lounge in Omaha. The promoter tells TMZ, Halo was hosting a lingerie soiree ... and Farrah showed up with a bunch of slutty-looking girls, all wearing next to nothing.

Then the boozing started ... with Farrah guzzling straight from the bottle.

You'll recall, just one day after Farrah was arrested for DUI last week -- blowing nearly twice the legal limit -- Farrah tweeted, "It's amazing what people believe and make up!"

Farrah says the reason the breathalyzer registered a .147 is because she was coughing a lot and couldn't blow properly.

For the love of blue meth ... someone has stolen a copy of a script from the upcoming final season of "Breaking Bad" and it was snatched from Heisenberg himself ... Bryan Cranston!

Cranston reported the priceless pages were stolen out of his car earlier this month when a thief broke in and stole a bag containing his iPad and the script, this according to KOAT in (where else?) Albuquerque.

According to the station, someone then called Cranston's assistant claiming to have overheard a bar conversation in which the alleged thief bragged that he had the script.

Cops confirm a man by the name of Xavier McAfee was arrested over the weekend for the burglary, but the script has not been recovered.

Lindsay Lohan continued her weekend of partying before rehab ... hitting a club in Santa Monica last night with a few friends ... including her rumored new man, Avi Snow.

LiLo was there to watch Avi's band play. We're told she left around midnight (kinda early for her, no?).

As TMZ first reported, Lindsay spent her Friday night drinking inside a club in San Diego, where spies say she asked to be served vodka from carafes, instead of bottles, so she wouldn't be seen with alcohol bottles on her table.

In is unclear if Lindsay was drinking last night as well. In the pics she's drinking San Pellegrino.

Lindsay Lohan continues to drink -- and drink often -- despite being sentenced this week to 90 days of lockdown rehab ... TMZ has learned.

Sources close to Lindsay tell TMZ she was at the bar of her hotel in Beverly Hills just hours after her court hearing on Monday ... knocking back vodka sodas. We're told Lindsay did not seem fazed by the irony of the situation.

It goes on -- we're told Lindsay went to a club in San Diego called FLUXX last night with a friend, arriving after midnight. Our spies say LiLo was wearing a Yankees cap and a hooded sweatshirt and sat at a VIP table ordering vodka on the rocks all night.

We're told Lindsay specifically requested that vodka be served from a glass carafe ... this way the table would not have any alcohol bottles on it.

Sources close to Lindsay tell us she is adamant she does not have a substance abuse problem and doesn't feel she needs professional help.

Soulja Boy's fans are turning on him ... blasting the rapper for posting glammed-up pics of the drug codeine on Instagram ... just days after Lil Wayne nearly died from an OD.

Soulja's known for posting pics of the painkiller on social networking sites -- along with giant bags of weed -- but fans went nuclear over these new photos.

Among the angry comments -- "How the f**k u drink s**t that you know can kill you?" and "Who brags about being sad and addicted to prescription medication?"

The comments continued ... "Who the hell thinks drinking cough syrup is cool?!?!? ... Look at lil Wayne had to have his stomach pumped 3x cause that damn cough syrup bulls**t."

It's our favorite video of the month -- and it's the 21st! Too Short trying in vain to flee from cops during his DUI arrest early Wednesday morning.

TMZ broke the story ... the rapper was popped for DUI in Hollywood and later booked on drug possession as well.

During the field sobriety test, Short is chatting with a couple of cops and then suddenly books it, but trips on the sidewalk and is subdued within seconds.

Short's rep says he ran because the rapper has had bad run-ins with law enforcement.

Rapper Too Short has just been arrested for DUI ... after allegedly attempting to run from police, TMZ has learned.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ, Short -- real name Todd Anthony Shaw -- was pulled over in L.A. a couple hours ago for some traffic violation ... and when cops approached the vehicle, he appeared under the influence.

Now here's where it gets weird -- when police attempted to administer a breathalyzer test, law enforcement sources tell us Too Short took off ... and tripped as he ran down the street.

Police got their man and placed him under arrest ... then tossed him into a police cruiser.

On the way back to the station, things got even crazier -- we're told Too Short tried to dump narcotics in the back of the cruiser.

Our sources say Too Short blew a .09 ... just over the .08 legal limit.

According to law enforcement sources, Too Short is currently being booked for DUI and felony narcotics possession.

Our camera guy thought he ran into "Real Housewives" star NeNe Leakes -- until a major death stare made him think twice, and say something that made this video way more awkward ... and hysterical.

Lindsay Lohan clearly took her latest rehab sentence to heart last night ... Absolut-ly ... she was back on the nightclub circuit.

Lindsay went full camouflage as her SUV pulled up to the AV Nightclub in Hollywood. With a blanket covering her face, she clearly did not want to be seen. Problem was ... there was a gaggle of photogs she couldn't shake, so a frustrated LiLo beat a hasty retreat without ever entering the club.

As you know ... a judge essentially told Lindsay she had a big fat substance abuse problem and ordered her to spend 90 days in lockdown rehab.

"Mob Wives Chicago" star Pia Rizza's Playboy dreams are OVER ... TMZ has learned, the lad mag has rejected her request for a nude feature.

TMZ broke the story ... Rizza found out someone was trying to sell nude pics of her to the media ... so rather than let them surface on their own, she decided to release them herself.

40-year-old Pia had hoped the pics would get her a Playboy spread ... but that's not happening any time soon ... because Playboy rejected her this week.

Sources close to Pia tell us the photos were submitted to Playboy last weekend, but the magazine quickly shut down the idea, saying they weren't interested at this time.

At this time ...

Lindsay Lohan is now in SERIOUS jeopardy of missing her court date tomorrow -- TMZ has learned she got off her flight to Los Angeles at the last minute and is now scrambling to find another way to the west coast.

Lindsay arrived at JFK a few hours ago after deciding NOT to fly back on Saturday as previously planned.

We're told Lindsay was on board the plane when for some reason ... she decided to get off. According to our sources, Lindsay was in such a hurry to get off the plane, she left her bags behind.

Sources close to Lindsay tell TMZ she believed there was a problem with the plane ... specifically that fuel was leaking. Lindsay is telling friends that 35 other people got off the plane as well because they too felt it was unsafe.

For whatever it's worth ... according to the website for the airport, the flight was delayed an hour taking off and has since been diverted to Las Vegas. [UPDATE: The airline tells TMZ the plane is in fact stopping in Vegas for more fuel before continuing to Los Angeles.]

Our sources say LiLo is now in an airport lounge ... calling, texting and emailing everyone she knows ... trying to get a private plane to take her to L.A.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ she MUST appear at the hearing tomorrow or the judge will issue a bench warrant.

3:30 PM PT -- According to our sources, Lindsay first booked a flight for 6:00 PM ET, but then decided to take a later flight with her mom Dina. As for whether or not she'll be on it, your guess is as good as ours.

Lindsay Lohan's travel history is as sketchy as her driving history ... and her rehab history ... and her dating history ... and TMZ has learned she missed a flight to Los Angeles last night, with her court date looming Monday.

LiLo is scheduled to appear in court tomorrow to begin her trial for allegedly lying to cops last summer following her crash on PCH. Law enforcement sources tell TMZ that Lindsay MUST be there in person or else a bench warrant will be issued.

Sources close to Lindsay tell TMZ she had a flight scheduled from NY to LA yesterday at around 9:00 PM ET ... but skipped it. Instead, Lindsay was at a club in New York to see a band called City of the Sun.

We're told Lindsay is trying to schedule a flight for later today, but has yet to do so.

Lindsay's history of missing flights is rather prolific -- she missed a court date in 2010 after she claimed to lose her passport. Last April, Lindsay missed her flight to the White House Correspondents' Dinner after she "couldn't get herself together."

The hearing is expected to start at 8:30 AM PT and we'll have it for you live.

A deposition has surfaced in the Kim Kardashian/Kris Humphries divorce in which the producer of Kim's reality show confesses Kim re-shot her reaction to Kris' marriage proposal ... problem for Kris -- it kills his fraud case.

According to the depo transcript -- obtained by Life & Style -- when Kris proposed to Kim on "Keeping Up with the Kardashians," a producer says Kim was "completely surprised" and didn't give a good reaction, so she asked that it be re-shot.

2 big problems for Kris:

1. Kris is alleging Kim fraudulently induced him to marry her. Since he proposed and she was surprised, it means it positively wasn't a grand scheme to dupe him.

2. Kris clearly knew she re-shot her reaction, so no matter what, he was in on everything.

Short story ... give it up Kris.

Justin Bieber can't trust Lil Twist with one of his REALLY, REALLY expensive cars anymore, so Twist has been reduced to driving around in only one of Justin's REALLY expensive cars.

Twist, who crashed Bieber's Fisker Karma on Tuesday, was spotted out in Calabasas yesterday ... this time riding around in Bieber's Range Rover.