Baby Mama

Levi Johnston has his priorities screwed up ... he's buying cars, dropping serious cash on hunting and taking fancy trips, instead of forking over child support ... this according to legal docs filed by Bristol Palin.

In the new docs -- obtained by TMZ -- Bristol claims Levi isn't a suitable parent on many levels to get what he's after -- 50/50 custody. She says aside from the fact that he's $67K behind in child support, he doesn't even visit Tripp on a regular basis.

In fact, Bristol believes Levi is so deep in the red, it constitutes a felony under Alaskan law.

And this is the best part ... Bristol wants the judge to say out loud that Levi is voluntarily underemployed -- translation ... LOSER.

Kanye West is slapping a ban on President Obama ... or at least all conversations about him as retaliation for the Prez calling Yeezy a "jackass."

Kanye's latest rant aired this morning on 107.9 FM in Philly. The hosts asked him about Obama's infamous comment ... and Kanye angrily responded, "I don't care if your're the president. I bring joy to people."

Kanye goes on to explain why he won't be talking about that guy in the White House anymore. Watch the tirade .. It's definitely arrogant, but also a little funny.

Kanye added that Obama better not talk about Kim Kardashian either, saying ... he "shouldn't mention my baby mama name, 'cause we both from Chicago."

Simon Cowell's baby mama Lauren Silverman and her ex won't be settling any future disputes through overpaid lawyers -- they've enlisted a trusted mutual friend to hash out their differences ... a man who also happens to be a famous BILLIONAIRE.

According to the divorce settlement, Lauren and Andrew Silverman have named Sir Philip Green as a mediator. Green is the current CEO of the Arcadia Group, which owns the likes of Topshop, and is worth a reported $5.3 billion.

Under the settlement, Green will be one of two mediators (the other being attorney Martin Edelman) for the next 5 years.

We're told the reason Green was named a mediator is because Lauren, Andrew, and Simon each consider him to be a close friend -- and feel comfortable using Green as a neutral go-between.

Pauly D's baby mama Amanda Markert doesn't deserve ANY custody of their child -- so says the father of her first kid, who thinks Pauly couldn't possibly be a worse parent than Amanda already is.

Lance Gerbino is obviously biased, but he's still got a lot to say -- telling TMZ, Amanda has done nothing but spew huge, wretched lies ever since they met.

Get this ... Lance claims a month before he knocked up Amanda she told him she had cancer and couldn't get pregnant. Further, Lance says when she did get pregnant ... Amanda left him in the dark about whether he was the daddy.

Lance says Amanda's now doing to Pauly what she did to him -- lying and playing games -- and that's why he believes Pauly should get full custody of Amabella.

Amanda declined to comment ... but we spoke with a close relative of hers who told us Lance is full of BS and called him "a freaking, druggie liar."

Pauly D has his own reservations about Gerbino ... one reason Pauly wants full custody of Amabella is because there's a felony drug arrest warrant out for Gerbino, and he doesn't want his baby anywhere near the guy.

Amber Portwood may be hanging out at a Panera Bread with her ex ... but that doesn't mean they're bangin' again ... this according to Amber and her baby daddy.

Amber and Gary Shirley made it clear outside the tasty food chain in Indiana today ... telling a photog they have no plans to get back together following her exit from prison this week.

As you may recall -- Gary and Amber had an extremely volatile relationship ... Back in '10 Amber was arrested for attacking Gary while MTV cameras were filming for "Teen Mom."

It was a whole thing.

For now, it seems the two are simply trying to get along for the sake of their kid ... but in case that doesn't work out -- hopefully Gary's learned to duck.

Pauly D will meet his 5-month-old baby for the first time today ... TMZ has learned.

We've learned the MTV star and his baby mama Amanda Markert have hammered out a temporary truce in their ongoing custody battle -- and Amanda has agreed to let Pauly meet their daughter Amabella.

Sources close to Amanda tell TMZ ... the meeting will take place at a neutral location somewhere near Amanda's home in New Jersey sometime in the next few hours.

It's a huge step for the parents -- who've hated each other's guts ever since the baby was conceived during a drunken night in Vegas back in 2012. Amabella was born back in May.

Pauly is fighting Markert for full custody of the little girl ... accusing Amanda of being a horrible mom who's using the baby as leverage for fame and to get money from him.

Markert says Pauly's interest in his daughter is all for show and is not real.

A rep for Pauly D had no comment.

Good to see they've put their differences aside ... at least for now.

David Arquette remains fertile ... TMZ has learned his girlfriend is pregnant.

Multiple sources confirm to TMZ ... David's GF, Christina McLarty is in her 4th month. McLarty has been on several entertainment shows, including "Entertainment Tonight."

David and Christina have been on-and-off for 2 years.

David has been boasting to the crew of the movie he's shooting in Vancouver that he's going to be a daddy again.

As you know, David also has a 9-year-old -- Coco - with ex-wife Courteney Cox.

David's rep could not be reached for comment.

Pauly D has just been REJECTED by his baby mama ... who says she will NOT let him visit his 5-month old daughter unsupervised.

Pauly's lawyer sent a letter to Amanda Markert's attorney, requesting that Pauly get visitation of the little girl, Amabella, for 2 weeks beginning today.

TMZ has learned ... Markert's lawyer told Pauly's mouthpiece to pound sand, saying Pauly cannot take the baby unsupervised for that period of time. So it seems she might be open to visitation if she or someone else she chooses is present.

Our sources say Pauly D's lawyer has agreed to supervised visitation but now all they're getting is radio silence.

Pauly's rep tells us, "Paul and his entire family are eager to meet and spend time with Paul’s daughter. Paul has been requesting visitation for quite some time now, but his requests have either gone unresponded to or denied. He and his family are committed to being a significant part of his daughter’s life and are excited to make that a reality. "

The man who allegedly beat Adrian Peterson's 2-year-old son to death has just been released from jail.

27-year-old Joseph Patterson was released from Minnehaha County Jail in South Dakota this morning after posting $750,000 bond.

The bond was lowered from $1 million yesterday after Patterson pled not guilty in court. He has been charged with second degree murder and 2 counts of first degree manslaughter, as well as aggravated battery of an infant. He has also been charged with felony child abuse.

Pauly D's got his work cut out for him with his new baby mama -- so claims the daddy of her 1st child ... who has some serious words of warning for the "Jersey Shore" star.

Meet 33-year-old Lance Gerbino, the father of Amanda Markert's 5-year-old son. His friend just posted this video on Instagram, where Lance calls Amanda a crazy "drug addict stripper" -- something she strenuously denies.

Lance is no angel himself -- as we reported, one reason Pauly wants full custody is because there's a felony drug arrest warrant out for him, and he thinks there's a danger if Lance comes in contact with the baby.

As for Amanda, her lawyer tells us, "Amanda is an extremely wholesome young lady who is goal oriented." He adds she's never been a stripper and has absolutely no drug issues.

BTW ... Lance's friend has taken the video off Instagram.

Pauly D says his baby mama is a shameless fame whore who's treating their daughter like a winning lottery ticket ... and he won't let her keep him from seeing his little girl.

Pauly was rollin' through the airport in North Carolina this morning when he was asked how he felt about becoming a dad.

"I want to give the baby the best life she ever had," Pauly said.

He also joked that D.T.F. no longer means, "Down to F**k," ... it's now, "diapers, tantrums and formula."

But that terrible joke aside, Pauly says he's ready to go to war with Amanda Markert because, "I want my baby."

"Jersey Shore" star Vinny Guadagnino says he doesn't wanna knock up any ex-Hooters waitresses like Pauly D ... so he makes sure to wear a jimmy hat -- on top of his condom.

Vinny was strolling through NYC when we asked about co-star Pauly D's baby mama drama ... and he was pretty open about the whole thing.

V.D. says he's not lookin' to knock up ANYONE ... so when he bangs around, he double bags his junk ... just in case. No love child for this Guido.

Fun Fact -- Wearing two condoms actually INCREASES the chance of pregnancy ... 'cause the friction can break the condom (duh, remember 4th grade sex ed?)

The chick Pauly D knocked up claims she's no longer looking for a custody war, and is now willing to accept co-parenting with him -- but TMZ has learned the "Jersey Shore" star has serious concerns about another guy in her life.

Amanda Markert called in to TMZ Live to talk about Pauly's fight to gain full custody of their 5-month old daughter, Amabella -- and said, "I would hope that no one would ever want to take an infant away from her mother, and I'm hoping that she can have 2 parents in her life that can get along together."

That's a huge shift -- as we first told you, Amanda and Pauly basically hate each other -- and she confirmed they've had no relationship whatsoever since their one-night stand in Las Vegas.

Sources close to Pauly tell us one of the reasons he wants full custody is because Amanda's first baby daddy (of her 5-year-old son) is currently a wanted man for felony drug charges.

According to a Florida police report ... he was busted for DUI after a car accident, and police say they found him at the scene with bloody needle marks in his arm, and methadone pills -- commonly used to treat heroin addicts.

He skipped a court hearing, and now there's a bench warrant out for his arrest -- but Amanda explained she's already taken steps to protect herself and her children from the guy.

Amanda may want peace, but ... watch the clip. This is ain't no rom com.

One day Pauly D will tell his daughter the heartwarming story about that time he had a drunken, condom-less one night stand in Las Vegas ... with her mom.

Ok, maybe not so heartwarming.

10:50 A.M. PDT -- Pauly just sent a Tweet that seems to address the situation: "Sometimes in life things aren't planned and they may even scare you at first, but they end up being a blessing."

Pauly D wanted his baby mama to have an abortion ... and here's how we know. His baby mama is trying to sell texts he sent to her urging her to end the pregnancy.

TMZ has learned ... Amanda Markert is trying to hawk the text messages to various media outlets in which Pauly asked her to end the pregnancy and he offered to foot the bill.

Sources tell TMZ ... at the time Pauly felt it was the right thing to do, partly because of the way the baby was conceived. There was no plan to have a child ... and the fact is it was a one-night stand.

As TMZ first reported ... Pauly has come around in a big way, not only trying to see the baby but he's fighting for custody.

By the way, get this -- sources close to Pauly say Amanda actually took the money for the abortion, but then ... obviously ... decided to keep the child.

Hours before Pauly D knocked up Amanda Markert, they were both raging at a crazy pool party in Vegas ... and TMZ has several pics of the boozy scene right before the drunken conception.

The two met at the legendary Rehab pool party at the Hard Rock Hotel in the summer of 2012 ... Pauly was working the DJ booth and Amanda was partying her face off in a smokin' hot bikini.

At one point during the party, Amanda somehow got on stage (probably because she's hot) ... and sprayed down the crowd with a bottle of champagne. Later she was seen double-fisting novelty-sized cocktails.

Soon after that, she got some one-on-one time with Pauly -- and 9 months later she gave birth to his daughter. A true love story ...

But the connection they had in Vegas stayed in Vegas ... 'cause now Pauly and Amanda HATE each other's guts and are at war over custody and child support.

Vegas baby, VEGAS!!!