Humor

We've all have embarrassing photos from our past -- one of Rob Lowe's surfaced Tuesday night, and his son had the BEST time railing on his dad.

Lowe -- who was celebrating his "deal with the devil" 51st birthday -- was out at Craig's in West Hollywood with his family when a young autograph seeker showed up with an epic photo of Rob, circa 1980s.

Lowe's son Johnny was hilarious, invoking Rob's infamous DirecTV commercials.

Chris Rock just poked fun at the photoshopped pic going around the Internet ... mocking Suge Knight's plight.

TMZ broke the story, Suge claims he's blind in his left eye and that's why while driving out of the Tam's parking lot he struck 2 people, killing one ... instead of just bearing left and avoiding everyone.

BOOM!!!!

John Madden just WENT OFF on Will Ferrell -- ripping the guy over his MLB Spring Training stunt ... saying it was disrespectful and insulting to the game of baseball ... and yes, he's being serious.

The NFL legend called in to KCBS Morning Newswatch right before Ferrell took the field with 10 MLB teams in Arizona yesterday ... and essentially said the stunt robbed real players of REAL opportunities and made a mockery of the game.

"I hate it," Madden said of the stunt ... "That's a lack of respect for the game and for what players have to do to get where they are."

Unclear if Madden knew Ferrell's antics were part of a charity fundraiser that helped to benefit multiple cancer organizations.

Still, probably shouldn't count on a Madden cameo in Ferrell's next flick.

The "Mean Tweeter" on "Jimmy Kimmel Live!" who blamed Barack Obama for the hike in beer prices just caught a break ... FREE BOOZE -- but this time, he really can THANK the Prez.

Obama took part in Kimmel's "Mean Tweets" segment Thursday night and read one from Eric Matthews, which said, "A 30 rack of coors light is $23 now at Sun Stop. Thanks, Obama."

Matthews was shocked his online quip got read aloud by the leader of the free world ... and this morning he hit up Sun Stop to celebrate. When he told the teller about Kimmel, Eric got hooked up with a free case of Keystone and a bottle of Bacardi.

Watch the video, it's pretty awesome -- Eric shotgunned one of the cans outside to celebrate ... and of course, gave thanks to Obama.

FYI -- it may be early, but Eric's not an alcoholic ... he's on his way to celebrate Spring Break.

Justin Bieber took on Kevin Hart in a charity tennis match yesterday ... with Will Ferrell acting as line judge. Here's what we learned:

-- Kevin Hart sucks at tennis
-- Justin Bieber sucks less
-- Will Ferrell didn't play because he has an inflamed buttock

It was actually a pretty cool event ... the 11th annual Desert Smash in La Quinta, CA to raise money for Cancer for College, which provides college scholarships to cancer survivors.

Check out the clip ... you can see Bieber vs. Hart ... with Ferrell roasting the athletes during the match. Funny stuff.

But one of the most interesting parts of the day ... Bieber was partnered up with Canadian tennis pro Genie Bouchard (pictured below).

Of course, you probably remember Bouchard as the 21-year-old tennis hottie who made headlines last year during a post-game interview when she said Bieber was her dream date.

So, what happened when they were partnered up? They high-fived a lot, they posed for pics together and they seemed to be getting along ... but so far, no word on what happened after the game.

Derek Zoolander and Hansel McDonald un-retired for a surprise appearance in Paris today ... treating the crowd at the Valentino show to an epic "walk-off."

Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson stunned the crowd by bringing back the characters for Fashion Week ... as sort of a dry-run for the upcoming "Zoolander" sequel.

Neither said a word -- in true male model fashion -- but worked their magic on the runway.

Finally ... more funding for "The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good and Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too."

They're so hot right now.

He's burned Kobe ... He's burned Barkley ... and now Shaquille O'Neal has his sights on Justin Bieber -- 'cause he's been tapped to be an official flamethrower at the Comedy Central Roast.

Shaq -- along with stars like Snoop Dogg, Ludacris, Jeff Ross and Martha Stewart (what?!) -- will be tasked with ripping the Biebs to shreds in front of a packed house on March 30th.

Shaq and Bieber have history -- they once had a dance battle back before Bieber turned heel.

If there's one thing Kevin Hart knows ... it's how to build anticipation -- well, that and comedy -- and he fueled up the Oscars hosting hype train with his dinner date Monday night.

Kevin hit up Craig's with Ellen DeGeneres -- making us think he might be looking for tips on how to land the 2016 Oscars gig ... for which he's been rumored to be a candidate.

The buzz has been building since the second NPH wrapped up this year's debacle, and this video will certainly add to it.

Michael Sam just dominated a TMZ photog at LAX like he was The Mountain ... and we were Oberyn Martell ... and it's pretty damn hilarious.

Here's how it went down ... One of our crack camera guys got the newly engaged Sam to not only tell us when and where he's getting married ... but who he's inviting and where he's registered.

Awesome, right?

Now for the twist ... He's getting married in Westeros with Tyrion and Tywin Lannister -- AND Daenerys Targaryen (good luck with those three) -- and he's registered at King's Landing.

Yeah, it's Red Wedding-level deception.

Here's the thing ... most of you probably got the fact that those are all references to the HBO show "Game Of Thrones" -- but the one dude who didn't was our camera guy.

Comedy Central is pulling out the big guns for Justin Bieber's roast ... and we've learned two comedians who don't hold back have signed on.

Sources involved in the roast tell TMZ ... the network has locked down both Jeff Ross and Hannibal Buress for the big show next month. You'll recall, Ross has already said he was ready to destroy.

As for Buress ... well, you can ask Bill Cosby about that.

Kevin Hart will officiate as Roast Master, and there are some huge names producers are now gunning to get.

Never say never Justin ... about backing out.

Kevin Hart might be a little dizzy 'cause Little League legend Mo'ne Davis just put him in the SPIN CYCLE in the Sprite NBA Celebrity Hoops Game moments ago.

Hart -- who's a 3-time Celeb Hoops MVP -- caught himself in the unenviable position of being one-on-one with Davis ... who just ate his lunch during a ridiculous drive to the rim.

Check it out -- Kev is playing defense (he takes this stuff seriously folks) but Mo'ne leaves him in the dust ... and finishes like a pro (which she'll probably be eventually).

North West is NOT a fan of daddy's new shoes ... Kim Kardashian had her hands more than full when the kid went full-on Chernobyl Thursday night at a NY fashion show.

The pics say it all ... Kim and North were front and center at Kanye West's Adidas unveiling at Fashion Week ... but North wasn't having any part of it and threw a fit.

From the looks on their faces ... Diddy, Anna Wintour, Jay Z, and Beyonce were amused/annoyed at the tantrum ... at one point Kim grabs North for a quick exit.

Maybe Kim should roll like Jay and Bey ... leave the little miracle at home.

Kids, right?

Justin Bieber's heartfelt video about changing his ways might melt the hearts of Beliebers, but comedian Jeff Ross could care less -- he's still gonna rip him to shreds at the roast.

The Roastmaster General was just getting back to L.A. -- fresh off roasting Terry Bradshaw at the Super Bowl -- when we asked him about Justin begging for forgiveness for all his d-bag antics.

Let's just say Jeff seems unmoved.

As for what's off limits during Bieber's upcoming Comedy Central Roast ... Ross had a pretty surprising response -- especially considering JB's checkered past.

Watch this ... you can almost see Ross licking his chops.

Twerking while hanging out of a moving car, and tumbling out of said car ... has to be the stupidest -- yet also hysterical -- thing an Atlanta college student ever did ... but it's made her a Vine superstar.

The video has more than 7.5 million views ... and although everyone's calling it twerking ... Brittany Swift set the record straight ... telling us she was really doing something called The Whip. We stand corrected.

Swift says her favorite jam -- K Camp's "Lil Bit" -- came on the radio ... and she just had to break out The Whip ... but couldn't wait for her sister to slow down. Stupidly ... she started the dance with the door open, and while switching legs she says her sister hit the brakes and she went flying.

Amazingly, Swift says the #FAIL looked way worse than it was. No broken bones, no bruises ... just one scratch and some ashy elbows..

Little lotion and she's back in the game.

8:30 AM PT -- The roast was Bieber's idea! We've learned Justin actually called Comedy Central to say he wanted the roast to be a celebration for his 21st birthday ... which is March 1.

Like a tattooed lamb to the slaughter, Justin Bieber has agreed to be the guest of honor at a Comedy Central Roast in March ... and you can already hear Jeff Ross licking his chops.

Ryan Seacrest broke the news on Twitter ... saying, "Yes I got confirmation @justinbieber is getting roasted by @ComedyCentral in march...love u justin but it's time lol #BieberRoast."

Word on the street is that Bieber was game to be roasted for a while ... and had been hoping to work out a deal with the network.

Now, it seems like everything's a go ... and it'll be interesting to see which comics come out to burn Bieber.

As for roast topics, it's not like there's a shortage of material, for example:

-- Pissing in mop buckets
-- Egging houses
-- Lambo arrest
-- Fighting Orlando Bloom
-- Dropping the N-word
-- Calvin Klein modeling shots
-- Anne Frank shout out
-- Push-ups in jail
-- Fighting with Keyshawn Johnson
-- Fear of shirts
... and oh yeah, his music career.

Careful what you wish for.

Ralphie May was a mile high during his concert in Colorado Thursday night ... so wasted the cops had to step in.

The concert started out well ... the opening acts were great. But things went South when Ralphie tried to take the stage ... he was so slow it took forever.

When he got the mic things got worse. Audience members tell us he couldn't string a sentence together, couldn't finish jokes, couldn't remember what he had just said.

Audience members started yelling at him to start telling jokes, then demanded refunds. Some die-hard supporters yelled back at the hecklers and it went all Cosby.

Ralphie finished the show, but by then cops had come to maintain order.

Ralphie's camp tells TMZ ... "He was like a kid in a candy store, being in Colorado for the first time since pot became legal." They add, "We believe in conspiracy theories, we think Cosby snuck in and drugged him. We're pressing charges because we're within the statute of limitations."

We're told what really did Ralphie in ... edibles.