Humor

There's nothing more beautiful than a bride on her wedding day ... but that might not be the case when the bride is punk legend Fat Mike.

The lead singer of NOFX and his now wife, Soma Snakeoil, eloped during a secret Vegas wedding on New Year's Eve ... TMZ has learned.

The unconventional couple decided to exchange vows as the opposite genders when they planned the wedding -- which we're told was only a week before the ceremony.

Sources close to the couple tell us Matt Skiba from Blink 182 and Alkaline Trio was Mike's best man and "bridesman." The guest list was only 8 people and the dress code was lots of black and even more leather.

Soma and Fatty were engaged for over a year and have lived together for 6 years. We're told they wrote their own vows and Mike promised to be her "10,000 night stand."

Mike Tyson just took his first loss in years ... but to be fair, his opponent was an absolute machine.

A CyBoard.

Iron Mike posted a video of him cruising around on the contraption to his Instagram moments ago ... and he was doing fine at first ... then he wasn't.

YouTube network AwesomenessTV and online magazine Betches are at war ... and it's all over who's the bigger betch.

Betches is suing the YouTube network for slapping the word "betch" on several web series.

Betches says they own the trademark for the word "Betches" and AwesomenessTV has been skating a fine line by using the word in several satirical comedy series with titles like, "Betch: A Sketch Show" and "Ariana Grande Is Good At Everything - Betch!," among others.

When Betches asked them to stop, AwesomenessTV refused pointing out "betch" is fair game since it's a slang term used in colloquial American English.

Betches is asking AwesomenessTV to stop using their famous word and fork any profits they've made from using it.

AwesomenessTV tells TMZ Betches does not have a trademark to use the term "betches" for content.

Oklahoma City Thunder sharpshooter Steve Novak says he's in full agreement with his fellow 3-point sniper Steph Curry ... about the wonder of automatic toilets.

Novak was out in L.A. when we asked him about Curry saying his recent hot streak could be attributed to his brand new bathroom buddy ... an automatic toilet that makes Curry super happy.

Check out the clip -- Novak thinks about it for a second and has to agree ... you'd definitely shoot better if you're free of certain ... intestinal burdens.

Prune juice, guys ... it's cheaper ... just sayin.'

The Miz just spilled the beans ... revealing which WWE Superstar can unload like none other when you're talking passin' gas.

Miz appears on this week's episode of Matt Weiss and Theo Von's "Allegedly" podcast and is asked if a wrestler's ever had an "accident" in the ring. The question unleashes a pretty interesting convo ... and it's no surprise Miz says The Big Show, who weighs in at 500 lbs and stands almost 7 feet tall breaks the worst wind.

Miz also dishes on some of the biggest WWE fans in Hollywood ... the answer may surprise you.

You can download the full episode here on December 29.

The latest business to jump on the insane "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" marketing bandwagon will leave you asking, "Is that a lightsaber in your pants or are you happy to see me?"

Sex toy companies have been stocking products geared toward die-hard fans and profiting big time. Fun Factory tells TMZ its sales have shot up 75% because of a spaceship-like product called the Bi Stronic Fusion ... a hands-free self-guided vibrator.

Novelty condom maker Graphic Armor says it launched Star Wars-ish (it's not officially sanctioned) themed condoms earlier this year, and moved several thousand just this month at $2.20 a pop. BTW, they're one size fits all.

Because size matters not.

Thinking about entering a dance battle? Might wanna recruit Shaq as your partner.

The Big Fella teamed up with a little girl for a 2-on-2 battle at the Kohls headquarters in Menomonee Falls, Wisconsin ... and killed it.

Watch the clip ... Shaq reached all the way back to 1994 and busted out a little Tootsee Roll action!!

Memba the 69 Boys? Reginald "Busta Nut" Gunderson and Michael "Quick Skeet" Fisher??

The 90s were fun.

In the time it takes Kendall Jenner to make a U-turn in her classic 1957 Corvette Stingray ... you could raise a family and solve world hunger.

Jenner went full grandma driving her gorgeous whip -- babying it so much she had to enlist outside help just to get going.

We'll say this ... at least she treats her ride -- which she bought for her 20th birthday -- way better than Kylie treats hers!

Conor McGregor is starting to upgrade ... rollin' around Santa Monica in a $500,000 CAR!!!!

Check out out the footage of the Notorious One ... doing some Christmas shopping in his Rolls-Royce Phantom Drophead Coupe ... while bumping old school Mariah Carey.

Don't judge him. Old school Mariah is dope.

As for the whip, it's just a drop in the bucket if you consider the fact UFC boss Lorenzo Fertitta just came out and said he expects Conor to be the UFC's first $100 MILLION fighter.

Carrie Fisher awakened her own dance force at the European premiere after-party in London Wednesday night.

The 'Force Awakens' star was goofing for cameras as she did something slightly vogue-ish while celebrating. Woulda been better in the slave girl costume, but still fun.

BTW, look at her right knee, because we gotta ask ...

Boobs and doughnuts -- individually awesome, but together they're messing up biz for the famous strip club chain Spearmint Rhino ... according to a new lawsuit.

In the suit, Spearmint Rhino says Rhino Doughnuts and Coffee -- a South Florida chain -- is intentionally confusing customers and taking advantage of its already famous brand.

The strip club giant points out it's been featured on "South Park," 'The Tonight Show,' and "Tosh.0." Far as we can tell, the doughnut joint's first national exposure is this lawsuit.

Spearmint Rhino wants it all -- profits from the shop, destruction of all the shop's gear with rhinos, and even its Internet domain name.

About the only thing they're NOT suing for ... free doughnuts for life. Stupid.

Best autocorrect ever?

Dictionary.com defines "lardass" as ... "a person having unusually large buttocks."

Just sayin' ...

Madonna let it be known there's only room for one diva on her tour -- and that's her -- after she lit up fans who booed her for showing up late for a Manchester, England concert.

Madge blamed Monday night's delay on technical difficulties, but first she responded directly to the sea of boos in the most Madonna way ever: "All you bitches who keep complaining about it can shut the f*** up!"

Her tirade got even more detailed ... you gotta hear her run down of what she was NOT doing during the delay.

Carrie Fisher seized control of the red carpet livestream during the premiere of "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" ... and it was everything you could have hoped for.

Fisher went a tad off script, as she tried to hurl questions at fellow co-star Oscar Isaac at the Chinese Theatre in Hollywood ... bringing up her hard partying days, and ending with a barrage of curses.

Victoria's Secret model Josephine Skriver got smashed from behind when she underestimated the power of the ocean during a recent photo shoot in St. Barths.

The video is awesome from the very start -- Josephine rolling in the sand, ass in the air -- but gets even better when she decides to wash that sand out of her nether regions.

Watch, you won't be disappointed when the surf takes aim at Josephine. It's alright to laugh ... her tiny frame held up just fine.

The folks at Goodwill are telling their employees to be on the lookout for 'Kanye face.'

Honchos based in the Illinois division have fired off a newsletter instructing employees on how to have appropriate reactions and emotions in the workplace.

The bosses make it clear ... Kanye's zombie face is not the way to do business. When you're happy, show it. When you're concerned, adjust your face accordingly. Translation ... Kanye's "one size fits all" look is inappropriate and ineffective.

The newsletter has pissed off some employees who are Kanye fans, who feel it's wrong to make the rapper the poster child for emotionally vacant worker bees.